Broken Life, Broken Girl

Here I am

Another day older

pushed over the edge

used up

bent and broken

Life didn't turn out like it was promised

Life with you doesn't feel honest

because whenever I am with you

I have never felt more alone

every day the pain grows stronger

working its way through my heart

getting deeper and darker

I am not the same girl you remember

she is lost to the darkness

whats left is sickness and hopeless

I will never be what you want me to be

I will never be the perfect girl

I make mistakes

because I live in a real and ordinary world

I hate myself more than ever

even though you told me it would only get better

now you tell me you never wanted me

not now

not ever

I feel your hatred cracking every bone in my body

I tried to fight it

but it did nothing but haunt me

I am a vile creature nothing but waste

I will lay in a pool of blood and enjoy the taste

one day I will meet my maker

then I will be loved truly

not stuck and bounded to a faker

Sorry I haven't posted in so long. I kind of took a break from writing poems. I will post more when I can. Thanks for all of the support <3

Comments 2 comments

pstraubie48 profile image

pstraubie48 3 years ago from sunny Florida

I hope that some of the joy of earth's existence comes to you... and that disappointment and cynicism do not cloud your life on the planet.

Never let someone else steal your day....if this is you, figuratively, or , the universal are better than is too short for us to be caught up in allowing ourselves to be defined by someone else's expectations or treatment of us.

Been here, done this...hopefully....all is good in your world.

Sending Angels your way :) ps

Astra Nomik profile image

Astra Nomik 2 years ago from Edge of Reality and Known Space

This is dark and the turmoil washes in the words like water on a shoreline.

It needs calmness. Wow, I am always amazed at how dark your writing can be and yet so incredibly illuminating as well.

But I would never let hate take over me and consume me. It is just a rock that burns the hand for every second we hold it. The longer we hold it, the deeper it leaves its mark. I know it from experience. it's like that damn finger ring from Tolkien's book. LOL. It will consume but we can choose if that happens, or not. We can discard it.

I know we as people who want to find love - can not always get the ones we want or what we want. We might aim too high or set our aspirations too high. But on the way to finding love, sometimes incredible discoveries find us instead.

Life is too valuable to let it be controlled by those things.

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