Cable Company Customer Service
Cable Company Customer Service
7:40 pm… the cable is out
Just static on the TV
Google whom to call
1 800 number being dialed….
“Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed”
I don’t want a frickin menu… I want someone to fix the cable.
“Press 1 for service in English”
Think I'll press 235556 and see if they have anyone who speaks ancient Latin
Great.. their ‘lines are busier than usual’. That is NOT unusual
“Please stay on the line”
Hire more reps you cheap asses…
I give you enough each month to at least have someone answer the phone.
Barry Manilow sings while I am on hold
I hate Barry Manilow
I hate Mandy
I hate the cable company
5 minutes on hold….
The Musak has stopped... and here comes the sales pitch.
To Hell with you and your up-selling message, and damn the bundle package offer!!
I don’t want to see 24 hours of people bidding on storage units…
I could care less about the Duggars!
Oprah has a channel now!?! A whole bloody channel!?!?
You have GOT to be kidding!?
10 minutes on hold
God I hate these people
This call is costing me a fortune
My baby is crying out for Teletubbies… fix the #%@% cable now!
I swear I’m going to throw the TV out the window and buy a book
God I hate reading
15 minutes on hold
I’m seriously going to go down there and pee on their bloody doors
This is unbelievable
I have a life to lead…
Answer the phone you #%#@%@ers
20 minutes on hold
Wait... the recording has stopped!
I hear a click
‘Yes… Hello!?.. Hello?!.. I need help with my cable…”
“I’m sorry, our offices are now closed”
“Our normal hours of operation are Monday to Friday, 9 am to 8 pm”
Oh, you bastards!
You #%@#%@%@%^ bastards!!
“Please.. don’t swear in front of the baby”
The wife tries to calm me down
I know what to do!!
I’m going to write an email!
Going to tell the president of the company what I think of him!
Going to tell his vice presidents too!
Going to write everyone at the whole !@$%# cable company!
Going to write Barry Manilow and tell him what he can do to himself!
Laptop booting up.
Get myself a beer.. this is going to take some time but it’s going to feel sooo good.
Maybe I should do it in a poem format?
What rhythms with ‘jerk’?
Here we go! Here we go! Here we go!
What the ____!?!?
Webpage Not Found!?!?
Internet cable is down too!?!?!
Damn you !!
Damn you Google! Damn you Bill Gates! Damn you Barry Manilow!
1. The opinions expressed above do not necessary reflect those of HubPages or HubPages staff members. They do, however, accurately reflect those of the the author, and approximately 90% of Cable company customers.
2. Mandy reached "Number position 1" in the USA music charts in 1974. Biblical experts agree that this was the first sign of the apocalypse
More by this Author
CROWN ROYAL WHISKEY: AN OVERVIEW OF THE TOP 6 CROWN ROYAL CANADIAN WHISKEYS.. INCLUDING CROWN ROYAL LIMITED EDITION, CROWN ROYAL RESERVE/SPECIAL RESERVE, CROWN ROYAL XR, CROWN ROYAL BLACK, AND CROWN ROYAL CASK NO. 16
TIM HORTONS... WHEN GOOD TIM HORTONS COFFEE GOES BAD. TIM HORTONS LOCATIONS ACROSS CANADA AND THE US ARE SERVING BURNT COFFEE, AND PEOPLE ARE NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT
A Funny Look at the life and times of the cartoon character Elmer Fudd