Dentist Numbs Bunny

Early Easter morning, the dentist had her reasons for injecting Novocain into all four of the Easter Bunny’s feet. He flopped instead of hopped. He tried and tried to move forward with his baskets. He was determined not to upset millions of children, but he always landed with a splat on his side. Poor frustrated bunny!

When the dentist's kids awoke and found no candy-laden baskets, she secretly savored their disappointment. She pretended to be disappointed, too, soothing, "My poor moppets. Who could forget such precious children as you?" Like a small but significant number of dentists and surgeons, she was a sadist. (I have personal experience with a sadistic dentist. He refused my sister anesthetic while he filled several of her teeth on the pretext that he did it because she didn't brush. He then came to the waiting room and bragged to my mother that he did it, adding, "When my kids don't brush their teeth, I brush them for them. You'd better believe they always do it themselves after that experience." He probably brushed their gums raw. You can bet your bottom dollar that my mom never took my sister back to that dentist.) She especially enjoyed knowing that her kids’ sadness was echoed and multiplied worldwide.

If caught, she planned to say, “Easter candy sitting in a rabbit hole does not cause cavities. This is good for everyone. I didn’t even really hurt the rabbit.”

She knew how to be really, really bad and look really, really good.

 

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Comments 10 comments

Ghost32 5 years ago

EEE-EWWW!!!

What a WICKED good cautionary tale!

I had all of my teeth removed in 1992. My wife had hers out in 1997. In the process for Pam, we came within a bunny's whisker of reporting the dentist to the State Board for bunny abuse. Her first dentures were so ill-fitting that she looked like Bucky Beaver on steroids (which I mentioned in a demand letter to Mr. Dentist).

EEE-EWWWW!!

Voted Up and across the board--well, no, not beautiful; I'm still too torn between maybe hurling and going all postal in some random dentist's office...:)


cathylynn99 profile image

cathylynn99 5 years ago from northeastern US Author

sorry about your dentist troubles. i have a great dentist now. she explains everything, answers questions patiently, and backs up her work, which is already good. i'm currently having some specialty dentistry done. if i weren't already married to the greatest guy on earth, i'd propose to this down-to-earth, compassionate, soft-spoken specialty dentist.

sounds like you won't often need to risk the hazards of finding a good dentist. if you do, friends can usually guide you based on their own experience.


christopheranton profile image

christopheranton 5 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

I hate dentists, not personally, just going to them.

If someone could invent a pleasurable way of dentistry, they could make a fortune.


cathylynn99 profile image

cathylynn99 5 years ago from northeastern US Author

christopher,

yup, no one likes pain. nitrous, maybe?

my current specialty dentist sprays a numbing med on my gum before injecting me with anesthetic. it's not perfect, but it helps.

my regular dentist has me raise my left hand if i want her to stop so i can say something (like "more novocain, please").


mdlawyer profile image

mdlawyer 5 years ago

Cathylynn, interesting. I have never gone to a dentist, though two of my teeth are worm-eaten!! Voted up.


cathylynn99 profile image

cathylynn99 5 years ago from northeastern US Author

mdl,

time to find a good dentist. they're out there. bad teeth can affect your overall health, not to mention the pain you must have. get thee to a dentist!

thanks for voting.


diogenes profile image

diogenes 5 years ago from UK and Mexico

DO NOT TALK OF TEETH!!!!!!!!!1

Just saying. Bob


cathylynn99 profile image

cathylynn99 5 years ago from northeastern US Author

sore spot, Bob? sorry.

thanks for reading. originally it was just the story, but got unpublished as too short, so I added the part in parentheses. hope it's not too off-putting.


Just About It profile image

Just About It 5 years ago from southern CA

Scary! That is one way to get a kid to never come back to the dentist or brush their teeth ever again!


cathylynn99 profile image

cathylynn99 5 years ago from northeastern US Author

lol, jai,

mostly not serious. don't tell your kids. thanks for reading.

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