Drug of Love

Source

Love Drug

You strut across the bar

As if we should all know who you are

With your gorgeous blue eyes and blonde hair

You act so debonair

So you lock your eyes on me and make your move

Your enchanting words beg to woe

But I am immune to your charms

Until you hold me in your arms

I stare into your beautiful face

My heart suddenly begins to race

You kiss the my neck’s nape

And then it’s all to late

This can’t be happening to me

I promised I would be free

But I am an addict to this drug

And the drug is LOVE.

Inspiration

As a young girl I found people who fell in love to be irrational. I found love for a lack of a better explanation to be a form of insanity. And yet oddly enough I couldn’t explain why so many people around me suffered from this form of mental illness. I was certain that there would be a cure like there is for Polio. And one day we would all get a shot and be over it.

But until that day came I was never going to fall in love. I would never allow myself to fall into the same delusions which people suffered around me. And I fought it all through High School and I poured myself into my studies and into refining myself.

The better part of my life I have been avoiding falling in love because I believe it to be a biochemical process in our brains that has an anthropological explanation more then an actual phenomena. I know that isn’t very romantic but that is how I have felt about love for the majority of my life. I am not guard just rational which again is not very romantic.

When we are in love our brain gives off certain chemicals which makes us believe we are happy. It is really that simple. Love is a biochemical phenomena in the brain. I am as certain of this today as I was when I was a child. And all of us have tendencies to be romantic fools. So again I have tried t spare myself this humiliation. While Shakespeare might have thought it is better to love and lost he wasn’t exactly referring to one’s mind which often goes in states of bliss.

So I have been dodging that bullet my entire life. I am only abnormal in my behavior in that I am a female trying to dodge that bullet. Men do it all the time and no one bats an eye. They call them “Confirmed Bachelors”.

And as much as I have rationalized never falling in love and never letting myself be bound to love. I have a child. So apparently I got the love drug unintentionally along the way. And yes, I was irrational at the time as well. Fortunately I can report I have made a full recovery and will never ever fall in love again.

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Comments 8 comments

Lord De Cross profile image

Lord De Cross 5 years ago

Come on! 3a.m. in here and you said never ever? Oh well your point of view is solid as gold...not cold just rational enough not to fall again..like you said you did..only once, unintentionally. You made me laughed JT!

lord


JT Walters profile image

JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida Author

Hi LORD,

No really I never ever intended on falling in love quite literally. But I am glad I made you laugh.

Thanks for reading and comenting friend,

JT


SimpleGiftsofLove profile image

SimpleGiftsofLove 5 years ago from Colorado

Really? It is better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all. Thanks for putting things in a different perspective, so I could consider the possibility that will never happen. I choose love, and happily hurt to oblivion! Great hub! Up, interesting, and following!


JT Walters profile image

JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida Author

Hello SimpleGiftsofLove,

Well I am happy you are embracing love. And thank you and I am following as well.

JT


Max Havlick profile image

Max Havlick 5 years ago from Villa Park, Illinois

As you admit, JT, your education has a few gaps. Last I heard, however, anthropology was real, biochemistry was real, even mental illness responds to real-life factors and events, so personal love cannot be delegitimated on grounds that such things are too remote and unrealistic to be taken seriously by serious people.

You embrace a theory of "full recovery," yet your wonderful son results from your one experience with love (however naive and misguided it might or might not have been), and you indicate often that your son is still the strongest, or one of the strongest, organizing principles in your life.

Some people are "late bloomers" in work and career, some in art and science, some in love. You don't have to be foolish, naive, or hormone-driven to keep your eyes open for possible loving relationships.

Please don't give up on yourself, JT, you are a very interesting and talented woman, and as worthy of genuine love as anyone else. Remember the old saying, "For everyone, there is someone" (and UNESCO now says we have 7 billion someones out there!).

Max


Fennelseed profile image

Fennelseed 5 years ago from Australia

There is nothing at all rational about love, not one thing and on the surface you sound like a very rational person - except, ah ha!!! - you penned this beautiful romantic unrational poem about fighting off loves drug AND losing the fight. I am hooked on this drug but oh boy there are times when I wish I had your rational mind!!

Thank you for this perspective JT, I enjoyed your hub, my votes to you.


JT Walters profile image

JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida Author

Hello Max,

My son is my focus every single day. The only time I was even remotely unfocused on him was when I was caring for two years for my terminal Mother.

But I am a rationale person and the odds of marrying with a child with autism and a rare biochemical disorder in which the marriage would not take from my son are extremely remote even with 7 billion people out there in the world.

Funny I think Anthropology is a psdeuo science along with psychology perhaps because they are too abstract for me to comprehend.

And yet I am completely loyal to my son. Not a day goes by in which I do not strive to be a very good parent to him. He finds my parental ambitious as a parent to be exhausting. And I stayed with my Mother for those years in which most people could not have made it a day.

I will not give up Max but I will let go. And if I do find love then it will be a wonderous miracle and if I don't then I will not be disappointted.

Thank you for the encouragement you are a very generous man.

JT


JT Walters profile image

JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida Author

Hello Fennelseed,

Yes, I had a moment of insanity and now I have a beautiful son. You are hooked are you? Love is perhaps the best drig there is and it is very addictive. I just can't be a slave to a habit. I have my son to think of first and I am an exceptionally loyal person.

Always awesome to hear from you.

Take a double helpong of love for me okay?

JT

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