Five Thoughts in 85 syllables

Allen Ginsberg
Allen Ginsberg | Source

A Brief History of the Haiku

The Haiku is an ancient form of poetry that originated with Buddhist monks in Japan. They are generally 17 syllables and 2-4 lines. The subjects are primarily around nature with images that contradict or juxtapose one another. The traditional format for the poem is this:

5 syllables

7 syllables

5 syllables

Some American poets, like the late Allen Ginsberg, have written haiku's in seventeen syllable, single line sentences. That's what I've done here. These are more thoughts then poems, but they're all 17 syllables, so, with a loose interpretation, they're haiku's. Enjoy!



Five Thoughts, 85 syllables


I wave my finger at you because I’m angry that you are driving so slow.

***

Enjoying fresh oranges, the goat doesn’t see the wolf pack looming.

***

Skin for fish and scales for man, how do you like a hook in your throat?

***

With no rhythm, the man is dancing without shame, because he loves her.

***

If paper comes from trees and trees come from God, then where does God come from?

***


all rights reserved. Copyright Justin W. Price, November 3rd, 2011.

Thanks for Reading.

PDXKaraokeGuy, also known as Justin W. Price, is an author with Sweatshoppe Publications, which will soon re-release his poetry collection, Digging to China. Additionally, the managing editor at eFiction horror and The New Bridge online newspaper. Husband to Andrea, father to two dogs. writer.poet.baseball fan. tattooed. He is am amateur theologian with a rabid sweet tooth. He resides in a suburb of Portland, Oregon.He has a poetry book available for Amazon Kindle, and also maintains a blog, FirstBlog. His work has been featured in the Crisis Chronicles, efiction Magazine, The Hellroaring Review, the Bellwether Review, eFiction Humor, and the Rusty Nail. Please visit his profile page for more information. Thanks!

More by this Author


Comments 50 comments

PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 3 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks so much, Kimmie. Send me a link to some of yours, if you have any :-)


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 3 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Audrey.... I had fun with these. I'll have to work on them again and make some more!


Sunnie Day 4 years ago

Hi Justin,

I love Haiku's, my favorite in fact! Thank you for sharing your creative poetry. I think I like the fish one best!

Merry Christmas my dear and talented friend,

Sunnie


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 4 years ago from California

Glad to see this--as you know, I enjoy the shorter forms!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks Marcy. I'm glad you enjoyed my work. Makes it eeasier to share it :-)


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thank you, Echoe. I'm pleased that you enjoyed this!


Marcy Goodfleisch profile image

Marcy Goodfleisch 4 years ago from Planet Earth

Haiku is a great art form. These are fun - interesting hub! Thanks for letting us see your work here.


echoe0021 profile image

echoe0021 4 years ago from Conway, AR

That was nice, very entertaining


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Hawkesdream, so pleased I inspired you. I'm glad you liked these. Thanks for stopping by and reading.


Hawkesdream profile image

Hawkesdream 4 years ago from Cornwall

The imagery that you have created with these haikus is amazing. I have never tried writing them, but I will. You have inspired me.


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Oh, thanks Tammy. I'd forgotten about this one. It was fun for me to read it again!


tammyswallow profile image

tammyswallow 4 years ago from North Carolina

This is one of your most creative ones. I like this poem.


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks, LInda. That's very important to me!


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

I truly like the way you think! Your thoughts are unique:)


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

I agree, Mark. I like that it forces you to be brief and concise!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Victoria, I appreciate the share. I'm glad you like this!


BakerRambles profile image

BakerRambles 4 years ago from Baltimore, MD

I loved it haikus always offer the deepest meanings. So much to think about. Thank you so much!


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 4 years ago from Arkansas, USA

Wonderfully creative! You create a great description in your 17 syllables. Love this! Voted interesting, funny, awesome, beautiful, and up, of course. Sharing it with others, too!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Danger, there are so many great poetical forms we need to experiment with. What i like about Haiku is it forces you to be concise!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Cyndi, they were. Certainly. And I'm pleased that you enjoyed reading these!


Fullerman5000 profile image

Fullerman5000 4 years ago from Louisiana, USA

great work. i need to try this out. i forgot about haikus. thanks for the reminder


Cyndi10 profile image

Cyndi10 4 years ago from Georgia

Those must have been fun for you to write. They were great fun to read.


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Seek N Find- let me know when you've completed that list. I'd love to read what you create!

Sunnie- thanks so much!


Sunnie Day 5 years ago

Wonderful once again..I loved them..Thank you!

Sunnie


Seek-n-Find profile image

Seek-n-Find 5 years ago from Illinois

You've just added another topic to my "to write about" list. Thanks and great job. :-)


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks Tilt. I'm glad you found this useful!


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 5 years ago from New York

So much said in so few words. Again you educated! Often we don't see the wolf pack coming either. Voted up.


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

That's a great analogy, Penny. Great comment!


pennyofheaven profile image

pennyofheaven 5 years ago from New Zealand

Kinda leaves you hanging...like there is more to be said...kinda like a tear struggling to free itself. Very interesting. Thanks


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Shanaya, I like Haiku because it forces you to be brief, yet show very strong images. You should give it a shot.

Jha, Let me know when they're done. I'd love to read them!


jhamann profile image

jhamann 5 years ago from Reno NV

I hopefully will have a few Haikus to share soon, I have been working on some about my family...Thank You for sharing!


shanaya profile image

shanaya 5 years ago from Living in my Own Dreams:)

Hello PDXKaraoke! I didn't know very much about 'Haiku Poetry' but I enjoyed your Hub. Will surely wanna know more about this. Thanks for sharing with us.

voted up, interesting.

with lots of Respect

from SHANAYA:)


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks for saying so Carlon. These are not traditional haiku's. the key is finding the right words. Since you're stuck to a rigid structure, each word counts. Give it a whirl! I'd like to see them!


Carlon Michelle profile image

Carlon Michelle 5 years ago from USA

I remember studying Haikus in school and being so very unskillful and creating one. You however have no problem. Great job. Smile!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanks Sue, and it's so true!


Sueswan 5 years ago

"With no rhythm, the man is dancing without shame, because he loves her."

This one is my favourite.

Voted up and awesome


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Thanksd for taking the time to read, Flora. It's funny where that thought came up, because I'm a pretty carnivorous person


FloraBreenRobison profile image

FloraBreenRobison 5 years ago

I enjoy Haiku poetry. As for the thoughts you share, the third one is brutal. How indeed?


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

@ Mar and Gypsy: Thanks for the visits and the comments!

@ Debby: Thanks! I'll keep up the good work if you keep appreciated it. Deal?

@Ardie: absolutely. There's no need to be self defeating. Do it. There's no way of knowing you can do it until you do it.

@ Cogerson, I agree. It's great to be entertained and informed!


Cogerson profile image

Cogerson 5 years ago from Virginia

Very nicely done...great thoughts as well as a great hub that explains some of the principles of poetry....hubs like this are why I like HubPages so much....entertaining and educational all at once.


Ardie profile image

Ardie 5 years ago from Neverland

Thanks for the encouragement! I will indeed try my own and then just hold it close. Or burn it if its REALLY bad ;)


Debby Bruck profile image

Debby Bruck 5 years ago

Hello Justin. I also have that same problem of lexiadys and it appears out of nowhere when we are stressed. Keep up the good wroks.


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon Author

Debby, I think you are correct and I corrected my blog. I think I was suffering from a mild case of lysdexia :-) Thanks for stopping by.

@ Ardie: Thanks for saying so, but why not dare? Who knows what could happen. NO one has to see it, and it's a fun way to force yourself to concise, visual images.


Ardie profile image

Ardie 5 years ago from Neverland

This was so much fun to read - but I'd never dare to write one of my own :) You are so talented!


Debby Bruck profile image

Debby Bruck 5 years ago

My dear Justin ~ I may be wrong but the Haiku that I have been writing for so many years is in the form of 5-7-5 syllables for each line. Is this a form of which I am not aware? Blessings, Debby


marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 5 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

Love that crazy cadence! Voted UP & FAB, mar.


Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 5 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Enjoyed readin this. I love haikus.


mary615 profile image

mary615 5 years ago from Florida

I've never really understood haikus (how could I make that word plural?) I think I understand, now. Thanks.


Derdriu 5 years ago

PDXKaraokeGuy: What a thoughtful update to an ancient form: a haiku made up of a series of haikus! The thoughts build on each other to a philosophical crescendo, in the rhythm of which the fourth is so endearing.

Thank you,

Derdriu


Vinaya Ghimire profile image

Vinaya Ghimire 5 years ago from Nepal

I love haikus and I have done couple of haikus on hubpages. Thanks for sharing these beautiful compositions.

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

    Justin W. Price (PDXKaraokeGuy)742 Followers
    229 Articles

    Justin W. Price, AKA PDXKaraokeGuy, is a freelance writer, blogger, and award- nominated author based out of Portland, Oregon.



    Click to Rate This Article
    working