Father or Sperm Donor?

Introduction:

He barges in to my room like Zeus always a tyrant

One wrong word and I’ll be slapped in an instant


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You haven’t been around for the last past seventeen years

Barely know my face and weren’t there when I shed tears

An expansible stranger in my life, yet on my soul has a negative effect

You showed me no honor, Used and abused, cursed and showed no respect

Like dust silenced in a corner you displayed us your goods on a shelf

And for 17 years I bit my lashing comments kept them to myself

Pardon me for my brashness or what you call sacrilege

But I’m done with your bullshit it’s driving me off the edge

Your sight makes me want to shred myself to microscopic pieces

As once your words cut through my skin as you called me feces

Not more than the executioner’s role  you played during my short life

With words so poisonous like a whip showing no mercy lashing like a knife

To you I was blind misguided and stupid. Once you called me a donkey

You spat in my face criticized the way I saw things called me a monkey

Father? Do you even know who I truly am?

Do you know what’s it like to be part of a fam?

I don’t remember having you as a supporter honestly

So no you didn’t act your role right in this family

We never asked for money only peace so what’s the fuss?

So stop living for yourself and for once give a damn about us

“Go to your room you miserable piece of shit! Damn you!

Don’t say another fucking word don’t speak until spoken to”


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I wondered endlessly how many times the razor will cut through

And fortunately only two in the world know about it so few

Though I share half my genetic code with you,

I’d be damned in the depth of hell if I shared with you a common trait

I swore to God and the pearly gates that my children won’t suffer the same fate


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So tell me are you tired of playing dress up, oh pretender?

Coz a jack of all trades is a master of none, so surrender!

Surrender to the fact that you only act like a sperm donor  

A selfish self-centered person never wanting to be a father

And all what I have to say after all these bitter years

One little piece of wisdom I learned after all these tears

A damn leopard never changed its darn skin

So little dreamer surrender you hopes in


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Comments 4 comments

ralwus 7 years ago

Stop torturing yourself dear. I think maybe you have by writing about it in such a powerful way. Razors edge? meh


Uriel profile image

Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon Author

i think so myself...but writing helps it out...:D


thanglynn07 profile image

thanglynn07 7 years ago from Long Beach, CA

You are very expressive with your words. I can feel the anger in them. You can practically weigh it...if it can even be lifted to any known scale. I'm so sorry for the pain and anger his absence has caused you. And you are right, he has no right to play father after being absent for so long. Especially through the transition of childhood to adolescent. That is a big chunk and the most important transition in everyone. Aside from adulthood but that consequently can reflect on your adolescent years. When you're a teenager you have raging hormones, no fear, you're more impetuous, too quick to act upon your emotions. It is the time when you struggle most to control your emotions before they run wild. If not guided by an adamant loving figure...you can easily fall off track. I remembered my teenage years...oh so long ago lol. Every little thing cuts like a knife. My tempers threaten my very sanity. I acted solely upon my emotions without completely thinking things through. I never stepped back to look at the big picture. 17yrs of your life ur father wasn't there? Those are the most crucial years. I hope he had a good explanation on his absence. But nonetheless dear Uriel writing is very therapeutic. And you do it so well!


Uriel profile image

Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon Author

thanglynn07, you are so right. The transition between childhood to adulthood is crucial . It is a character builder. We learn to make choices in life and learn all about the consequences. yup it is a complicated situation here but i think it is now for the better. I think i became the unique character i am just due to the absence thing. ANd i believe everything will be for the best in the end !thanglynn07 that you for your support!

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