Flower Poems for Dirty Minds

Don't blame me
Don't blame me

Flowers

Eros rules the world. Humble poet, striving to represent the true nature of things, hidden truths only discoverable through a series of lies we call 'metaphor, I consistantly hit up against the dirty, dirty reality: Eros rules the world.

In few places, however, is the dominion of Eros so powerful as in the world of flowers. Meretricious creature, the flower wafts its perfumes and flashes its pretty dresses to lure bees and birds into its embrace. Promiscuous flowers summon anything and everything to have their beastly way and leave with some sweet nectar for the trouble. So pollen fills the world.

Look at how many plants there are and ask yourself, "Who put them there?" Other plants, ever busy at every moment spraying seed, seed so thick your asthmatic aunt gasps for breath is who put them there. Rabbits and ants are shamed by the mighty reproductive force of flower-kind.

So oozing with the Power of Eros that we give flowers to our women to get them to the bed. We toss flowers onto graves to remind ourselves, "Life goes on; you may be dead, but seed continues." Flower, flowers, dirty flowers: they look like the bits and pieces we cover, sticking up, bulbing, opening and closing, secreting and depleting, flowers are the most obscene things on the fair planet.

What is a poet to do? Tell the truth.

Orchid

Heat mists local airs, readies your stamen,
The tsetse marveling your velamen,
Which awaits the dripping from above
Honey dripping from above
Gold, sweet, from above.
The thunderbolt and Mighty Zeus
Concocted, dictated, you're either a-
Drinkin' or a-bathin'--
Juices divine so seldom leak;
Enjoy the tinkle: life's love's peak.

Orchid Reading

Chrysanthemum

Cultivated irregular incurve
Welcomes the boorish caterpillar's verve,
The soft, pink skin wrapped 'round the disc
Contemplates an ecstatic trip
To the cherubic heaven bliss,
Consuming from center to lip.
And angels and archangels chant
Of holy fate for this girl's plant.

Tulip

Strung about trimery merosity
Perrennial's bulb's animosity
Is fixed by stolon, crossing wet sepals;
Transfixed in scape stems, blooming soft petals.
From mountainous Boreas masked
Infectious nematodes are asked
Restraining, cuffed to porous soil.
Empollened air rewards the toil.

Tulip Reading

Lily

The lily stigma swept with style.
The blowing of humid winds
Sought tears from pinkish eyes, questing
Melancholic, the Earth's lap.
Fair Science could coax this bounty,
A splash of seed upon the grave.
With the knell of parting day
Eros retires and leaves the world
To dark productivity.

How do you feel about flowers?

See results without voting

Comments 39 comments

Jane Bovary profile image

Jane Bovary 6 years ago from The Fatal Shore

The ""boorish caterpillars verve""...ha. I'll leave the bulk of the praise to epigramman but I think these are wonderful....and you really look like a poet too.


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Ah, Jane, my little hibiscus, thanks for dropping by. I do kinda go bohemian in these videos. At least I left the fedora out. That would've just been repulsive. Glad you liked the poems.

Cheers!


carolina muscle profile image

carolina muscle 6 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

You really do look like a poet... and you do great work!!


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 6 years ago from TEXAS

SO! This is what they meant by "flower power" in the 60s! OR - is it strictly the result of encouraging genius basking, especially - sniff, sniff - the unfainess - why can't I vote affirmatively to all four of your querries?

Oh, my! But I've truly enjoyed this romp! You did hit the stamen on the heads! Good grief! How did flowers ever make it through customs or the old Hays Office censors? To think that the Discovery channel is ENCOURAGING wee children to be exposed to all this overt eroticism! There ought to be an INVESTIGATION!

Lilies are surely the most aggressive offenders too - with their wanton ways. Then they're hypocritical too! They are so mashisimo, they'll inscribe their lily-bet scarlet letter on any passing white T-shirt if the wearer gets even slightly too close - ! And inscribe it with permanent lilynk! (is there something amiss in "slightly too"?)

Of course your poems and video readings are the best treats, although I detect a bit of reticence to let us see & hear your full Shakespearian delivery when you're fully exposed as yourself. (that didn't sound quite right, did it?) Anyway - it was very effective and yes, best done fedoraless.

Thanks for great good fun,AW!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Mr. Muscle,

Thank you, sir! Coming from a fellow poet, that's high praise.

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Nellie,

You're correct that there was some reticence to expose myself in the videos. Not for the reasons you might think. I normally do audio/video recordings when my neighbour is at work. The old doors and small hallway separating our apartments are far from soundproof, you see. Since I was over-eager to publish this hub, I did the recordings last night while she was home. Consequently, I restrained myself a little so she wouldn't hear me thundering about trimery merosity. The orchid video must have gone through at least a dozen takes before I was satisfied with the sound and look. Had I been doing it louder, she would have really wondered what the hell is going on in here. hehehe But I would have liked it to be more dramatic and unrestrained. Ah well. I'll do better next time, I guess. At least I made people look at one of my feet. hehehe

There ought to be an investigation. And for this investigation we'll need lots of beautiful, voluptuous models stripping in flower beds. Research requires it.

Thanks for the comment. Glad you enjoyed these little poems. I can tell you really GET what flowers are all about. The message spreads. You're my first disciple. Tell the world.

Cheers!


SilverGenes 6 years ago

If Emily Dickinson had mated with Georgia O'Keeffe and had the result stamenized by Rudyard Kipling, it would have resulted in Arthur Windermere. The hands through the hair were particularly pornographic. Excellent, wonderful, marvellous and very, very naughty!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey SilverGenes,

haha Way to introduce the image of Emily Dickinson and Georgia O'Keefe in torrid embrace. I'll keep that one on file. Rudyard's stamen, however, will be conveniently left out of the picture.

Thanks for the high praise. Very naughty indeed. Cheers!


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 6 years ago

Well Arthur you have shed a whole new light on flowers,caterpillars, bees and the birds. You were just a humming along minding your own business like a poet normally does and voila, the skirts were lifted up and you got the whiff of the flowers perfumes and nectar. Eros came out and cast his spell of orgasmic delight and you became a drugged euphoric flower peddling romantic.

I must say fedora or none, the bohemian look suits you. I remember the time in the 60's when my hair was nearly as long and my beads around my neck went well with my tie dye tee. Flowers were popular with us Hippies back then and the wild wood weed was a particular favorite, it to had and still does have a wonderful smell and heady euphoria. Thanks for this share, I felt the flower power.


Mike Lickteig profile image

Mike Lickteig 6 years ago from Lawrence KS USA

I've already had to adjust my thinking about chimps and ducks, and now flowers, as well. Nothing in nature is safe from your scrutiny!

Not trying to steal your thunder, I have actually considered putting myself in a YouTube video for a hub or two, and I might be encouraged to try someday--although you might have set the bar too high. I would lack your sense of drama, but I've always wanted to interject something different into an HP hub. We shall see....

So, chimps, ducks, flowers.... What's next?

Mike


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey saddlerider,

lol "the skirts were lifted" - that's a great way of putting it. One wouldn't have to guess you're a poet yourself.

I missed the '60s, but layabout longhair that I am, I'd have fit in very well. And hey, flowers like me.

Maybe we can see the North American Longhaired Saddlerider in a future hub, huh?

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Mike,

hehehe hey, I can't help it if Mother Nature is a dirty hussy. I think insects have it coming. They're next.

Please, think nothing of it. I don't have a copyright on video-production. In fact, since hubpages prefers we not use copyrighted material (without permission), I believe user-created videos and pictures is expected. Admittedly I've never seen anyone other than me do the video thing, though. Oh wait, I think DJFunktual does it. He has videos on youtube. Anyway, I'll be keen on seeing a Mike Lickteig video.

I've been thinking of different experiments that could be done with the hubpages format. Multimedia hubs is one area I'm exploring now, as here. I've also been thinking about collaborative hubs. While there's no system for co-authoring on hubpages, something could be figured out, I'm sure.

Cheers!


CMHypno profile image

CMHypno 6 years ago from Other Side of the Sun

Smutty flowers? You certainly do have an interesting mind Arthur! Interesting flower poetry - sex and death are always the two big sellers in life.


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

my god Arthur if I had hair like that I would be getting laid every night!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

I love how you incorporated these videos into your work which proves one thing - you are now the current rage on You Tube - a rock star who could out Jovi Bon Jovi - and a performance artist par excellence!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

you are the reason why someone like me is inspired to keep writing and also the hope that one of your fellow groupies will take a shine to me and end my dry spell once and for all.

You mentioned the other day about spilling your milk - well I bet you must own a dairy farm!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

you are a gift to the rest of us here at hubpages as we slave and toil away in the banality of our seemingly endless dull normal minds .....


Randy Behavior profile image

Randy Behavior 6 years ago from Near the Ocean

Lovely to trip over you this evening. I've been thinking about the flowers as of late. The hot sun their aphrodisiac. Flouncing their colorful skirts unadbashedly, spreading their pollen on the summer breezes seeming not to car where it lands. The cheeky things.


Steele Fields profile image

Steele Fields 6 years ago from drexel hill,pa

You're like a reincarnation of Jim Morrison

Tripping out in someone's garden.

The "dirty" feel stems (pun) from your choice of verbs

But it's really just your way with words.

The rest is painted in stark relief

LIke poetry made from a Georgia O'Keefe.


McHamlet profile image

McHamlet 6 years ago

Now there's a hub; magic stuff, great energy and spunk flowing in the floweriest of language. And attitude to boot. Nice one. I'll be flowering your, uh following your work with interest.


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey CM,

The poet's eyes are innocent, his mind a sheet of white. Nature, however, is filthy and constantly spraying its seed all over my fresh sheets! Back to the laundry, like a prostitute on a Sunday morning.

But seriously, serieusement, thanks--I do have an interesting mind. Keeps me occupied, at any rate.

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey epigramman,

hahaha you're my biggest fan, but I'm still not gonna sleep with you, sorry.

I do have my hair and I'm not getting laid every night. If any ladies want to help me out with that, just send me an email and a photo. I'll see what I can do. ;)

But seriously, thanks for the kind words. But if I'm an emerald, I'm amongst diamonds, my lovely readers like yourself.

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Randy,

Truly, there are brothels in Singapore that take lessons from the flowers. Kind of a zen thing. I'd love to read their koans.

Thanks for dropping by.

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Steele Fields,

A comment in verse! How sweet. Thanks for that great compliment. Really lights my fire. ;)

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey McHamlet,

Thanks for the kind words. Magic and spunk--sounds like backstage at a Siegfried and Roy show.

I'm honoured to have you following me, sir! As for flowering me, that might draw a restraining order.

Cheers!


rasenstars1 profile image

rasenstars1 6 years ago

I have sent your url to my mother. Her favorite flower is the chrysanthemum. Hee hee. I loved your work. The flowering of young women, and deflowering of brides leds me to say that your verse is very true.


McHamlet profile image

McHamlet 6 years ago

Backstage at a Siegfried and Roy show, haha, love it')


the pink umbrella profile image

the pink umbrella 6 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

Arthur- hey, im back. My power was out for a whole 6 days. Funny, because the storm that hit was only in my town for about 20 minutes. Then again, i could cause much more damage in much less time.lol. Anayway, awesome hub as usual. I love that you recite the poems via video, then again i love preformance art. So, loved it. And im thinking you could find the perversion in pretty mych anything you come across! hahaha. oh and by the wasy...i say let your neighbor hear you...id love to imagin her ear to the wall with a look of wtf?! on her face!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey rasenstars,

Thanks for the kind words! Yes, English colloquial metaphors have long grasped that flowers are dirty, vaginal things. Or that vaginas are pretty flowers. I guess it depends on how optimistic you are. haha

Cheers!


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Pinkie,

By strange coincidence, I was also gone for the last 6 days. My mom visited for five days, then I needed a day to recuperate. Hard work taking care of guests. Especially for a committed slacker like me. Anyway, glad to have you back--I did in fact notice you weren't around and was going to send you a note asking what's up.

What? Me FIND perversion? I'm just an innocent, angelic poet who is constantly assaulted by the perversion of Mother Nature. You buyin' this? hehehe I feel a hankerin' to make another poetry hub and my neighbour's currently home, so that may be coming about very soon.

Cheers!


the pink umbrella profile image

the pink umbrella 6 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

Do make sure you speak up while you are reciting, and let us know if she looks at you strangely at the mailbox!! I have to say...not to flatter you or anything, but im absolutly in love with your hubs. Out of all of the hubbs that i follow, yours is the first page i go to when checking up on my fellow hubbers.


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Well, trying or not, consider me flattered. You could totally have your dirty way with me right now.

But seriously, thanks so much. Glad my articles amuse you and glad to have you as a friend.


the pink umbrella profile image

the pink umbrella 6 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

hoping the zombies attack soon......:)


tom hellert profile image

tom hellert 6 years ago from home

Good hub but I still hate poetry...


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Tom,

Poetry is the surest key to unlocking Nature's dirty secrets. How can you hate that?

Cheers!


the pink umbrella profile image

the pink umbrella 6 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

Tom- you didn't hate my most recent poetry...;)


Loveslove profile image

Loveslove 6 years ago from England

Cough Cough !! I love my garden and now after reading your wonderful poems look at the flowers in a completely different way !! Thanks for the insight ...love it XX


Arthur Windermere profile image

Arthur Windermere 6 years ago Author

Hey Loveslove,

A lady talking about her garden on this hub is potentially very dangerous. ;)

Glad you enjoyed the poems.

Cheers!


Lena F 4 years ago

Lovely! But it left me wondering why did you "stealth read" them as if you were worried that some people on the other side of the wall might hear you reciting poetry...

:-) Just go for it!

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    More by this Author


    Click to Rate This Article
    working