For I am not real, I am who you are

Life is what you believe it to be, but the key to understanding it is that you must keep living

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Things may never be perfect-and I may never get over all the hurt...but I am not looking for perfection---I am just looking to feel whole.
Things may never be perfect-and I may never get over all the hurt...but I am not looking for perfection---I am just looking to feel whole. | Source
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Kept at a distance, as regards to who I am


For I am not real,

I am who you are,

I am never close,

But I am rarely too far.



Kept at a distance,

As regards to who I am,

I am not with you,

I am lost in your hands.



A summer’s last wish,

A winter prayer,

A spring time kiss,

Do things ever become clear?



Fall out of site,

I fall into forever,

I keep them at a distance,

Living within shadows.



No room to lose,

I struggle to trust,

No longer an option,

I become what I must.



It is not real,

What you pretend to show,

I live for the future,

A future I do not know.



I know that I am here,

Here I will lie.

I lie within my heart,

To continue to survive.



I am still not sure if I have ever been seen.

I know that it isn’t you so it must be me.

Trust my heart?

I don’t know that I can.

My heart has betrayed me,

I'm afraid of what it has felt.



You say this is no way to live.

I giggle and turn away,

What do you expect?

What do you want me to say?



No one has cared-at least not for real.

I have never been the first choice.

Or someone others took time to believe in.



Surviving has cost me plenty,

Plenty of life still left to lose.

I won’t be lost in forever,

Because forever has no rules.



I will have a say in tomorrow,

Tomorrow is saved for me.

A service that won’t cost any money,

But a service that isn’t free.



I must not be real

Can I please change?

I'm tired of paying,

And I am tired of pain.



If there is a payment

and I must pay up the cost

I guess it makes sense

that I am the cost of all I have ever lost.



Of all that I have lost

It isnt you- so it must be me

Easy for you to say

When I am the one who bleeds.


Because I believe we all probably feel this at least once in our lives....

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It is okay to be a little nervous when beginning something new, but read you must... and you will be better for it!

 
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Comments 22 comments

youmeget profile image

youmeget 5 years ago

Beautiful poem.

Thanks for sharing.

youmeget


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

This stretches boundaries. A remarkable feat in this day and age.

Voted Up and beautiful.


Richieb799 profile image

Richieb799 5 years ago from Cardiff, Wales UK

Hey hun, I like this one, the lyrics express some suffering but the overall picture and images at the side show a hope or place of untold refuge


aware profile image

aware 5 years ago from West Palm Beach Florida.

Another great hub.

Ray


Cagsil profile image

Cagsil 5 years ago from USA or America

Hey Holly, I'll agree with Aware- another great hub that is excellently written. Believe it or not, Life is easy, people make it complicated. It's a quote I created and live by. It's worthy to appreciate yourself and to find that happy comfort zone where the heart and mind are in balance. Always a pleasure to see you producing more writing, because I continue to watch you as you grow in the person you choose to be. Just remember, it's your choice and ability to create your future. I believe in you and my faith in you does not waiver. Thumbs up. :)


A.A. Zavala profile image

A.A. Zavala 5 years ago from Texas

Surviving and enduring forges us into the individuals that withstand anything. Creating prose from those experiences is like writing a hymn; solemn. Thanks again for sharing.


tom hellert profile image

tom hellert 5 years ago from home

HC,

good stuff way cool pics I digg it.

th


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

youmeget- Thanks for the comment, I am glad you liked this poem :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

mckbirdbks ,

Thank you so very much for the wonderful review of my work- I am so happy that you liked it and I truly appreciate the kind words... You just made my night! :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Richieb799 ,

Thanks you-for stopping by! I need to go visit your hubs soon, I have unfortunately fallen behind on my reading due to work... I appreciate the comment and am happy that you liked the poem :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

aware- as always, thanks for reading and commenting, I appreciate you taking your time to follow me :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Cagsil-Thank you for your insight and views of the world... glad that you shared :) and thanks for the comment and quote... here is my addition to your advice (quote)

"life is too short to have anything but delusional notions about yourself" :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

A.A. Zavala- thanks for the sentiment... very wise, you are!


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

tom hellert

Which is a good thing- :) glad you enjoyed the poem and the pics...


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

Beautiful and I am pushing all the buttons on this one.

Take care

Eiddwen.


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Eiddwen

Thank you so much for the continued comments- I am so happy that you enjoyed this :)


Plarson profile image

Plarson 5 years ago from Alabama

H.C.- I sit here, 2 months nearly behind on reading my hub pages posts and following some of my fav writers. Seems the world I thought was so well put together, had a weak link, the other person. Many of the lines of this poem have hit home. An while I might not like the cold truth of the matter, or having to admit the truth, I found some easing of my internal suffering and pain in the realization, that others have felt the same and I can find strength in their writings. -Paul


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Plarson (Paul)

Thanks for reading, and I am so glad you can draw some strength and some hope from something that i have written. The great thing about life is it is always changing, as we are always changing- we all have bad and lost moments, but the sun can shine again. I hope you are doing well and that you have found a little bit of hope...because others have been where you are and have survived


Canscorpion profile image

Canscorpion 5 years ago from Steel Town

The most beautiful thing about poetry is that it presents feelings in a way most people can relate to it somehow. Some find solace in it, for some it evokes hope and strength.

Yet another great piece of writing by you- touched my heart! :)


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

Canscorpion- Glad you stumbled across this one. I must say, if someone ever sat down and read all of my hubs (poetry in-particular) they would certainly get a glimpse into my world or feeling and thought. I am glad that I am able to portray myself in such a manner that people have been able to relate to. I hope I inspire more so than invoke solace. Thanks for yet another encouraging comment.


vasantha  T k profile image

vasantha T k 5 years ago from Bangalore

nice hub and neat pictures.


H.C Porter profile image

H.C Porter 5 years ago from Lone Star State Author

vasantha t k- thank you for the comment- I am glad you liked this one :)

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