National Humor Month Funny Short Joke Number Eighteen

Marilyn Monroe
Marilyn Monroe

National Humor Month Funny Short Joke Number Eighteen

You may remember that I promised in an earlier foreword not to show favoritism or partiality with these jokes, but to offer equal opportunity humor. In other words, these funny short jokes make fun of or insult . . . everyone!

Funny Joke Number Eighteen

Tom was a good-looking guy but he couldn’t seem to find the right girl. Tired of the bar scene, he went bowling one night and met Jerri, a very attractive young woman who resembled that famous movie star, Marilyn Monroe.

They seemed to have a lot in common so he invited her to dinner and after an expensive meal and a few drinks, she invited him home.

Mutual attraction took over and they spent a long night together. Completely satisfied, Tom felt like smoking a cigarette. He found them in his jeans but his lighter was missing. So he asked Jerri if she had some matches.

"Take a look in the top drawer of the bedside table,” said Jerri. “There might be some matches in there.”

Tom opened the drawer and found a box of matches next to a framed picture of another man – a very handsome man. Naturally, he began to feel anxious.

"Is this your husband, Jerri?" he asked nervously.

"No, of course not," she replied, snuggling up to him. “I’m not married.”

“Well, is he your boyfriend then?" Tom asked.

"No,” said Jerri as she gave Tom a loving hug, “I am unattached.”

“Your brother, perhaps?” said Tom trying to understand.

“No, Tom, I don’t have a brother.

Completely bewildered, Tom demanded, “Then who is this guy?"

Calmly, Jerri replied, "That's a picture of me . . . before the operation."

Funny Quote

“You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.“ – Albert Einstein



"Some Like It Hot" 1959 with Marilyn Monroe, Tony Curtis, Jack Lemmon and Joe E. Brown

Footnote: This was one of the funniest films I have ever watched. The last two lines are hilarious. Jack Lemmon, dressed as a woman, says to Joe E. Brown who has become attracted to him, “I’m a guy.“

Joe’s brilliant response: “Nobody’s perfect!”

© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2012. All rights reserved. Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So"

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Comments for National Humor Month Funny Short Joke Number Eighteen 50 comments

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Don't know why but I sorta saw that one coming :) Good joke on Tom.


jainismus profile image

jainismus 4 years ago from Pune, India

hahahahaha..............


always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

HeeHee, Another GREAT joke..Enjoyed the ' Some like it hot ' video. Keep em comming...

Still Smiling..


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Great joke


Feline Prophet profile image

Feline Prophet 4 years ago from India

Moral of the story? Carry your own matches!! :D


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Very clever, Susan, for you to see that joke coming. Do you think my subliminal use of Tom and Jerri (Jerry) may have helped? It was a good joke on Tom but I don't know if he was laughing.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

What can I say, Janisimus, but thank you to the fifth power for the ha ha's.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Wasn't that video, great, Ruby? One of my all-time favorite movies. Delighted you are still smiling. I promise to post at least two more jokes making a total of 20. For the time being.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thank you, Becky. 'Great joke' is music to my ears. Too bad Tom may not agree with you.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

That's a perfect moral, Feline, dear. If Tom carried his own matches, there could have been a 'rematch.'


Wayne Brown profile image

Wayne Brown 4 years ago from Texas

One of my favorites I must say! You have great taste in humor! LOL! WB


christopheranton profile image

christopheranton 4 years ago from Gillingham Kent. United Kingdom

So long as they both had a good time does it matter?

Good joke and a great film.


Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 4 years ago from United States

That would be shock! Good joke and video.


prasetio30 profile image

prasetio30 4 years ago from malang-indonesia

I can't stop for laughing. I also enjoy the movie though it's too "HOT" for me.....hahaha, just kidding. I wish I could see Marilyn Monroe in my dream. Well done and voted up! Take care :-)

Blessing,


dahoglund profile image

dahoglund 4 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

This one surprised me. With this sort of thing in the news lately it shouldn't have.


mary615 profile image

mary615 4 years ago from Florida

Wonder why "she" kept the photo in her bedside table? Maybe she wishes she were still a guy??? Oh, well, I am just too literal, funny joke though. I watched Marilyn Monroe in Bus Stop the other day, and I couldn't help but remember what a great actress she was. People didn't give her enough credit.


xstatic profile image

xstatic 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

Funy one alright!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

This is why one night stands stink! Up and funny!


Paradise7 profile image

Paradise7 4 years ago from Upstate New York

I didn't see it coming, and laughed my socks off. In a way, the guy got what he deserved.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thank you, Wayne, delighted this is one of your favorites. You, my friend, have great taste in comments. :)


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

You are so right, christopher, to each his (or her) own.

Thanks for enjoying the joke and the film is funny every time I view it.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Yes, Pamela, an experience like that could provide a bit of a shock. Delighted you enjoyed the joke and the video.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, pras, hope you have stopped laughing by now. It could affect your health. So the movie is too 'HOT' for you? I don't believe it for a minute. Marilyn Monroe was something special - she left us far too soon. Thank you for the up, my friend. Have a great weekend.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

So this one surprised you, dahoglund. Then it was a success. A really good joke should always end with a surprise. And your observation was spot on - the times they are a'changing.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Maybe, mary, Jerri kept that photo because she received some sort of vicarious pleasure from surprising a bedmate. Although 'surprise' may be too mild a word.

I remember the film, 'Bus Stop,' and it was one of Marilyn's best. She was great in that movie. And I believe you are correct - she never received the praise as an actress that she deserved. Her 'sex goddess' image got in the way.

Thanks for enjoying the joke, m'dear.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, xstatic, thanks for finding this one funny. Since you have, then I've done my job. :)


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

You are so right and for so meny reasons, bp, one-night stands should not be the norm. Thanks for your profundity. And for the funny and the Up!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Thanks for laughing your socks off, Paradise. I guess Tom will be more reserved in the future. Then again . . .


anndavis25 profile image

anndavis25 4 years ago from Clearwater, Fl.

Oh, ha ha ha ha. If you hadn't commented on one of my hubs, I wouldn't even know about these jokes. I wonder why they didn't come across my email! Does the Hubs filter who gets what? Anyway, Now I get to go back and read the others. A smile a day. Thanks, drbj.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

I'm so glad you found me, Ann. Now that Hubpages doesn't send email notifications of new hubs from hubbers you follow, you have to go to your statistics page and click on "Following." Then "Hubbers You Follow." That's what I do. Thanks for the 'ha' times four - providing the smile is my pleasure.


teaches12345 profile image

teaches12345 4 years ago

Oh my! You certainly had me fooled -- didn't even guess the ending.


barbergirl28 profile image

barbergirl28 4 years ago from Hemet, Ca

Ha ha - that is too funny... I was really starting to wonder! Great... I am laughing so hard.. I am getting funny looks! :D


RealHousewife profile image

RealHousewife 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

Hilarious! I totally didn't see that coming! lol It has been a long day but that was a big LOL! I am so glad barbergirl28 shared it - how the heck did you get to #18 on me?


Alastar Packer profile image

Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

Drbj I've come to the conclusion that your interviews and funny short jokes are amongst the most enjoyable reads on HP for me and that's no joke; but the joke sure was on poor Tom. A one night stand man's worst nightmare!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, teaches. So this was a 'gotcha' for you? Makes my day, m'luv.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Stacy, sorry you are getting funny looks from laughing so hard at this joke. Next time, read it privately. No, I take that back. Laughter is more fun when it's shared. Right?


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Kelly. Delighted you found this hilarious and that I could provide both a Gotcha and a big LOL.

Now that HP has changed their system of notifications, the easiest way for me to find what is being published by the hubbers I follow is to click on 'Following" on the statistics page. Works for me.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Alastar. You are so right - that one-night stand was not Tom's finest adventure.

What a gracious compliment that you find my interviews and jokes among the most enjoyable on HP. Thank you. I appreciate you, your visits and your superior comments.


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 4 years ago from USA

Good Doctor bj - Now I REALLY do owe you. Thanks.

Gus :-)))


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Dear Gus, With the enjoyment I get from reading your hubs and your comments of approbation, the score is more than even. In fact, I think it's tilted in your favor. No thanks are necessary. ;)


QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 4 years ago

Holy crap!


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Hi, Qudsia, I couldn't have said it better myself. Heh, heh.


psychicdog.net profile image

psychicdog.net 4 years ago

Drbj - how unfair - we never know if Tom got his matches. Poor Tom. Do you know? Does he get to smoke his cigarette? Waiting...to find out...


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Forgive my keeping you in suspense this long, psychicdog, I had to wait for an email response from Tom. Yes, he did get his matches and smoke his cigarette . . . later!

Now the unanswered answer to the new question you may have is . . . yes.


Petra Vlah profile image

Petra Vlah 4 years ago from Los Angeles

My very dear drbj,

I knew exactly where to come when I needed a good laughter. With your sense of humor you have no need for matches to start a fire


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida Author

Sweet Petra, what a thrill to hear from you. Where have you been and what have you been doing? Have sorely missed you, m'luv. Think of you often and wonder how you are doing.

Delighted to provide you with laughter and if you need more smiles, there are 19 more short funny jokes for you to catch up with. As well as 26 Interviews that I believe you, with your discriminating sense of humor, will enjoy. So good to have you back. Hugs.


Mitch Alan profile image

Mitch Alan 3 years ago from South Jersey

Saw the punch-line coming, but read it to the end... and glad I did, because of the "Some like It Hot" tie-in. Great movie that many in my generation and younger have never seen. Keep Hubbing.


drbj profile image

drbj 3 years ago from south Florida Author

Wow, Mitch, you saw the punch-line coming, and still you read it to the end. That IS a compliment. Delighted you enjoyed the 'Some Like it Hot' tie-in - one of the funniest B&W movies ever made. And being older than soil myself, I know what I'm talkin' about. Thanks for finding this and I will Keep Hubbing. Promise!


Rolly A Chabot profile image

Rolly A Chabot 3 years ago from Alberta Canada

Hi drbj... oh my that would scare any man... lol...

Hugs from Canada


drbj profile image

drbj 3 years ago from south Florida Author

You got that right, Rolly. Thanks for the visit and hugs backatcha. Hope it begins to warm up for you soon up North.

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