Go the Distance

Go The Distance

I was always determined not to be a coffee drinker after I watched my mother be coffee's unapologetic slave my entire childhood. I wasn't about to let that happen to me. I was above coffee. I planned to get my boost of energy from determination, from inside myself. But during nursing school, I learned that my insides really needed coffee.

There are some who swear that coffee has absolutely no effect on them. They drink it for the taste, or to be social, but don't notice any change in how the feel. They don't notice any jitters, any boost of energy, it might as well be juice to them. Now in the eyes of someone like me, these people HAVE to be part alien, because for me, coffee literally alters my mental status. I become freakishly awake, my lips can not keep up with my words, words that are tripping over themselves to get out as it is. Suddenly, everything is so very important, and I, and I alone, am just the person to get it done.

Now most of my friends knew at the time that I began to drink coffee that it really did effect me--strongly. Rather than advise me to slow down, they were thrilled with the results, and, like a group of bad kids on an after school special, introduced me to espresso. I understood the path of the junkie then. Coffee was just the gateway drink to much harder things. After my first shot of espresso, a straight shot, I found myself researching medical schools, because now, with my trusty espresso, I was going to be a doctor. An irrational, and spastic doctor, with beads of sweat on my forehead, but a doctor just the same.

When I told my mother, in Tazmanian-Devil-like fashion, that I was off to a medical school in Missouri, because I could finish it in just 40 months, she just shrugged, and told me to talk to her when the coffee wore off.

"But I haven't had coffee! I had espresso!" I declared. I wondered what was making her think that I'd had coffee? What was it that had given me away--the involuntary twitching?

After a good night's sleep, I realized that being a nurse would suit me just fine. It wasn't long after that, however that in addition to my crack-like energy, I developed rapid, and irregular heartbeats after I'd had a "few too many." A medical doctor was the one who told me that I was okay, but that I was going to have to take it easy on the coffee, and myself. I wanted to slap him. Didn't he know that the coffee was my driving force? It was my super-power, and this antagonist was trying to take it away from me?! I wasn't having it. I decided right there that I was going to go the coffee distance. That even if it meant only drinking coffee at the local hospital, or near a defibrillator, or carrying one of those special alarms that senior citizens get to wear so they can call for an ambulance when they needed it, I was NOT going to stop drinking coffee. I decided that my doctor probably was a spy working for a tea company and this was definitely a conspiracy in which I was NOT about to have any part.

But I'd just had coffee before I went to see him. What did I know?

Comments 19 comments

lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca

I KNOW JUST WHA...WHA...WHAT YOU MEAN, SJ!!!!!

I need another cup-be right back!

:)

Great hub,

Thanks!


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Cool!! Enjoy, and thanks for reading!


AARON99 6 years ago

Wonderful piece written. You have so much talent. Keep it up and keep writing. Enjoy.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Aaron, thanks a lot, i laughed writing this. It is a reminder to myself of how crazy i am, in case i forget.


logic,commonsense 6 years ago

A fun hub! Thanks for sharing! I was addicted to Mountain Dew!


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

logic, commonense (two of my favorite things, btw), this was fun to write, and, mountain dew we'll kill a person also. See ya at the hospital!


always exploring profile image

always exploring 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

I see that we are in the sane profession, I worked as an R.N. for many years. I drank my share of that good old black gold.

enjoying your hubs.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

hi always exploring, thank you, and it's great to meet another nurse! You have many stories to tell also, then!


karenmc419 profile image

karenmc419 6 years ago

How on earth could I have missed this one?! I am (was) one of those "it doesn't affect me" people. It was just nice to have that warm cup of comfort in the morning until...

I had my first experience with Pete's coffee with a group of good friends very early in the morning. Everytime I drink it now, I try my best to act normal but it is like I floored the gas pedal on my brain. The brakes for my mouth no longer work...I cannot SHUT UP and pretty much bouncing off everything. It is a sure thing that witin minutes I will have my own personal summer even in December. I thought I was beyond its reach but alas, it is my meth amphetamine. Great story Shannon. You nailed this one perfectly.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Hey Karen, thank you. Coffee and I definitely have a pretty dysfunctional relationship, and I'm always happy to share that news! I think I can guess who are among the "Pete's Elite" that you've been drinking with. I have been slightly MIA lately from almost everything lately. Just when I think I'm busy, something else comes up. Attention Deficit Disorder is one very interesting little affliction to have. Keeps me guessing. BTW...your comment was very, very well said...if I didn't know better, and I hate to throw accusations around, I might just call you a writer! I think I might be seeing the little writer in you starting to peck its way out...my deepest sympathies.


karenmc419 profile image

karenmc419 6 years ago

Shannon...LOL!!!! You may just be rubbing off on me a little bit. I understand now ya have to right about what you know. I might just know a little bit about coffee. I was off the hook this morning girl...I even downsized my cup and it didn't work. All of us...Karen T, Valarie and I. Nobody could finish a thought or sentence without someone elses coffee turbo blast kicking in and interupting. After the 2nd hour Valarie left and the two Karen's :) joined M Scoggins and my motor stalled. Since I was on empty, I quieted down. Dare I go for round two?? Anyway thanks for the snaps...I will leave the writing to you. You are so much better at it. Take care and have a wonderful day.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Sounds like a great day! Of course, everything sounds like a great day to me when I have to be stuck in front of this life-sucking computer. Hiking, the beach, doing studies, out with my friends, cleaning the house...even yard work, and I never do yard work, sounds better to me then this right now. I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit as a writer, and as far as my own writing...once again, I'd exchange it for shoes. I really miss Valerie, and Karen, and my west coast Dad over there! Tell everyone hi for me, and drink your Pete's close to the hospital, will ya??


karenmc419 profile image

karenmc419 6 years ago

Oooooooh...shooooooes. I passed your info onto Val and she said thank you very much. I will make sure we will have a coffee moment of silence just for you the next time we walk into Pete's :) Because there will be no moments of silence AFTER we take that first drink. I will tell them both hi. I went back and read some of your other stories while I was online yesterday and have this overwhelming urge now to make (Ick!!!) tiramisu!!!!! So I have been drawn out and enticed by my own desire and it is about to become fertile (oops...multi tasking with my bible reading)But I doubt this will make me sin hahaha. Point being, it is time to make that desert that you hate so much. Maybe I will try a trifle. Got any stories about that? I am sure you will try it and give me one. Ok...I am rambling. Thanks again for all the pleasant reading time. I love it!!


Lita C. Malicdem profile image

Lita C. Malicdem 6 years ago from Philippines

Oh-oh, don't ever ever lure me into this coffee hostage- drama! Been off for quite sometime now due to diabetes. But the way you talk about coffee and your way of washing it down- might want to go for one, cup, too. Yayyy! Just the smell of it! I had fun, SJ! Thanks.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Lita, thanks! I had fun writing this. Coffee can definitely be a life saver slash life ender. Your fan mail was really, really sweet, thank you.


kittythedreamer profile image

kittythedreamer 5 years ago from the Ether

looooved this hub. i used to be a one-cupper but have now turned to coffee to get me through the morning. very funny and amusing, as always. you know what though? i can't stand espresso! :)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Thanks, Kitty, I drink it off and on these days. I like to take a break from it for a week or so and then feel its full power over me again after the break. Spectacular! Thanks for reading.


Apostle Jack profile image

Apostle Jack 5 years ago from Atlanta Ga

I love that title.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Thank you for stopping by, Jack~

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