Greetings From Shady Oaks
To: Tom Edwards
Attachments: funnybunny.doc, laughingdog.doc, catstring.doc, charliebitmyfinger.wav
So much has happened since your last visit. As you can tell, my new computer is all wired in and I'm beginning to get the hang of the emailer. I have made many friends in the facebook and have exchanged humorous mail with people all over the world.
My Nigerian friends are very pleasant and accommodating as I have been helping them through quite the dilemma. With my help, hopefully the prince can access the money that has gotten tied up in several bank accounts. Poor guy, he just needs an account to store it in. For my trouble they have agreed to give me a share! Of course I gave them everything they need., account numbers, phone numbers, even my personal address should they ever be in town and want to catch up. Now I just sit back and wait.
I have also become savvy on the whole internet thing. I had become quite the forwarder , sending emails of funny pictures with captions, or cute little pictures of animals. I passed these on to everyone in my address book, spreading the love far and thin as we like to say. I have attached them to this message, I think. Most of them have warnings to those who refuse to not pass on these inspirational messages to others, warning that they must not believe in God or don't love America. Can you believe that?
Which reminds me, Reverend Vernon came by to visit yesterday, he spoke of the shortage of funds at the church, and how they weren't sure if they were going to be able to go ahead with the Christmas production. I wasn't about to let that happen, I gave him a generous donation that had him smiling all the way to the bank.
Oh yes, I am the proud new owner of another bridge, this one in California. There was that bridge in Brooklyn that I bought years ago, if you remember that bargain, the one I was unable to find it on my last trip up to New York, being so awful with directions. Let’s see, then there is that star that I named after my first grand-baby, and that oceanfront property in Cuba.
I have a new financial investor that I met with last week. He’s privy to all sorts of information and has a knack for the market. He’s allowed me to be a part of a select plan that only his most trusted clients have access. The plan promises high returns that are virtually impossible to receive through traditional plans. I'm no expert but I've decided to invest my retirement fund, so my dividends are sure to be a windfall. The man is a genius.
So now I can sit back and wait for the money to be deposited in my account, and then I will share it with friends and family that need it most. The rest will go to charity, as that would be the right thing to do. It still astonishes me the amount of money those nice young men are giving me just to use my accounts. It’s comforting to think that there are still plenty of good people out there.
And the good fortune hasn't just been coming my way. For instance just yesterday two nice men showed up on Edna's doorstep and warned her about her old roof. They were willing to put a brand new one on for just the cost of materials. You can imagine her surprise as she fetched her check book and promptly sent them out to get whatever was needed for a new roof! They should be back to start tomorrow, how’s that for luck?
Wouldn't you know it, I just received a phone call informing me that I had won a limited offer vacation for four. Get your bathing suit ready, I’m taking you, Julie, and the baby to Myrtle Beach! I had to act immediately so I gave him my credit card to hold our spot. How exciting! I should go play the lottery! :) (Smiling face)
As you can tell, I'm doing just fine so there is no need to worry. I do worry about you though. All of that business travel just isn't safe anymore, I've seen on the news all about the dangers on the airlines and train stations, so please try to stay safe and be careful who you trust. Hopefully after all of these investments pay off you won't have to work at all anymore....LOL (Laughing Out Loud).