He hurts me. (a poem)

He hurts me.


I hide my face

so you can't see,

just exactly what,

my husband did to me.


My eyes that were green,

now are red and blue,

all I did to deserve this,

was fall in love with you.


I shake with fear

when you're around

Afraid to talk

Or even make a sound.


He once was so loving

I thought he really cared

I thought it truly was

true love we shared.


I can't run and hide

no where to go,

there were the black eyes

I didn't want to show.


I cower now ,

from the one I loved,

what used to be kisses

are now replaced with shoves.


I'm afraid to anger him

so I try to please him.

Just praying, hoping the beatings

will be slim.


I am worthless to him,

A possesion he owns.

he can beat me if he wants,

As long as our true lives are never shown.


I don't love him anymore

he beat it out of me,

I no longer want to want him

To hide things people can't see.


I left my abuser

a husband he was not

I'm no longer his punching bag,

thats not what I was taught.


Love should never hurt

it should be a happy thing.

My biggest mistake

was wearing your ring.


I'm glad I left you now

my lifes a better place to be.

With you not in it,

I'm happy to get to just be me.


* Abuse is NEVER ok. Please seek help and call someone, go to someone. I know if I didn't I'd be dead today. you see he shot himself right in the head! If I hadn't left we have no idea if I'd be alive today.Please stop the pain and Run. Yeah you may have to hide in a shelter at first, but there are programs to help you leave easily. They will provide you so many resources I didn't have. Back in my day we didn't discuss such matters. they were over and forgotten. Never to be spoken of especially to an outsider in the family.

******** Ladies THE FIRST STEP IS THE HARDEST FOR SURE. I PROMISE IF YOU TRULY WANT OUT, WAIT UNTIL YOUR ABSUERS NOT THERE AND CALL FOR HELP. THEY WILL HELP YOU AND YOUR KIDS HIDE,WHILE YOU START A NEW LIFE.BEST OF LUCK TO YOU, PLEASE GO BEFORE YOU GET KILLED AND /OR TOTURED. YOU ARE NOT WORTHLESS. BEATING YOU DOWN KEEPS YOU IN YOUR PLACE. IF HE WANTED YOU AND SO BAD HE'S AFRAID YOU'LL LEAVE, HE KNOWS YOUR BEAUTIFUL AFTER AWHILE, YOU BELIEVE THESE HORRIBLE THINGS ABOUT YOU. MY DAD SAID IT ALL SO I END WITH THIS QUOTE MY DAD USED TO SAY "IF SOMEONE LOVES YOU,THEY WON'T HURT YOU EVER. THEY WANT TO PROTECT YOU FROM HURT NOT INFLICT IT".



Ruth mccollum

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What do You Think? 16 comments

word55 profile image

word55 3 years ago from Chicago

A wonderful poem. Now you are free!


Born2care2001 profile image

Born2care2001 3 years ago from Asheville NC

This saddens me Rusti, and I too, am glad you chose to abandon being molested in favor of making a life worth living. A also agree with some of the others commenting that you should continue writing, to be a voice for those who are not yet strong enough to act on their own.

Happy you are now part of the HP family.


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 3 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thankyou. My message was if someone loves you, they don't want to hurt you or see you hurt. they want to protect you. I agree only cowards beat women and only witches beat men.


amandaines 3 years ago

fantastic poem and I know what it's all about. I'm glad you found a 'proper' man to spend the rest of your life with. Strong men don't have to prove anything, it's only the weak that 'shove' their women around.


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thankyou for taking te time to read my poem. Thankyou to for the nice comment. I'm so glad that part of my life is done. It was part of my lifes journey. I learned no one has the right to hurt me or hit me. If someone loves you they want to protect you not hurt you.


D.Juris Stetser profile image

D.Juris Stetser 4 years ago from South Dakota

Very poignant and sad - how terrible it must've been before you left . I had several similar episodes, but the kind of abuse that was ongoing for me was the psychological. some men can zero in on a woman's vulnerabilities and jab over and over into that target. Sometimes constant verbal cruelty can also be so vicious and painful....This is just beautifully done. thank you for your bravely sharing this with others.


xstatic profile image

xstatic 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

Great advice and a real lesson in how to get away and the need to do so.


Angela Brummer profile image

Angela Brummer 4 years ago from Lincoln, Nebraska

Amazing admitting poem. I have had some bad men myself that I feared for good reason.


Virtually Bored 4 years ago from Ireland

This is a very emotive piece. You should never stop writing because there is obviously an inner strength in you, which you need to voice. You'd never know who you might influence. Be safe and be happy. God Bless you and keep you safe from all harm. (I'm an Irish well wisher and a married man. We're NOT all like him and hopefully you'll find your soul mate.)


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Iam so sorry for what you had to endure. Sad thing is you feel helpless. As a child I remember just Terror. Watching mom come at me mad, you ust know this is gonna be bad.My heart goes out to you.


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thankyou all so much, I don't have much self esteem when I write. So I just let my heart do the talking.


alocsin profile image

alocsin 4 years ago from Orange County, CA

Thank you for posting this. I'm hoping those suffering from the same kind of abuse will gain the courage to escape because they respond to your poem on a level that straight prose cannot evoke. Voting this Up and Useful.


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Thanks friend. I'm so sorry what you endured..Thats a horrible thing you endured. Know you are stronger than you think!Best wishes my new friend. I'm so so sorry. I know I went thru you know what, but I came out Stronger, More self esteem,my pride,I hated myself for being weak. Until one day I looked in the mirror and decided to take MY life back, if what he said was trueand i was so ugly no one but him would want me,SO BE IT!!!!I'll live alone. I took the kids and ran like hell!


Rusti Mccollum profile image

Rusti Mccollum 4 years ago from Lake Oswego, Oregon Author

Sue I love you so much my friend. You always are so good to me. Hugs


SUE LUKING: YOUR FRIEND 4 years ago

RUSTI, I AM SOOO SORRY U HAD TO GO THROUGH THIS ABUSE..YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON AND FRIEND....GLAD U GOT OUT OF THERE!!


Cresentmoon2007 profile image

Cresentmoon2007 5 years ago from Caledonia, MI

I am glad you got away. It is very difficult to speak out about what has happened to you. I know it's not the same but I was physically and sexually abused by my father and for many years it took me nearly ten years or so to tell my mom what my dad was doing to me. Voted up. Great poem.

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