Holy Cow!

A long time ago

 

Hé I'm Dutch. And who can tell you more about cows than the Dutch. Oke, maybe there are some people from other nations who can tell you something about the cow too, but the holy cow?

Did you know that the first holy cow ever seen was in the Netherlands? It all started back in the 16th century. In the 16th century, there were just cows. Imported from Switzerland and Australia. Ore stolen, who cares.

A Dutch farmer got his hold on some cows. He and his seven sons started breeding them. But son number 7 had a problem. At least that‘s what his father told him. Not a drinking problem, like most farmers had, no; this son had a different problem. He fell in love with one of the cows. Probably caused by smoking the marihuana he was growing illegally, but who cares. He fell in love. People in the village started to talk about the strange behavior of son number 7. And they made it difficult for him to hide his feelings. So he ran away and took his lovely cow with him.

He went to the west. And at the beach, he and mss Cow had long walks. Normally spoken, that wouldn't be a problem. Who cares if someone wants to walk at the beach with his cow by his side to see the sunset. But there was a problem. That problem was the English. They found it necessary to start a war at sea with the Dutch. You know the drill, big boats with sails, big cannons and big cannonballs. And back in 1653, these were really big cannonballs.

While son number seven, Mr. Cowlover was walking with Mss Cow on the beach, he saw that two big boats were shooting at one another. It was a great scene. Something that Gore Verbinski could use in one of his Pirates movies, but he wasn't born yet and this wasn't the Caribbean so...

Back to the English at sea. They weren't the best cannonball shooters (they didn't lose that war for any other reason, duh) .Some stupid blind Englishman fired his cannon the wrong way. The soldiers on the Dutch boat started laughing. Instead of shooting at the Dutch boat in front of him, he shot towards the beach were Mss Cow was a nice target.

She got hit. Right into one or two of her stomachs. She instantly fell down on the beach, letting go all of her milk, but she survived because of the gentle care by son number seven. The English were astonished by seeing the cow standing up on her four legs and leaving the beach, supported by her caring and loving farmer boy.

Since that time, everyone spoke of the holy cow. And now, every time something astonishing happens, you hear people say: "Holy Cow!"

Say cheese!

More by this Author

  • TRUE LOVE FOREVER
    2

    Today it is an important day. Claire is running through the living room, cleaning everything, putting everything back in place. Somebody is coming to visit her. A very important someone, because it's her boyfriend....

  • The mystery of the disappearing underwear
    18

     Suspecting nothing I always hung my clean wash to dry outside. Every day, but the last months there was less wash to hang outside. Strangely enough there was always something missing, so after a few weeks I had to...

  • Hormones and love
    44

    Do you know why you feel so euphoric when you’re in love? Why you feel happiness when you’re with your love? Do you know what happens in your body and how you can influence this all? Well I’ll try...


Comments 5 comments

Ananta65 8 years ago

So "holy" actually comes from this hole? Sometimes things can be sooo simple :)


Lazur profile image

Lazur 8 years ago from Netherlands Author

Yes indeed Ananta. I love those simple things(a)


indian 6 years ago

ahhh ahhha ahhhhhhhhh :-)

Lazur you are really cute.....

holy cow !!


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

An unique and brillaintly written hub. I vote up and am looking forward to reading many more hubs by you.

Take care

Eiddwen.


Trisha 21 months ago

Damn, I wish I could think of soethming smart like that!

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working