How to Survive A Zombie Attack ( Tips And Tricks)

The Beginning

What's the scariest thing that could possibly happen? An asteroid hitting the earth? A huge gorilla suddenly jumps from your window? An alien spaceship lands in your yard? The Mafia rushes in your house searching for something you don't know what? Or the yakuza pointing their swords at you?

I know the one's I mentioned are pretty lame because nothing beats a ZOMBIE ATTACK! There are several reasons why they are by far the scariest thing on earth! (if they do walk the earth) First, they won't die because they are already dead! So shooting them in the head is basically not killing them. LOL. Second, they grip hard! Once they grab you, there is no point in struggling because they don't feel a thing and you are seconds away from being bitten. Third, they are so patient. These monsters will wait for you for days, months or years without even sleeping or eating. They are probably the ideal security guard. Lastly, you can be one of them with just a tiny bite! So you will eventually kill yourself or let a friend do it for you before you turn like one of them. Why suffer from such a trauma if you can prevent this from happening? How can you survive a zombie attack?

RUN LIKE HELL!

Basically, there are two types of zombies (as seen on TV and movies). The first one are those that are slow and just walks around the street waiting for a dumb guy to topple around and break his leg. The other one, which is the one you should fear, are those that runs toward their victims. The latter is certainly the type of zombie you wish not to encounter. Nonetheless, if you are in the department store or in the street walking with some friends and you see a zombie killing a random guy, don't just look, RUN! This is the common mistake of many because they are too curious about the fact that zombies do exist. Of course, they are the ones usually eaten next. RUN LIKE HELL! Never look back! It's best to stay with a crowd and treat them as your shields. Stay in the center and look for a safe and closed space. The police station is your best goal but if it's too far, a convenience store or a gun shop are good options as well.

TEAM UP WITH OTHERS

There is no way for you to survive alone. Have you noticed that most victims are attacked from the back? It's a wise idea to team up with other survivors so that someone can watch your back. However, don't just be with a group of cowards. If you want to survive, a group of cops or soldiers is the best. Going with your trusted friends is also a good move because you can be sure that they won't leave you no matter what. Your team should be united in one goal and that is to survive.Plan a formation and assign a certain task for each members by knowing what they are good at. Adrenaline will help anyone be stronger so there is nothing to worry about a member being incompetent. Be brave, unite and together all of you shall live!

DECIDE ON A DESTINATION

After forming a competitive team, you should all decide as to where you plan to go. It is best to watch the television or tune on the radio for this matter. The government will surely spread words about a certain place where all civilians should meet up. If all lines of communication are broken, the best place is the nearest military base. This place is probably the safest so you should aim to get there. However, if the journey is quite long, try to visit police stations along the way. There is a great possibility that there are still survivors there and your team can also get ammunition and firepower along the way. Stick together, work as a team and be extra careful!

STAY AWAY FROM HOT CHICKS

One of the most common scenario is when a guy sees a hot chick from a far. He will probably approach her and offer help but it would be too late till he realize that the chick is a zombie. BAM! Another meal for the hot chick zombie. This is a very important tip! Don't be too confident to anyone you might know along the way because you will never know if they have been bitten. You can let them join but always check on them for some signs of "zombification". Do not approach someone if you can't see his face. You can check still check if he is not a zombie from a far by letting him shout any word. Zombies can't speak so this is a very effective technique.

FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS

Do not be a hero. Let's say your team finally reached the military base. It is best for you to follow every instruction given. What's the point of going all the way there just to act like you know everything? They are the one's in charge and they are much more skilled in combat so its better to let them die for you. LOL. They are the one's who oath to protect the civilians. Just let them do what their duties. However, if the base lacks enough men and they asked you to help out, be willing to do so. They also worry about their families while having their own fears so you should understand if they sometimes manifest some weaknesses as well. The only thing you can all do now is wait. An antidote will eventually be discovered to end it all. If that doesn't happen, just enjoy the rest of your life living in a military base. Who knows, you might even meet a sexy solider or the man of your dreams there.

THE END

I hope this article gave you some helpful ideas on how to survive a zombie attack. If this do happen, I wish you all good luck! By the way, try to exercise from now on so you can run faster.

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Comments 27 comments

Reynold Jay profile image

Reynold Jay 5 years ago from Saginaw, Michigan

Have you seen Zombie Land! FUnny just like this HUB!

I enjoyed this very much. You have this laid out beautifully and it is easy to understand. Keep up the great HUBS. I must give this an “Up ONE and FUNNY FUNNNY FUNNY!” I'm now your fan! RJ

Based upon this HUB, you might enjoy…

http://hubpages.com/entertainment/Tiny-Tim-and-the

http://hubpages.com/literature/Razzle-Dazzle-Part-...


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@Reynold

I am a fan of zombie movies and I have seen Zombieland as well.

Thank you for appreciating my work.

Regards,

Alma


Matt in Jax profile image

Matt in Jax 5 years ago from Jacksonville, FL

Nice Hub! Definitely hope the world ends in a zombie outbreak.


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@Matt

Thanks. That would be awesome.

Especially if an asteroid blasts our world apart after we

all turn to zombies. No pain at all. hehe


Anthea Carson profile image

Anthea Carson 5 years ago from Colorado Springs

Awesome!


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@Anthea

Thank you for appreciating my work. It means a lot to me.


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

......watch out - there are some 'zombies' who prowl and lurk about these very hubpages - lol lol

Love your wit and your irreverence - and I never want to survive any one of your hubs - I just want to fall in love with them .......

lake erie time 10:27am

Zombie movies recommended by yours truly:

Shaun of the Dead

George Romero's Dawn of the Dead (even the remake is pretty good)

You Tube is always a great place to look; just type in zombies/the living dead and see what happens ....

..also one last film, Carnival of Souls, one of my all time favorites (the original one in black and white)

and Robert Wise's The Haunting - the original one in black and white.


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@epigramman

I have already seen Shaun of the Dead and it was freaking hilarious! Can't get enough of that duo so I eventually watched hot fudge as well..xd...but I haven't seen the others you recommended..I'll try if I can download them..Thanks!

Regards,

Alma


Simone Smith profile image

Simone Smith 5 years ago from San Francisco

Hahaa, this advice is top drawer!! I think the stay away from hot chicks point is particularly important. Great Hub, Alma Cabase!!


amanda_swan2003 profile image

amanda_swan2003 5 years ago

ROTFL!!!! I love zombie movies...i would definately pack my place down like fort knox...guns, food, ammo, hot military guys...ummmm...I mean my husband ;) Sounds good to me! Lol The hot chick thing ONE OF A KIND! Great job!


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@Simone

Thanks my loyal fan.xd

@amanda

So guys should stay away from me if i'm a zombie.. nyahaha


amanda_swan2003 profile image

amanda_swan2003 5 years ago

ROTFL! :) Yes definately true...I guess I would starve if I were a zombie...unless I trip on running to the hot chick zombie. LOL


amanda_swan2003 profile image

amanda_swan2003 5 years ago

*one


cocopreme profile image

cocopreme 5 years ago from Far, far away

This advice is great! It is kinda creepy to think zombies can just wait out the humans. I think your first bit of advice is probably the tactic I would be most likely to do.


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@cocopreme

True..that's the best one IMO..XD..so I'm off for some jogging now. Better ready than be sorry. hahah


jaredbangerter profile image

jaredbangerter 5 years ago from New York City

You seriously pick the coolest topics to write about, Alma! Holy smokes! I love zombies. I have just about all of the zombie movies in the world. And you're right -- it would be the scariest thing that could possibly happen, but it would also be the most bad ass! :D I honestly hope we have a zombie apocalypse sometime soon. Would fix everything and I've always wanted to get bitten and turn into one. haha, actually not so sure about that last part, but I would love a zombie apocalypse.

haha and I love the run like hell section. I have been keeping in pretty good shape, so I suppose I'll be prepared to run from zombies, if I ever have to. haha, rated up and awesome.


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@jared

Ahaha..we are on the same boat then.. Keeping in shape for the coming zombie apocalypse..XD...and learning how to ride any type of vehicles and swim too


anglnwu profile image

anglnwu 5 years ago

Funny stuff. Run and don't look back, not even at hot chicks--I'm with you.


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@ang

Thank you for liking my hub..and even hot men..haha

Regards,

Alma


Multiman 5 years ago

Yes, Zombies are the flesh eaters of my choice for being uncomprimisingly just like nature itself. There not evil, they just act and react to cause and effect and fill their tuimmies with yuummy you. Vote up.


Alma Cabase profile image

Alma Cabase 5 years ago from Philippines Author

@Multiman

HAHAHA....you made zombies look cute with your comment..hehe

Thank you for liking my hub! Your hubs are great too btw.

Regards,

Alma


Nefarious_Misery profile image

Nefarious_Misery 5 years ago from on the move

See and I always figured the most important were Low Profile, and always have multiple ranged weapons. Running isn't a plan, that's what you do when a plan fails. I agree with all your other points however.

Voted up and awesome.

P.S. Read World War Z by Max Brooks, gives you a terrifying idea of what the REALITY of it all would be.


ruffridyer 5 years ago from Dayton, ohio

Stay Away from Hot Chick's. That is good advice at all times, not just zombie attacks.


Paul Bisquera profile image

Paul Bisquera 4 years ago from Los Angeles

Great Hub Alma! And like everyone, I liked "Stay Away from Hot Chicks!" Unfortunately, I will not listen to that suggestion. Ha, hah


Nathan 4 years ago

Dude I'm just 11now I'm very scared of the Part that zombies are real I don't feel like falling asleep Any more


cperuzzi profile image

cperuzzi 3 years ago from Freehold, NJ

A good hub.

My only criticism is that you mentioned shooting them in the won't kill them because they are already dead. The common thread through all of the zombie stories is actually just the opposite. Shooting them in the head is EXACTLY how you stop them. (Don't forget: Double tap).

I'm happy that you support the "Don't be a hero - run" philosophy of zombie defense. It's one I whole heartedly support, myself. The best defense is "get the hell out of there".


denden mangubat profile image

denden mangubat 3 years ago from liloan, cebu, philippines

just like zombieland this hub is.

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