How to write nonsense
You may be wondering on what occasion a person would need the ability to write nonsense. You may also wonder, what is there to it? How hard can it be? Other questions that may arise are, what purpose does writing nonsense serve, or, do spaghetti and lozenges read Alfred Hitchcock stories while sunbathing at night?
I will attempt to answer one or more of the questions above, unless I don't.
How hard is it to write nonsense?
Well, there are a few different kinds of nonsense. The easy one is just hitting a bunch of keys and looks like this:
fkjsh iuy9087sdkjvv dkusl
This isn't the kind of nonsense that I am referring to in this hub.
Another kind of nonsense is when you take real words and just slap them together, like this:
boat sink loading frames information sordidly;
This also isn't the kind of nonsense that I am referring to in this hub, though there are moments where this kind of nonsense can be useful.
What I'd like to show you is how to write nonsense where the sentence usually is of a correct grammatical composition and the words generally are used in the correct manner, however, the words put together are not usually combined in that manner. Here are a few examples:
Look! A plaid mole flying through the water, see how she slices that mustard up into thousands of little barrels.
Mexico isn't like a limerick made of suburban kitchen fires.
Kite flying without using one's ankles can be built with exquisitely unkemptness.
How hard is it to write these things? With practice it eventually becomes easier than leap frogging over a poorly tied tourniquet.
How to write nonsense
So how does one actually write nonsense such as this? Take a look around you, look at all of the objects that surround you, give them their proper names like desk, chair, wall, ceiling, flowerpot, monitor, keyboard, mouse, couch and so on. So run through that list of words in your head, pick one and now find an incongruous adjective. An easy way to do this is to make use of how our senses perceive different things differently. So the ceiling is noisy, the keyboard smells like oranges and the desk feels like water. Now look for a verb that can act upon the noun-adjective combination you've just created, the verb can either agree with the noun (the chair rolls, the mouse points, the couch is sat upon) or the verb can be disparate, (the chair points, the mouse is sat upon, the couch rolls). All that is left is a predicate, so repeat the same procedure only this time, instead of looking around you, imagine a different place and look at the objects in that place - for example, imagine you are in a fast food restaurant, or imagine you are in a nightclub, a ski resort, a class room, a shoelace factory or a clinic specializing in excitement deprivation. In the place you pick to imagine yourself, think of the people you might find there, or the objects you might find there and pick one of them for your sentence.So here are some examples given what I've described above as to 'how to write nonsense':
The ski instructor sat upon the noisy ceiling.
The shoe lace factory worker drank the desk.
What purpose does writing nonsense serve
I find that practicing the skill of writing nonsense allows me to exercise my vocabulary as I am often looking to find new words to use in ways that are incongruous with their true meaning. This compels me to look up the word first to know how it is normally used, which helps me to know how to use it inappropriately.
Another purpose is to provide inspiration for other writing. In writing nonsensical statements, and doing so over and over, eventually an idea can arise out of one of the statements written that provides the catalyst for a new hub, a new blog post, a new short story, or a stalemate without intoxicated herrings.
Do spaghetti and lozenges read Alfred Hitchcock stories while sunbathing at night?
On what occasion would a person need the ability to write nonsense?
There is no specific occasion where having this ability really proves helpful, however, if one is needing some form of inspiration to get started on writing something, writing nonsense can certainly help.
One way that I like using nonsense in the form of a question is to exercise the minds of children. With some children I can ask them a nonsense question and that encourages them to try to ask one of me which exercises their imagination and vocabulary.
For further reading, I have been writing nonsense at my blog for quite a while now, you can check out nonsense there.
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