I Have My Fathers Eyes
Little Girls Love Their Daddy's
I would not be who I am...
In the eyes of a little girl,
There is nothing more frightening than being lost in this world.
Father's teach their daughter's to be strong
And show them the difference between what is right and what is wrong.
Without my father, I would not be me.
And although we haven’t always gotten along,
Because of his teachings I have learned how to stand strong.
He hasn’t always done, or said the right things.
But just like being a child, being a parent comes without instructions and a warranty.
Yesterday I learned some news that took my breath away.
My father has prostate cancer and I am lost with what to think or what to say.
I have my father’s eyes, and he has taught me how to see.
When the world tells me I can’t do something- he showed me how to become me.
Although my life has been touched by death before
This is a different pain, which I must endure.
I regret each moment that I have let pass,
In which I didn’t stop to think-these moments won’t last.
The mistakes he’s made are forgiven; they were forgiven many years ago.
I realize his frustrations when he looked at me and said, "I just don’t know".
I have broken my dad’s heart and he said he would let me do it again.
Because that’s what dad’s do when they see that their little girls are lost or frightened.
He told me once; it’s not my job to keep you from making mistakes,
It’s my job to pick you up and help you fix what breaks.
He said I never listen when he has told me no,
And sometimes even when he shouldn’t the only choice he had was to let me go...
And even though I never understood why he was always so tough,
I now know he pushed me, to make me realize all that I am capable of.
I have my father’s eyes-and he has taught me how to see.
I would not be who I am if he didn’t believe in me.
He hasn’t always said nor done the right things.
But he is my father and I fear the day when he leaves me.
-For my father, I love you. Thanks you so much for everything you have taught me, through much of my struggles. Thank you for always scaring away the Boogie Man and The Monsters that I swore were in my closet and under the bed. Thank you for sharing with me your experiences and telling me about Grandpa. Thank you for showing me Photography and letting me mess up your darkroom when I was in High School, and thank you for staying up late with me and talking to me about life, love and the mistakes people make-that we don't have to understand- to be able to forgive. I hope that I can teach my children half as much as you have shown me. I do not blame you nor do I still harvest anger for words spoken in the past. Now that I am a mother, I have come to realize that raising children isn't easy, and you and mom raised five. I know that you have always loved me and I will love you, always.
On Tuesday March 9, 2010, I learned that my grandmother has brain cancer. On March 11, 2010, I learned that my father has prostate cancer. It is Friday March 12, and I wish I was still naïve and didn’t learn so much within those 72 hours.
More Hubs From HC Porter
- A Mother's Tough Love
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- The most horrible mother in the world
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