Political Satire Poem

I want you to own a gun!

However, don't ask for any money for educational programs on the rights and wrongdoings of owning a gun. Whoever said that "owning a gun comes with responsibilities," must have been a lousy, good-for-nothin' Democrat! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!

I want no more immigrants to be allowed to cross our boarders! Damn them all to hell, the nasty Mexican varmints! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want the Lord’s Prayer recited everyday at school! Because remember I am the one who change the $1 dollar bill. In God I Trust…… Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want to make people have to go to a Christian church on Sunday, and I definitely don’t want anymore Muslim bastard’s living in my country! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want women to use crackpot doctors, coat hangers, and poison toxins, while I proceed to tell them what they can and cannot do with their own bodies! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want to be closed minded, working only within my own party! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want the world to hate me, and I definitely think they all should bow down to me! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


'Cause if you remember, instead of hosting “real” peace talks; I believe bombing the shit out of them and other innocence people, is a far better measure! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


More than that however, I don’t want to discuss a problem for additional feedback for solving a problem- I just want everyone to pray to God, and leave me alone while I just sit on my ass and do all the complaining! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want you to forget about the environment. Go ahead drill in the middle of Yellowstone, blow up the damn Grand Canyon- really people I don't give a shit about planet earth so seriously; just cut down all the trees, and scorch the earth and let me do as I please! I just might be making more money for me and my family! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want a nation of ungrateful children, so blinded by ignorance that when I cheat on my spouse, or not pay my taxes- they know to listen to my lies, pat me on the back for my illegal activity; while I have the same American people pay for my personal sex therapy! How about it Republican Senator from Alaska? Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


I want to run a great, vast nation completely in the ground! Just give me the free will to send your children to war; possibly fight my father’s battles for him, and line my pockets in gold! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


When I lie to you, or when something is done and cover up; I want no shit for deleting those all important email or memo messages, remember YOU aren’t supposed to think for yourself! Just take aim, shoot, and FIRE!


Sincerely yours,

The National American Republican Party



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Comments 45 comments

creativeone59 profile image

creativeone59 7 years ago from Gold Canyon, Arizona

Your hub was interesting. creativeone59


Paradise7 7 years ago

You had me scared there, for a minute RK, until I figured out you were being sarcastic.


SimeyC profile image

SimeyC 7 years ago from NJ, USA

I get the vague impression that you're not a fan of the Republican party then!!! *grin*


lxxy profile image

lxxy 7 years ago from Beneath, Between, Beyond

Words..cannot...describe...the humor.

Just a friendly reminder, there's only one party in America my friend--the National Democratic Republican Convention. ;)

So, while this parody is great--it's only one half of the same coin.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Yeah Paradise7- my views are completely opposite of that of my counterparts.

Thanks everyone for reading my political commentary.


IntimatEvolution profile image

IntimatEvolution 7 years ago from Columbia, MO USA

Oh MY! Rush Limbaugh really did tick you off. This is too funny RK. While I appreciated it greatly, I'm sure some fellow hubbers won't be too willing to except the absolute truth. Expect the hate mail to fly. When you hit the nail on the head, and force people to look at themselves in a negative light- they seem to lose all sense of respectful discussion, and always seem to show their ass instead. I found myself looking within- and wondering. I may need to rethink some of my one sided behavior; especially if this is what I appear to represent in someone else's eyes. Great hub! The controversial ones are always the best. Keep up the great work.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Thanks for commenting IE. Your opinion is valued on my block. I appreciate it greatly. Have a good one.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

What would make a good line for their Supreme court picks? Anybody??


fortunerep profile image

fortunerep 7 years ago from North Carolina

I have always said that ignorance is curable. I love your hub and your view. cool.

dori


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Dori, I'm glad to have you on board!

________________________________________________

Nicomp- get a life!! Don't like the reality of your party- well that's too damn bad. Not even Teddy Roosvelet would have approved your Republican controlled corporate heads, getting wealthier off the blood and sweat of the American populace. Remember he was known as the "Trust Breaker" not "Trust Greed". Learned your historical facts before you start spouting about how "great" your party is. Like I said before- this is my hub, not yours! No need to comment anymore. You're wasting your time.


Misha profile image

Misha 7 years ago from DC Area

Yeah, Dems are for screwing America, and Reps would like to screw the rest of the world, too LOL

Come on man, you have eyes and have brains - they all are the same...


Sufidreamer profile image

Sufidreamer 7 years ago from Sparti, Greece

Howdy, RK.

I try to avoid commenting on US internal politics......

....but that did make me laugh :D


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Thanks for stopping by guys. Misha you have a point. However, when a party has lost sight of reality, and the will of the American populace; something needs to be said and done.


ralwus 7 years ago

Dam RK! You scared the hell outa me! I too have changed. Both parties have me pondering my next action. I think I may vote strictly Independent as long as the one running dint run from one of the two major parties. I'm in a quandary actually.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Me too Ralwus. Me too, and now that the Republican party is nothing but a bunch of war mongers, and crack-heads- I'm really worried for our country. They are out of control.


mayhmong profile image

mayhmong 7 years ago from North Carolina

I had to finish reading the hub before throwing a bomb down on it. LOL You got me.


ralwus 7 years ago

Well, maybe someone can start anew. Like the Party of the People, Humans.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Yeah, I made as realistic as it is..., scary stuff! I in know way feel this way, and would never feel like this. Sometimes however, it takes a real kick in the ass from the other side to see what's really going on.

But the crazy thing about it is, all the hate mongering Republicans aren't pissed because of what I said, they're pissed because I didn't mention a damn thing about the Democrats. Can you believe that? Have they all gone piping mad?


ralwus 7 years ago

We are just too polarized RK. Neither side can get out of that tunnel vision thing. My party has hurt me the most, and I had such hopes for us all. Where to turn, where to go? Ach, well hang it all anyway.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Yeah....... I hope so. I think about some of our greatest leaders, and I wonder what would they think of us? Loons and baboons, I tell ya!

That is exactly what they say. Damn shame.

Hey thanks for commenting. Glad to "see/read" you out and around!


ralwus 7 years ago

Thanks RK. I haven't seen you much and was glad to see ya in the forum. G'nite now. I'm off ta bed. peace, CC


IntimatEvolution profile image

IntimatEvolution 7 years ago from Columbia, MO USA

RK, I came back and showed this to my mother-n-law. She said you hit the nail on the head with this one. Great job!


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Thanks IE! Sounds like your mother in-law is in good company.


TerryCSA profile image

TerryCSA 7 years ago from North Carolina

Sounds like you were describing the Democrat Party and the leftist moonbats. Afterall, isn't it they who accuse others of doing exactly what they are guilty of?

Control of everything, banks, industry, manufacturing, insurance.

More insidious laws that they fail to enforce and break themselves.

Tax Cheats.

Gay prostitution.

Telling everyone who and what to believe in.

Yep, I think that sounds like who you were refering to.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Yeah, I understand it is easier to blame the other party, instead of looking into the mirror.

Republican=Crook,liar,cheater,hooker,massacre!!! Greed!!!


tksensei profile image

tksensei 7 years ago

Are you one of those folks who bemoans the divisiveness of society today and responds with even more extreme partisanship?


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

Sparky, the truth hurts doesn't it? Don't blame me for stating the facts. Deal with it.


tksensei profile image

tksensei 7 years ago

So, is that a yes? Just asking.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

no sparky


tksensei profile image

tksensei 7 years ago

So, you don't mind the divisiveness of society today and you are open about wanting to exacerbate it?

As long as you are honest about it. I suppose you realize though that no one but those who share your extreme partisan bias will take your rants seriously. That's fine too, lots of people like to hear from those who are of like mind.

Just saying. Carry on.


nicomp profile image

nicomp 7 years ago from Ohio, USA

tksensei, if a Liberal fails in life, then it's someone else's fault. They have to blame someone; conservatives are simply the convenient target because we didn't give them enough of our stuff.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

You all are so incredibly full-of-yourselves... Pity and a damn crying shame too.


ledefensetech profile image

ledefensetech 7 years ago from Cape Girardeau, MO

Why do you assume that if you support gun ownership you must be a bible-thumping, redneck, hillbilly, damn capitalist?

Isn't that as fatuous as thinking that every liberal is either an elitist in the mold of Al Gore or Hillary Clinton or a welfare baby, crack dealing, gangbangin, minority communist?


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

LED- I didn't YOU just did. Remember I don't assume. So don't mix me up with yourself. Thank you for commenting.


smarleygrl7 profile image

smarleygrl7 7 years ago

To be quite honest I am disgusted by both parties. They are all on a power trip and making choses for the american people that more than half of us do not even want. We call ourselves a democracy but they are running this country like communist. RK, I still have to choose the lesser of two evils so I cannot agree with you and I choose the Republicans. I suppose this is why we vote because we all cannot agree all the time.


ahpoetic profile image

ahpoetic 7 years ago

Guns don't have arms nor legs and can't fire themselves or load themselves. Before guns were used, people usesd knives, arrows, sticks, clubs, rocks, swords, catapults, dug holes, their bare hands, fists and more. Guns aren't the problem; violent people are the problem. People who reject God and commit crimes aganst others is the problem. The world needs to stop focusing on symptoms of evil and deal with the underling motivating force. Sin. Jesus Christ is the only one who can deliver us from sin.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

You Republican by chance?????


Lee Thacker profile image

Lee Thacker 7 years ago

I like the way your brain thinks, makes me feel alive listening to what your thinking, very cool...Keep it up ...PS Now I Know Why I bookmarked your page ;-) ...Hope you are doing well,


Mrs.Nita profile image

Mrs.Nita 7 years ago

I can't choose sides. Republicans, Democrats. It's all the same to me. The bible says in the book of Romans that there is none righteous. The truth is mingled in with lies and myths. For genuine results, the people of America need to stand up for justice and righteousness. But the majority has an every man for himself attitude. First and foremost I am a child of God. My steps are ordered by God, if we all turned to God, wouldn't the world be a better place. I enjoyed your hub. It makes you think.


trooper22 profile image

trooper22 7 years ago from Chicago

The irony is that the Republican Party started life as a Liberal party replacing the Whig party in the national political arena. Then came the dichotomy of "Bull Moose" and finally the 1964 Civil Rights act and voila/Poof/shazam! The Dixicrat assbackwardcats invaded the party of Lincoln and Thaddeus Stevens and created the WRONG wing party a.k.a. the modern Republican Party.


RKHenry profile image

RKHenry 7 years ago from Your neighborhood museum Author

There is something to be said about a man who knows their history. Well said.


Madame X 7 years ago

There are only two kinds of people RK, those who respect others and those who don't. It's not one party over the other for me, just what individuals say and do. Some dems do it for me and so do some repubs. Then again, lots don't! You seem to have corralled all the a**holes into one place though :)


L!ghtzEcho 6 years ago

Polititical Language Is Designed To Make Lies Sound Truthful And Murder Respectable, While Giving The Appearance Of Solidity To Pure Wind, Canidate Trophie Mules Bray Promises Of Contemplated Commerce In Diamonds

And Their Lawyers Scrutinize All Ramifications,Blanketing Municipality's And Greasy Vendors Peddling Their Ware/Houses While Fleecing Citizen's Naked AssEts


honest critic 6 years ago

This is way out of line. In addition some of the same things you could say for democrats such as the cheating on the spouse (Bill Clinton). This whole entire thing is stereotypes of republicans and they aren't even good stereotypes. All of the church and bible related stereotypes are bad because that's not true (I know plenty of atheist people who are Republicans). I mean sure there are Republicans who go to church but there are also democrats who go to church. As for the reading of the bible part, not many people at all read the bible anymore and it's a national law that teachers can not try to push their religious or political views on students. If you're going to try to rip on republicans atleast come up with good reasons. Half these reasons aren't even true they're just bias.


mkent6662 21 months ago

I was wondering if this poem is published in hardcopy. I have a student doing a poetry reading competition and it has to be from a published source, not online.

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