I'm Drowning - a poem

Just a word before I speak... or offer this rather sad poem.

This poem was written at a very low time for me, in early 2010 after we had made the decision to relocate to Western Australia but before we had the means to do so. It was some 18 months after we lost our business at the height of the global financial crisis and I was actually diagnosed as being depressed by our local Doctor. It is presented as it was written at the time, without any fine tuning or other editing.



I'm drowning I'm drowning

I feel like I'm drowning

Out here in the dirt and the dust


My mother, my father made good

In the boom times of past

But it looks like I"ll bust


I couldn't be bothered to get out of bed

Some mornings I don't even show

To check on the ewes that are lambing. Is important I go


I'm drowning I'm drowning

I feel like I'm drowning

It's guilt that I'm feeling, I know


It's still not raining and we're not in clover

I know I'm not out of it yet.

But the blue dog is chained now,

and no longer my shadow


Dags the Drover April 2010




Comments 11 comments

SilverGenes 5 years ago

"The blue dog is chained now..." A simple but very descriptive phrase and I'm very glad to hear he is under control now. Thank you for sharing this very poignant poem, Dags, and I hope the rains have come to you in Western Australia. There are many, many people going through similar things right now and your poem is a little beacon of hope.


Fennelseed profile image

Fennelseed 5 years ago from Australia

Howdy Dags, it's lovely to meet you here.

This is a very poignant poem that you share, and one I relate to after spending some 20 years living on the land on the southern slopes of NSW. Not an easy life, despite perceptions to the contrary.

I hope you are doing well in beautiful Western Australia. Looking forward to reading more of your work.


dags the drover profile image

dags the drover 5 years ago from still lost in Western Australia Author

Hi SilverGenes, nice to hear from you again. You always pop up when I post something a bit thoughtful which says quite a lot about you. Thanks again for your insightful comments and as always, great encouragement. Cheers Dags


dags the drover profile image

dags the drover 5 years ago from still lost in Western Australia Author

Hi Fennelseed. Nice to meet you too. I just popped over to your page and can see I need to take some time just to sit with your contributions. We were living and working for a friend between Parkes and Trundle at the time this poem was written. Southern Slopes eh.. we lived at Yass from 1990 to 1996..so I'm guessing your somewhere west of there? My family is still at Yeoval on 2800 acres. Actually I head for Tomcumwal in the morning and should arrive there by thursday night and be back here Sunday night. Cheers Dags


Cardisa profile image

Cardisa 5 years ago from Jamaica

Hi Dags, Welcome to HP.

As one who has gone through such anguish before I must tell you, your poem describes it well. And the chaining of the blue dog at the end I am glad to hear. Good luck and hope you will be writing something a little sunnier soon.

Cardisa


Nefarious_Misery profile image

Nefarious_Misery 5 years ago from on the move

I hope that you've found the surface. Very moving poem. I think we all know that feeling of being lost and confused, and how overwhelming it can be.

voted up and beautiful


dags the drover profile image

dags the drover 5 years ago from still lost in Western Australia Author

Hi Cardisa, thankyou for your empathetic reposnse. I'm not sure why I didn't post it on hubpages at the time I wrote it. Probably couldn't be bothered I suppose!! Anyway, I happened to find it the other day as I was looking through an old notebook and decided to post it then, and it does describe how I felt at the time. Cheers Dags


dags the drover profile image

dags the drover 5 years ago from still lost in Western Australia Author

Hi Nefarious, Thank you for your encouragement. It was a tough time we were going through, and to encourage you, I want you to know that that deep sense of depression is well behind me now.

We made a clean start. Moved interstate and eventually got a very good job. Which means we have money! Actually it was this week last year that the guy who employed me gave me a start for which I am very greatful.

Thanks for calling by, reading and cheers Dags


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

Hi , I came accross you at Fennelseed's place and I am moved by this one.

There is a saying that I do believe in and that is;

'Something good comes from everything bad !!'

We may not believe this at certain times but as long as we hang on in there and one day we look back and realise that it has indeed occurred.

I look forward to reading many more hubs by you .

Take care

Eiddwen.


dags the drover profile image

dags the drover 5 years ago from still lost in Western Australia Author

Hi Eiddwen, yes I agree that much good can and does come from those hard times. We need to be open that at some point of course. Thanks for your encouragement. cheers Dags


shanmarie profile image

shanmarie 3 years ago from Texas

I love the reference to "the blue dog" being chained. I saw this poem because it came up at the bottom of one I wrote entitled "The Drowning." Your poem describes what so many people have felt after losing out in the financial struggles of the world today.

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