Inane Episode 7

My right calf, once removed, castigated the penultimate arachnid food delivery man for having breached a common trust forged of lint. She did so by enveloping an evening windy flurry in a Reebok shoebox (size M). The box, now repurposed meteorologicaly, remained at rest. My right calf, once replaced, continued to serve in its purported purpose.

Peach punch at brunch or lunch pleases Paul Prunch who had just such a hunch. Deodorant that smells like putrescent six day old vomit is likely not going to sell very well. How one can distinguish the odour of putrescent six day old vomit from disgustingly malodorous four day old vomit is beyond the ken of this author. Ken isn't Hank's cousin.

The inclement dirigible sent up Ken's olfactory passages did not need to remove the emergency panel. This was fortunate, as Ken's smallest toe on his left foot had not been stubbed when Ken was between the ages of five and seven years old. That Ken stubbed all eight of his other toes numerous times between and beyond those two ages is irrelevant, well, irrelevant at least to the fact that orange coloured cubes, when jettisoned from a bowl of frozen yogurt, do not cry out in anguish, longing for shorts.

In a nutshell, very small creatures have a party.

Samsonite luggaged at the airport. Ken was wondering what it means to luggage, but he didn't wonder long as his wondering time slot elapsed. I hate it when that happens.

If the number of sentences in this hub exceeds the number of times Ken balked at sky diving naked.

Now what would an inane hub be without an incomplete sentence? I tell you, composing an incomplete sentence is about as much fun as swinging on a swing to the maximum apogee while almost feeling the need to urinate. I should know.

Guaranteeing obsolescence in a tissue is a method of regurgitating somnolence, evoked by a calamity of visions. Invigorating adolescence is a method of unsavory delinquency, evoked by a malevolent influence. Baking a cake is a method of dessert preparation evoked by a bombastic chef who has a hidden penchant for lukewarm chhena.

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Comments 9 comments

J Burgraff profile image

J Burgraff 5 years ago

Love the fact that your hub rated an "odor shield body wash". What am I doing wrong?


Phil Plasma profile image

Phil Plasma 5 years ago from Montreal, Quebec Author

You have an insufficient volume of dandelion root flavoured ink spots in the cuff of your left third least favourite pair of socks.


Don Bobbitt profile image

Don Bobbitt 5 years ago from Ruskin Florida

Awfully Awesome and Insolently Inspiring! Voted UP! You Prodigious Dog!


Phil Plasma profile image

Phil Plasma 5 years ago from Montreal, Quebec Author

DB, thanks for the vote. I'd have thought my profile photo would have been sufficient to indicate how un-canine I am.


Don Bobbitt profile image

Don Bobbitt 5 years ago from Ruskin Florida

Upon further inspection ....... Whoops!


Paradise7 profile image

Paradise7 5 years ago from Upstate New York

I want to join the small one's party!!! lol. A LOT!


Phil Plasma profile image

Phil Plasma 5 years ago from Montreal, Quebec Author

Paradise, are you sufficiently small to fit inside a nutshell?


Judowolf 5 years ago

Phil. I have an inkling of what Ken is saying, but do not like vomit in any form, nor its odor or looks, thus it seems to me Samsonite luggage has nothing to do with urinating while swinging, chefs are overrated and being inane is fun.

Wayne aka Judowolf


Phil Plasma profile image

Phil Plasma 5 years ago from Montreal, Quebec Author

Judo, thanks for stopping by, that you have an inkling is good; it means you aren't out of ink.

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