Inside a Moment
Bounce from thought to thought. The inner workings of a plagued mind
It's times like these when i never fail to surprise myself. So much anger and frustration is burning inside me just building up on the brink of boiling over yet, i persist trying to keep calm.
That soothing taste on my tongue, the breezy walk to occupy the body, the thundering death metal in my ears...What is it about water that is so soothing to the soul?
The ripples mimmicking my thoughts, so many so close yet each one different. What does it take to calm the waters but patience? The more resistance, the more splashing, the more ripples and waves. It's exhausting.
Things are finally starting to take a toll.
I'm pushing back tears too often these days. I don't even know what i need anymore. The urge to run plagues me.
Like an escape is the solution to everything (rolls eyes, laughs).I suppose dreaming of an escape is better than dreaming of SOMEONE to make all the pain go away. Those people don't exist, but there are always ways to run away and any direction will suffice, just keep going.
No matter how obnoxious life seems to get, I can always smile for you.It can beat me in the face with a rusty shovel and I'll look up from the ground bloody mouthed to shoot a toothless grin in your direction just to spite this f***ing place. You've become my backbone in this spineless Hell.
Because when they break you down all the way to your raw and naked under-soul, when anyone else would crumble, you stand there nude and spit in their faces with nothing left to lose, a formal f*** you to follow.
It's your strength that fuels my will power to overcome it all and stand on top looking down on all of those still struggling and failing, falling to their despair-filled pit to never emerge into the light of you again.