Inside a cynic's head

A Battle of Brains

Memories corrode my mind like acid rain on bare trees. I can't take the intensity of the tide that drives them ashore from the deepest caverns of my brain, flooding every nook and corner and the remorse that accompanies them in a stew of hormones - there's just too much to bury in those wrinkles. I'm getting used to the idea of dwelling in the past and ruining my future in the process. Well, if today is a gift then it sure is wrapped too tight for me to open. so much for calling it a "present".

Unlike some people, the getting over part never really worked for me. I've always got "under" things, let them grow on me and allowed them to blossom into something meaningful inside my head but end up all meaningless at the same time. all within a blink of an eye. whoosh, gone!

Two degrees

Some people thrive in the uncertainty of things. It brings out the best in them. The vast emptiness, the eternal darkness gives rise to hope that there's always light at the end of the tunnel. They're at peace with themselves with no one to trust and no one to confide in. A constant struggle with no constraints yet not entirely free from the ties of society.

while others take a leap of faith, sail on the oceans of belief till they are drowned by the tumultuos waves of betrayal by the ones close to them, and a second degree cynic is brought forth to the world. The doctrine of trust ripped apart into countless number of pieces. The treaty broken, never to be written again!

The Root Cause

Sometimes i think people like to disappoint you on purpose - all hand in hand but still envious. They are programmed to harbor mal-intent and ill-will for everyone around them, everyone that they find challenging. the oddness and eccentricity of human minds is no more a mystery when you start to think in the opposite direction of what they claim to do or say.

are you a cynic?

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Comments 8 comments

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misslee 5 years ago from Beverly Hills, CA

I am always so excited when you publish something new... and always waiting for the next gem you share... thank you!

Sincerely, Addicted Fan

h.a.chauhdary profile image

h.a.chauhdary 5 years ago from Australia Author

you're beyond the bomb diggity with your comments =p thank you.

Nikkij504gurl profile image

Nikkij504gurl 5 years ago from Louisiana

this is very interesting...

h.a.chauhdary profile image

h.a.chauhdary 5 years ago from Australia Author

was in my darkest hour when i wrote this one.

Nikkij504gurl profile image

Nikkij504gurl 5 years ago from Louisiana

well i hope you are in a much better place now, at one point in my life i would have agreed with you on this, in some parts i still do, but the thing is, not all people are like that... sure we may have found the ones that are because there are more of those out there, but we learn from our mistakes and life is one big lesson to learn, and trust is something that should be earned, not ripped apart to never be written again, you should not base your future on past experiences, because even if you get hurt again, it wont be the same, and you will still have those times of happiness with that person, sometimes things just don't work out, and if it didn't its because something much better awaits you.

h.a.chauhdary profile image

h.a.chauhdary 5 years ago from Australia Author

yea, obviously not everyone's the same. they're deceptive at different levels. lol. but i get what you mean and i'm glad you had your trust restored. Its just something i felt like writing, it doesn't necessarily have to make sense ;)

La Papillon profile image

La Papillon 5 years ago from Melbourne, Australia

Clarity and peace begins with the trust and faith one has in one's self.


h.a.chauhdary profile image

h.a.chauhdary 5 years ago from Australia Author

when everyone else starts polluting your world with distrust, I reckon its hard to come by faith.. be it in some dark remote areas of the inside or out.

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