Like a Thief in the Night

I waited outside, cold winds blowing against my cheeks, excited to see the Lunar Eclipse. The moon was so bright and full, above me, appearing so close that I was certain I could reach out and touch it. I remembered as a child, wondering why I could not simply stretch my hands out and pull the moon to me. I wanted so badly to hold it and keep it in my bedroom for a night-light. A smile crossed my face as I shook my head at my own silly thoughts. I knew I could Not touch the moon tonight but still, I stretched out my hands and held it in my palms for just a moment. Though I could not truly feel it, my mind and my heart felt the magnitude of God's creation and I thank him for it, silently.

I looked around me, the trees, bare except for the naked branches. The branches shadows laid on the ground, reaching out across my lawn. They were like arms, clinging to the earth as if they might never let go. Some danced up and down from the wind while others moved from side to side. The moon caused the trees and the houses around me to cast their shadows as if the sun were shining down on them. I could see almost as clearly as if it were dawn, just before the Sun rose. Anxious, waiting... knowing how awed I would be when the Lunar Eclipse started. Picture this night with me, A full moon, illuminating everything from fields to trees to homes. The houses, lights turned off because it is nearly Midnight, appeared to have a nighht light on that shone inside the house. The very night light that I wanted so badly to possess as a child, now belonged to everyone.

Smiling, excited to watch the sun slowly cover the moon, my daughter steps out for a moment. "Dad, the eclipse happened at 7 a.m. this morning. Do you want to see the pictures of it?"

I looked at her with a bit of confusion and suddenly, her words sunk in. I walked with her to the computer where pictures of the eclipse filled the screen. A sadness fell down around me, like a child waiting to see his first circus, only to find it had already been there and was gone.

"Two years, Dad, and it will be back." I said nothing. I simply walked out of the room, hearing her "I am sorry, Dad", as I made my way back outside. The moon was still so bright and so very close that I could see the craters on it's surface. I had battled the "Holiday Blues" and fought each night for weeks the places that my mind takes me. anyone would be disappointed, just as I was. But for me, for those that know how deeply this disorder rocks our world, I spiraled into a darkness that even the moon could not light for me. All that I had been keeping at bay found it's way to my mind and heart. It tugged at me, pulling me to where I truly have been for a very long time.

I stood on the porch, eyes stinging from the cold wind and "other" things. I thought about life and where I have been. I struggled with my failures and short-comings. I thought about where I was in life and where I wanted to be. The mountains I have climbed but never reached the peak. A love I fell short in and didn't finish. projects left sitting, 3/4's finished but never complete. Songs and novels that are half way up the mountain, but have not seen the top. A man more blessed with love and accomplishments and happiness and life than any one man deserved to be and Yet...

In my night, while waiting for something beautiful, the thief comes and snatches it from me. I stare out at God's handi-work and through blurred eyes, I shake my head and watch the moon move across the tree-line. It will not be covered this night. The shadows from the tree's, naked and cold, no longer look like shadows. they are arms, reaching out to steal my smile from me. There will be those that read this and shake their heads in disbelief that a mind, so filled with the goodness and grace of God, could fall into such a place. They will whisper under their breath that I should "Get over it." Some will read this and simply feel a sadness for me. And their will be those that smile softly to themselves and say quietly "I understand."

My smiles are beacons that call to something unseen and beckon them to come steal them from my heart. Those that love me and try to understand keep me grounded. Those that doubt and think I can simply go on, take the wind out of me and leave me wondering... Two years will not be so long. I will wait for the lunar eclipse again and smile if I am blessed to see it. Tis the season to praise God for the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ. I will hold to that warmth for a time. That, is something Nothing in this world or other-wise can steal from me. It is mine to keep.

Comments 16 comments

Enlydia Listener profile image

Enlydia Listener 5 years ago from trailer in the country

I liked the pictures...there are so many other wonders out there waiting to be seen, but this one meant something. I wrote a Hub called Fairly Lunar (now deleted) where I was told how important the effects of the moon are on us, so I sort of "get it".

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jami l. pereira 5 years ago

You are such an amazing and inspiring writer , your words are full of hope and love and Faith ,everything you write melds into a beautifully descriptive masterpiece , you are truly blessed :)I voted up and up all the way across the board and i shared it with my followers too ! This is so Beautiful and poignant , thanks for the read ! :)

Wynn Currie 5 years ago

I'm one who doesn't understand. The absolute beauty of a full moon is lost when it becomes eclipsed. Although I can't say I would be bothered seeing the moon disappear in an eclipse, I don't see any reason to go out of my way to see the phenomena.

Give me the moon light any day. I spent a few hours brushing the horses by moon light this week because I don't have time during the daylight hours. I was amazed at how much they expressed their appreciation. I feel so blessed. I'm so glad that the eclipse didn't happen here, because I would have missed something so much more precious, lol.

Phyllis Doyle profile image

Phyllis Doyle 5 years ago from High desert of Nevada.

I can feel the emotions you went thru while waiting for the eclipse, aware of the light, the shadows, all around you -- then the let-down when realizing the moment had passed before you stepped outside. Beautifully written. Your descriptions make me feel like I was right there, seeing all you saw and feeling the cold night air, the brilliance of the moon light... Lovely!

tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 5 years ago from New York

Beautifully written. I understand. We all have our moments or special events we look forward to and only by the Grace of God do they actually happen.

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

Enlydia... thank you for taking the time to read this. Yes, it may seem odd to some but there was really so much more than simply missing tyhe eclipse. Tonight, I will look at the moon once more and let my heart feel... thank you again for the read and comment.

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

jami, always you are kind to me and your words open my heart to warmth. I thank you for reading this and for feeling my heart inside of it. Always, you inspire me to write from the deepest parts of my soul and I do thank you for that. Always, Darrel

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

Dearest Wynn, you do cause me to smile and I thank you for that. You see through different eyes than I d and see beauty and life in a simpler form. You don't tax yourself with the darkness and give life as much as it will take. I Love and always adore that about you. You and I have talked of these things before and one day, perhaps while sharing a morning coffee, we will talk of it more. Suffice to say for now, you are ever dear to me and yes, the light of the full moon in and of itself is something to enjoy and be awe inspired by. hugss to you dear lady. thank you for reading.

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

Phyllis, your words touch my heart and allow the truth of where I was when last night occurred inside of my heart when I realized I had missed the very thing I had waited for. Like being stood up for the Prom, knowing there would be no pretty girl to kiss good night. Knowing my words took you right to my porch and allowed you the chance to see that Full moon, just as i had seen it made me feel that I was writing with the right ink... My heart. If but a few times I can cause someone to truly, deeply feel what I have felt while writing something, then perhaps I am exactly where I should be and for that, I thank you for I needed to feel that tonight, more than you could ever know. Ready as I was to hang my writing up today, you rekindle the desire that has always burned within my soul to write. Thank you so very much for that. Always, Darrel

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

Thank you tillsontitan for reading this and for your very wonderful comment. I hope that in 2 years, I WILL see the eclipse. thank you again for reading and commenting.

TwoCooks profile image

TwoCooks 5 years ago

You are a very talented writer! Your words and the beautiful pictures took me right to what you were seeing.Very beautiful, and yes sad.n One thing my mom has always said to me during difficult times was that 'this too shall pass' and it did help me. There is also a verse in the bible, I can't remember how it goes exactly, but it basically says that going through difficult times strengthens you and makes you all the more thankful when times get better. That always helps me through difficult times.

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

TwoCooks... I thank you for reading this and I very much appreciate your message. It will pass and life will go on but it always helps to have tyhe encouragement of souls like you to keep me going in the right direction. Thank you very much. Always, Darrel

Paradise7 profile image

Paradise7 5 years ago from Upstate New York

It may sound heartless to say this, but the un-eclipsed moon is even more beautiful. These pictures are beautiful. I'm sorry you missed an eclipse event, and I'm also sorry you were so profoundly affected by missing it.

I'll send you healing thoughts, and hope you receive them in joy and better wellness this holiday season.

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 5 years ago from Iowa Author

Paradise, not heartless at all...The un-eclipsed moon was beautiful, in every way. Never would I take away from it's beauty. It was the time and the feelings of sadness that envelope me during the season that made the event so impactful on my heart.

I thank you very much for reading and for your healing thoughts. They mean so very much to me. Always, Darrel

QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 4 years ago

Lunar eclipse can be such a magical thing, I too find myself most inspired during an eclipse.

Dday50627 profile image

Dday50627 4 years ago from Iowa Author

The night sky is one of the most beautiful sites to see and to share. Laying outside on a blanket, looking up at the stars is something I still love doing. Don't forget that the meteor shower comes on the 11th of Aug so enjoy it. Always, Darrel

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