Dumb poem collection #109 through #119
The next 11 dumb poems after the first 108
It is tough to quit writing these things. Come to think of it, it may be just as tough to read 'em.
# 109 - Pro-Found
Ars est celare artem;
that’s how my verse is, postpartum.
It takes one like you or one like me
to get the message – really see.
You can’t just read ‘em. You have to heart ‘em.
# 110 - Better shape up down there
Why should there be much wonder
that there is often thunder
along with real hard rain?
Sometimes, when God is crying
about creations, trying,
He simply shouts with pain.
# 111 - Night workers – I
As I go to bed of a summer’s night,
I think of sweet rest to come ; pure delight.
So, it’s into my night togs and onto my bed.
When my head hits the pillow, my "roommates" see red.
Soon comes three in the morning, and on the fight goes.
No sleep! I’m still swatting those darn mosquitoes.
# 112 - Night workers – II
Two policemen fast asleep.
Birds all perching, snakes a’creep.
An alley cat who wants a friend.
A neighbor lurching ‘round the bend.
While, overhead, the bats all flutter,
and Bossy Cow makes milk for butter.
# 113 - Night workers – III
"Nurse, Nurse! I’m truly worse.
I’m caught up in this bedpan.
This bed’s a mess, I must confess.
Please do what only you can."
# 114 - Night workers – IV
# 115 - Night workers – V
Up or down, inside or out,
night janitors will rarely shout.
Messy floors; their cup of tea,
and clean commodes; their history.
You never see them as you work,
but all that cleanness is no quirk.
# 116 - Y’all come on back, heah?
If you’re from the South,
steer clear of the Ritz.
Their eggs are OK,
but they cannot cook grits.
# 117 - Through smoke and fog
There’s a funny thing with the mail today;
a 40-cent stamp will cost you "A."
Note: The postal service now just raises prices, but they used to sell letter-marked stamps when they raised prices on the things - hence "A" stamps.
# 118 - A leafing reader
There was a young man from Alief
whose language was strange and most brief.
His L’s were all R’s
and his R’s just plain L,
so he led just as fast as we reaf.
# 119 - Do not re-use this envelope
Non-delivery due to failure of sender
to supply whole address or to render
full postage as due.
We send all back to you.
(Did you mail this while on a big bender?)
More by this Author
This is a funny little poem about some Nazis who are so dumb that they swing on my window curtains after drinking all of my food and wine - quite some ding-dong party guys, right? Goofy illustration by artist, Al Kaeppel
There is some sort of story behind each of the dumb poems in this collection. The ones on this page are not exceptions. So, below each of them I will provide the tale, at least as best as I can remember it. The...
Numbers 13 through 24 in the first collection of funny little poems - Don't be nosy, Birthdays, The jet age, Paradise lost, The librarian, Elery Johnson, Amphibious advice, A pair in the apple tree, the power of babble,...