More embarrassing incidents

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More embarrassing incidents

Hazy soft memories of the dappled sunlight sparkling on the water merged with the reality of tearful arguments with my little brother. Frantically nipping each other, sweatily squashed in the back seat, asking Mum and Dad for the hundredth time 'Are we there yet'? Ah, the joy and relaxation of family holidays eh?

By the time we arrived at our destination, my poor parents looked like they needed an all expenses paid holiday at a luxury health spa. In a desperate attempt to stop us bickering, they promised they'd take us to the 'Water park' in Torremolinos the next day which naturally provoked loud squawks of excitement from Ben and myself!

After three hours sleep, We burst into our parent's room in a flurry of excitement and bounced on their bed manically. They groaned in a groggy, hungover fashion and looked pleadingly at us, sorrowful pillow imprints on their exhausted cheeks. Bless them! There was no way they were going to get any sleep with us two leaping about like psychotic ferrets!

Bravely, perhaps stupidly, they sighed and turned over, putting their heads under the covers. Ben cheekily suggested going to the sink and soaking the face cloth in freezing cold water and squeezing it over our parent's heads. I agreed wholeheartedly. We waited in anticipation as the frozen drops found contact with my Dad's sleepy, warm head...

The piercing cry that erupted from my Dad's mouth made me jump. I won't repeat what he said but if the air had changed colour at this point it would have been a vivid blue! A very grumpy breakfast was had by all then finally, we headed for the water park...

After hurtling down an array of twisting slides, I was high as a kite. It was then I saw it, a real feast for the eyes! An enormous slide with an almost vertical drop and the highest platform I'd ever seen. People lined up at the top were like ants, watching them plummet down the terrifying drop filled me with a fizzy joy. The best bit though, the part that has remained imprinted on my memory is what happened after the people emerged from the splash pool at the base of the slide...

All participants, regardless of age and gender sported an amusing peter stringfellowesque 'G string' effect with their swimwear disappering up their bottoms! An assortment of cheeks of vaying shapes, colours and sizes rose glistening from the splash pool. This amused Ben and myself highly and tears of mirth spurted freely. This was until a rather swarthy man surfaced revealing the stuff of nightmares... A hairy bottom!!! I remain terrified of them to this day!

Eventually, after crying with laughter for at least twenty minutes, we began the mammoth climb up the stairs. At this point, I was far more concerned about what my buttocks would look like than how scared I'd be whizzing down the steep incline looming ahead! When the moment arrived, it took my breath away and I let out a wild shriek like a banshee. After breathlessly plopping into the pool, I took great pains to carefully pull my bikini bottoms back to their rightful place.

Smugly almost, I emerged knowing my cheeks were contained and I would not be the target of sniggering. An impossibly good looking boy with stunning Latino looks caught my eye and nudged his friend winking. Paranoia gave way to pride as I realised I was being checked out! They must have been impressed by my bravery. I noticed other teenage boys giving me the eye, my heart swelled proudly, I must have been looking hot!

I bashfully looked downwards as I passed a group of grinning youths and to my utter mortification saw, out of the corner of my eye a sight I will never forget! My left breast, revived by the blast of icy water had popped perkily out of my bikini. The other one however, had retained it's dignity and remained under wraps. Words can not describe the disbelief and horror I felt. I had unwittingly exposed myself to the majority of Torremolinos!

My skin turned into the colour of steamed pork and I willed the very ground beneath me to swallow me whole. My passion for water parks has since diminished....

Tara Carbery © 2011

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Comments 31 comments

Jennie 5 years ago

Hahahaha I share your shame. x


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 5 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Isn't it mortifying!


leni sands profile image

leni sands 4 years ago from UK

Hi Tara, what a treat to read such an interesting and funny story, over breakfast, all the better for it being true...keep 'em coming!!


nicregi profile image

nicregi 4 years ago from Malaysia

Hi there!

Reading this is just....marvelous! Great writing and seriously funny story. Great for an evening read.

Thanks for sharing!


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Cheers! There are plenty more where that came from. Whether that's a good thing or a bad thing I don't know! Thanks for reading! Tara


epigramman profile image

epigramman 4 years ago

...so sorry to embarrass you further my favorite peanut but I will be posting this most funny episode to my Facebook page with a direct link back here because it's just great writing - and your narrative flow is so natural - a gift most people seek a lifetime to find - and I am certainly not laughing at you - I would be mortified myself!!! Happy new year from lake erie time 1:24am with best wishes for your health and happiness for 2012 Ontario, Canada


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Right back 'atcha Epi. Glad you enjoyed it!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi, Oh No! lol! I would have ran all the way back to the room I was staying in! it nearly happened to me at the local swimming pool, I had only just learned to swim, and I went under, grabbing hold of the nearest boy to drag myself back up, and to my horror my stupid costume had slipped down, it was one of those strapless ones! yeah, I know, stupid thing to wear in a pool! lol! thanks for the laugh, cheers nell


Sam Elutilo profile image

Sam Elutilo 4 years ago from Wallington, United Kingdom

Oh no! Reading this has made me laugh. You remind me not to take life so seriously as we all have mishaps. A thoroughly entertaining read. Keep it up!


Vinaya Ghimire profile image

Vinaya Ghimire 4 years ago from Nepal

Our life actually brims with such embarrassments. You are brave and honest to share your story.

Cheers


prairieprincess profile image

prairieprincess 4 years ago from Canada

Peanutrious, I know that feeling! I've had a few very embarrassing moments, too, and uggh ... there's nothing like the feeling of complete humiliation to make you feel terrible. It's good we can laugh about it MUCH later, though! I enjoyed your writing -- very engaging style!


soumyasrajan 4 years ago from Mumbai India and often in USA

Hey! You write nicely, bravely and keep reader engrossed even in embarrassments. Enjoyed very much and as I said you in previous one, you must be sweet, and understanding person. All the good luck Peanutritious!


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Nell, Ha! It's a hazard us ladies become accustomed to!

Sam, Thanks! So nice to hear you say that because i'm usually guilty of taking life far too seriously. Sometimes though, i'll do/see something funny and crack up laughing and feel full of positivity!


racksjackson profile image

racksjackson 4 years ago from New York

You have shared true story . After reading whole story , i am sure you have not do again this type of activity again otherwise you will face problem in future. God Bless You !

Voted Up !


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Thank you Vinaya, Prarie princess, Soumyasrajan and Racksjackson. There are moments of comedy gold in everyone's life even though it feels like the most mortifying thing on earth at the time!


Faceless39 profile image

Faceless39 4 years ago from The North Woods, USA

It's not often that I read a hub and literally "laugh out loud," but it exploded out of me and I couldn't help it.

You're obviously a natural-born writer and entertainer, and hilarious in your approach and use of adjectives.

Whatever has come your way in life has surely been for the best, as you are clearly extremely talented. I'm glad I read this hub.

Rated up, funny, awesome, and interesting.


James Vernon profile image

James Vernon 4 years ago from UK

Haha. Really good.


ChristyWrites profile image

ChristyWrites 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

Hehe another funny hub! I can just see you thinking you are being checked out by the guy... LOL :)


fpherj48 profile image

fpherj48 4 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

Sounds like a wonderful time with your parents and brother......plus a little incident that made you cringe.......water parks are great fun. Remember the fun...forget the embarrassment!


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Can I just say... Hairy bottoms still terrify me!


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Sorry folks for the late response. I've just slapped my own wrist!

Faceless, Wow! Thank you for your compliments. I'm blown away! I'm glad you enjoyed it and even happier that it made you laugh out loud! I have several excruciating anecdotes like this and i'll get working on my next one. Nothing like humiliating myself! Take care.

James, thank you, so glad you enjoyed it.

Christy, i'll never forget the mortifying moment when I realised I was flashing! Glad you liked it.

fpher, sadly when I look back on it, all I think about are bottoms and boobs! Whoops! Thanks for reading.


DDE profile image

DDE 4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

Funny and true about life one often has the embarrassing and funny stuff going on be cool!!!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 4 years ago

...returning once again to another classic embarrassing episode but you are such a terrific and self-deprecating writer that you make this story wildly entertaining for your readers to enjoy so bravo to you for your humility

and your ability to communicate these stories so well ..... lake erie time ontario canada 11:18am


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Thanks for coming back to read it again. I'm well chuffed! I think it's about time that I got another embarrassing incident written sharpish!


Redberry Sky profile image

Redberry Sky 4 years ago

Oh .. my ...GOD! You've brought back every shameful adolescent memory I thought I'd buried long ago! Fantastic story, Tara - brings tears of laughter (and empathy, as I remember my own little incidents!) to my eyes :)


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Hi Red, so glad it gave you a good laugh. Take care x


tsmog profile image

tsmog 4 years ago from Escondido, CA

Smile . . .shhhhh, I won't tell anyone, promise, I didn't look either. (t in tsmog = tim) so if you believed that, well I lied.

I really am enthralled with your use of language. I was following along as if it were a spy thriller prances along toward a great mystery.

Thank you!

Tim


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 4 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Thank YOU Tim! I'm really glad you enjoyed it. It still makes me cringe to this day!


tsmog profile image

tsmog 4 years ago from Escondido, CA

wow, what time is it there. I had not even finished the eight course meal you set at the table with the sharing and I see a reply. I think FB may get a kick out of ad, yet hopefully they go passed the trailer, sit back in the theatre, and have a bit of fun.


Peanutritious profile image

Peanutritious 3 years ago from Cheshire, UK Author

Thanks Tim, I must add I recently had a short relationship with a gentleman who had a hairy bottom, explaining why the relationship was short! They are a frightening sight!


DREAM ON profile image

DREAM ON 3 years ago

Another surprise told so wonderfully.You keep them coming.My own memories are starting to come back to haunt me.

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