More embarrassing incidents
More embarrassing incidents
Hazy soft memories of the dappled sunlight sparkling on the water merged with the reality of tearful arguments with my little brother. Frantically nipping each other, sweatily squashed in the back seat, asking Mum and Dad for the hundredth time 'Are we there yet'? Ah, the joy and relaxation of family holidays eh?
By the time we arrived at our destination, my poor parents looked like they needed an all expenses paid holiday at a luxury health spa. In a desperate attempt to stop us bickering, they promised they'd take us to the 'Water park' in Torremolinos the next day which naturally provoked loud squawks of excitement from Ben and myself!
After three hours sleep, We burst into our parent's room in a flurry of excitement and bounced on their bed manically. They groaned in a groggy, hungover fashion and looked pleadingly at us, sorrowful pillow imprints on their exhausted cheeks. Bless them! There was no way they were going to get any sleep with us two leaping about like psychotic ferrets!
Bravely, perhaps stupidly, they sighed and turned over, putting their heads under the covers. Ben cheekily suggested going to the sink and soaking the face cloth in freezing cold water and squeezing it over our parent's heads. I agreed wholeheartedly. We waited in anticipation as the frozen drops found contact with my Dad's sleepy, warm head...
The piercing cry that erupted from my Dad's mouth made me jump. I won't repeat what he said but if the air had changed colour at this point it would have been a vivid blue! A very grumpy breakfast was had by all then finally, we headed for the water park...
After hurtling down an array of twisting slides, I was high as a kite. It was then I saw it, a real feast for the eyes! An enormous slide with an almost vertical drop and the highest platform I'd ever seen. People lined up at the top were like ants, watching them plummet down the terrifying drop filled me with a fizzy joy. The best bit though, the part that has remained imprinted on my memory is what happened after the people emerged from the splash pool at the base of the slide...
All participants, regardless of age and gender sported an amusing peter stringfellowesque 'G string' effect with their swimwear disappering up their bottoms! An assortment of cheeks of vaying shapes, colours and sizes rose glistening from the splash pool. This amused Ben and myself highly and tears of mirth spurted freely. This was until a rather swarthy man surfaced revealing the stuff of nightmares... A hairy bottom!!! I remain terrified of them to this day!
Eventually, after crying with laughter for at least twenty minutes, we began the mammoth climb up the stairs. At this point, I was far more concerned about what my buttocks would look like than how scared I'd be whizzing down the steep incline looming ahead! When the moment arrived, it took my breath away and I let out a wild shriek like a banshee. After breathlessly plopping into the pool, I took great pains to carefully pull my bikini bottoms back to their rightful place.
Smugly almost, I emerged knowing my cheeks were contained and I would not be the target of sniggering. An impossibly good looking boy with stunning Latino looks caught my eye and nudged his friend winking. Paranoia gave way to pride as I realised I was being checked out! They must have been impressed by my bravery. I noticed other teenage boys giving me the eye, my heart swelled proudly, I must have been looking hot!
I bashfully looked downwards as I passed a group of grinning youths and to my utter mortification saw, out of the corner of my eye a sight I will never forget! My left breast, revived by the blast of icy water had popped perkily out of my bikini. The other one however, had retained it's dignity and remained under wraps. Words can not describe the disbelief and horror I felt. I had unwittingly exposed myself to the majority of Torremolinos!
My skin turned into the colour of steamed pork and I willed the very ground beneath me to swallow me whole. My passion for water parks has since diminished....
Tara Carbery © 2011
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