The Morning Conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama #24

Biking on Martha's Vineyard
Biking on Martha's Vineyard

August 23, 2011 Leroy - The Right Medicine

A fictional (and satirical) account of the private morning conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama by Dexter Yarbrough. Number 24 in the series.

*The President and family vacationing on Martha's Vineyard.

Michelle: What a nice bike ride, huh?

Barack: Yes. I love it here. This has been a great vacation! Except for this pesky fly that keeps following me!

Michelle: Where did the girl's go?

Barack: They went the other way down the beach. Your mother is with them.

Michelle: We have had a rough couple of weeks, Barack.

Barack: Yeah, I need a dose of Leroy!

Mural of Leroy
Mural of Leroy

Michelle: Well, Leroy had to attend summer school.

Barack: Wait! OK, the Secret Service moved away. It's beautiful on the beach. Go ahead.

Michelle: He was given a relatively easy homework assignment. All he had to do was put the following words in a sentence.

Barack: (begins giggling)

Michelle: I haven't said anything yet!

Barack: I know! I know!

Michelle: CATACOMB: Don King was at the fight the other night. Man, somebody give that CATACOMB!

Barack: Ha ha ha!!!

Michelle: STAIN: My cousin asked if I was STAIN for dinner!

Barack: (laughing loudly)

Michelle: FORECLOSE: If I pay alimony this month, I'll have no money FORECLOSE!

Barack: Ha ha ha! For clothes! Ha ha ha!!!

Michelle: RECTUM: I had two Cadillac's, but my ol' lady RECTUM both!

Barack: Oh, God! Ha ha ha!!! (continues laughing hysterically)

Michelle: TRIPOLI: I was gonna buy my old lady a bra but I couldn't find no TRIPOLI!

Barack: Triple E! Whoo!! Ha ha ha ha!!!

Michelle: Alright! That's enough of Leroy for one day.

Barack: (crying from laughing so hard) Man! That stuff is so funny.

Michelle: Barack, we need to talk about what's happening with your base. It is eroding.

Barack: C'mon, Michelle! I was having such a good time. Don't worry about it. The Illuminati, Soros and the Rothchild's have it all sewn up for me!

Michelle: How about I tell the jokes, nut!

Barack: (sighs) What is it?

Michelle: Barack, you are losing support in the Jewish community. I mean they have feelings that range from suspicion to hostility. You are losing the support of some of your Jewish donors.

Barack: We have started to reach out to them, Michelle.

Michelle: If you were to keep a better relationship with them, there would be no need to "reach out." Barack, AIPAC had to send messages to their delegates not to boo you at their recent conference!

Barack: It's still early, Michelle. It will all come together.

Michelle: Oh? Still early? What about the Latino community? Your numbers are down, Barack. Luckily, Latinos aren't too willing to support Republicans.

Barack: I have met with Latino leaders and I went to Puerto Rico. I can't do much about immigration reform without Republican support in Congress.

Michelle: The point is that you have all but ignored them since you took office. And what about the record number of deportations?

Barack: Well, I have to enforce the law, Michelle.

Michelle: You are the law, Barack! Come up with a more sensitive policy. This is an executive branch issue. You do have some control!

Barack: Alright. I'll see what I can do.

Michelle: And what about the liberals? Did you know that there are websites like "Progressives Against Obama" and "Democrats Against Obama?"

Barack: I can't please everyone!

Michelle: It's not about pleasing, Barack! It was supposed to be about change!

Barack: Can we go back to the jokes? We are supposed to be on vacation.

Midwest Bus Tour
Midwest Bus Tour
Congresswoman Maxine Waters
Congresswoman Maxine Waters
Tavis Smiley & Cornell West
Tavis Smiley & Cornell West

Michelle: If you can take time out to find out what's happening with Libya and the Colonel, you can listen to me!

Barack: (sarcastically) Yes? And?

Michelle: (lifts self out of beach chair, hands on hips, head and neck twisting) And? And?

Barack: (looking up at Michelle) C'mon, Michelle.

Michelle: And...what about that bus tour? Three days in the "heartland!" On a bus made in...

Barack: Let's be fair, Michelle! That bus was purchased by the Secret Service for security purposes.

Michelle: (sitting down again) Alright. But you took a bus tour, Barack and you didn't even go into the black communities. You have got to stop taking black voters for granted!

Barack: I'm not! I sent senior White House advisers to black communities to let them know what we have done to improve the quality of life for blacks.

Michelle: Yeah, well they need to see you, not some token advisor! While the unemployment rate among blacks is heading upwards towards seventeen percent, according to the numbers your folks put out, your approval ratings have dropped from ninety-five percent to eighty-one percent. The truth of the matter is we both know that black unemployment is really around thirty percent.

Barack: Blacks will vote for me Michelle. Just give it a little time.

Michelle: While we "give it a little time" some blacks are planning to sit out 2012, Barack. They may not vote against you, but many aren't going to vote for you. Now, Congresswoman Maxine Waters and Congressmen Elijah Cummings and John Conyers are speaking out against you. Not to mention Tavis Smiley and Cornel West.

Barack: Michelle, blacks and other voters had expectations that I could not have possibly satisfied. I am doing the best I can with what I have to work with.

Michelle: My purpose is not to get on your case. But sometimes you just don't seem as if you know what is happening. You have to be more forceful and you have to appeal to your base again!

Barack: I know what's happening and what people think. I see my poll numbers everyday. And the poll numbers are way down for Republicans in Congress as well.

Martha's Vineyard
Martha's Vineyard

Michelle: You won't be running against Congress. You'll be running against a hungry opponent wanting to send us back into private life.

Barack: (sitting back in his beach chair) I'm not worried at all!

Michelle: Well, I have another Leroy joke for you!

Barack: Good! We're supposed to be relaxing. I hope it's funny!

Michelle: DECIDE: After four years in office, and forgetting to appeal to your base, you better have a couple of jobs on DECIDE.

Barack: Michelle, that's not funny!

Michelle: DISMAY: If you don't get your act together, when the voter totals come back in 2012, your campaign manager may say, "Mr. President, DISMAY hurt a little."

Barack: I said I needed a dose of Leroy. Not a shot in the butt!

Stay Tuned for More 'Morning Conversations...' with Barack & Michelle Obama, next time!

Copyright 2011 - Dexter Yarbrough

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Comments 46 comments

WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

You should get a call from the White House any day!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Will! I hope they can take a joke! And a little bit of truth! Thanks for reading!


American View profile image

American View 5 years ago from Plano, Texas

Wow, I bet your accounts are frozen, the IRS is at your door step with rubber gloves on, Holder is trying to figure out which court to prosecute you in, and Michelle is wondering if you are available for she is dumping a political loser. Outstanding! cannot wait for the next installment. Hope Leroy did good in summer school


Sueswan 5 years ago

"Michelle: DECIDE: After four years in office, and forgetting to appeal to your base, you better have a couple of jobs on DECIDE."

Brilliant. You are in top form Dexter.

Voted up, up and away!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

...still still still one of my favorite hub series of all time - no wonder I send everyone your way - let's hope Obama gets in for four more years and you can keep writing this classic to entertain and enthrall us.

lake erie time 4:49am high winds tonight after work this morning - having a beer and some loud music for you buddy ....


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi American View! I am glad you enjoyed it. If you find the time, I hope you read some of the earlier ones. Thanks so much!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Sueswan! I thought folks may get a chuckle out of that one! Thank you so much!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Epi! You are a great man and a fantastic supporter! Thank you so much!


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

The FBI is going to show up at your door. This has the ring of truth to it. Your sense of humor shines through here.


dahoglund profile image

dahoglund 5 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

I'm glad to see them mingling with the ordinary folks.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Mckbirdbks! I hope not. Thanks so much!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Dahoglund! YOU have a great sense of humor!


Cardisa profile image

Cardisa 5 years ago from Jamaica

Hehehehe.....lol

Dexter, you are a riot. How do you come up with those Leroy jokes man. You kill me!

Hahahaha....lol, can't stop laughing!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Oh, Cardisa! Michelle is the one that provides that information. I just listen and write! Thanks!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

I swear Dex, Michelle can be such a drag. I mean the President is trying to relax from all the hard work he has been buried in and this kind of nagging is not what he needs. He needs golf, he needs elaborate dinners, he needs a few laughs and he needs to head home before either the hurricane or his poll numbers sweep him away. Up funny and oh so awesome!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Pop! Like I said, you are on top of your game! Great observation! Thanks so much!


FitnezzJim profile image

FitnezzJim 5 years ago from Fredericksburg, Virginia

Uh, rumor has it the Illuminati no longer support Obama.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

I guess the President didn't get that message, Jim.


iZeko profile image

iZeko 5 years ago

This kept me laughing to the end. So hilarious and original!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks, iZeko! I'm glad it made you laugh!


drbj profile image

drbj 5 years ago from south Florida

You are a funny man, Dex. Do hope the Royal Couple have a sense of humor. For your sake!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Drbj! I doubt the Royal Couple have time to read what I have to say! :-) Thanks!


marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 5 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

Slapstick hysterical and just what I needed today, Dexter! You always put a smile on my face and I thank you so much. Hope all is well.

Voted UP & FAB, mar.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank YOU for reading Mar! I am so glad you found it enjoyable!


Reynold Jay profile image

Reynold Jay 5 years ago from Saginaw, Michigan

We need a title for the cover when you assemble all this into an eBook. I'll lt you decide that one. Too bad he did not stay on vacation! I suppose the East Coast is so happy that he cut it off a day early so he could save them!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Mr. Jay! You are the one with the great wit and humor. Yes! Yes!


Jo_Goldsmith11 profile image

Jo_Goldsmith11 5 years ago

Hello Dex! I sure needed this one! again..really great job! I think Michelle needs to give the Pres encouragement, not be on his butt so much. The thing that gets me about the *voters*, is that they expect everything all at once and over night! This President has been side tracked with the recent natural disasters. As well as the crisis with the debt. The Tea party craziness almost pushed us all over the cliff. Our credit score went down and now it's back up, last I heard. I think as Americans we need to do what we can in our communities to help him out. Not keep complaining that we aren't being listened to. We are! We just have many folks in there that needs to go home! :) This is just my opinion anyway. for what it is worth.

Take care..


sheila b. profile image

sheila b. 5 years ago

Thanks for the laughs; I love Leroy!


caltex profile image

caltex 5 years ago

This is so hilarious!!! As usual, voted up!

That pesky fly better watch it! :D


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Jo! Your opinion certainly matters. Let's see what happens over the next 13 months! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Sheila b.! I am so glad you enjoyed the laughs!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Caltex! Thanks so much! I always appreciate what you have to say!


felicitylovespari profile image

felicitylovespari 5 years ago

So awesome Dexter. Hilarious yet ringing with truth and and enjoyable read. Love your stuff buddy!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank you so much FelicityLovesParis! I really appreciate your kind remarks!


James A Watkins profile image

James A Watkins 5 years ago from Chicago

You are quite the wit, my friend. I enjoy your recreations of these conversations. Well done!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank you, James. Your comments mean a lot to me. Stay tuned for more!


Rosemay50 profile image

Rosemay50 5 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

This is so hilarious. I do enjoy reading your series on Barack & Michelle Obama.

Loved it voted up


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank you, Rosemay! I hope you will continue reading them!


bethperry profile image

bethperry 5 years ago from Tennesee

LOL These are so funny!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Bethperry! Thank you so much. More to come soon. Please come back and read more of them.


Reynold Jay profile image

Reynold Jay 5 years ago from Saginaw, Michigan

Yep--any moment now the Feds are gonna come knock'n on your door... Nice and Funny UP...


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Well, Mr. RJ, I hope they have a sense of humor! Thanks, sir!


Ghost32 5 years ago

Man, I needed this today! (Which is apparently why I didn't get around to it 3 weeks ago!)

Michelle's wrong about one thing, though, at least for 2012. Not only are a lot of Hispanics looking more and more ready to vote for Republicans--a lot of them ARE Republicans. Which tickles me no end.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Ghost! I am glad you got a good laugh off of this. Michelle? Wrong? I would hate to be the one to tell her so! Thanks!


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

Hi Dexter,

I certaily have so many of these to catch up on and I am now hooked.

So naturally written and so unique.

Thanks for this gem and i now look forward to many many more.

A vote up has to happen here.

Take car and have a great day.

Eiddwen.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Eiddwen! It is always a pleasure to have you visit. I am glad you enjoyed it. Thanks so much!

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