Much Ado About Cereal - Short Story - Non-Fiction
A healthy breakfast to start the day off right.
I was standing in the shower one morning when my beloved husband burst into the bathroom and announced, “You ate all the Raisin Bran!” The inflection in his voice was angry and accusatory and I was simply . . . stunned.
“Well, I am not the only person who eats Raisin Bran,” I responded, not quite sure where this exchange was headed, but knowing that he had eaten his fair share and determined to make that point clear.
“I just wanted a bowl of Raisin Bran so I wouldn’t have to stop and get a sausage biscuit; I’m trying to loose weight you know!”
At this I had to stifle a laugh, grateful for the shower curtain that separated us. Yes, he has mentioned the need to drop a few pounds, but this is nothing new. It’s a declaration made on a regular basis, usually followed by a bowl of . . . you guessed it, Raisin Bran.
“weight loss program”
At lunch he calls while making his way through the local fast-food restaurant ordering his usual burger, fries and a coke. Each evening he consumes the dinner I have consciously endeavored to make as healthy and low calorie as possible to support his “weight loss program”.
After dinner he wanders into the kitchen, pulls out a bag of chips, box of crackers or a “few” cookies and a soda . . . or two, and returns to his recliner to “munch” while watching his favorite television shows.
At the conclusion of the evening news he starts getting ready for bed; this includes washing his face, brushing his teeth and slapping his stomach while announcing, “Man, I need to loose some weight!”
I realized, while I was silently holding my soapy sides in the shower, that what he surely meant to say was “I really wanted some Raisin Bran this morning but we are out. When you go to the store, be sure and get some more, will you hon?” But in his frustration at a no Raisin Bran breakfast which would certainly derail his “weight loss” goal, he knew it was my fault.
I am fully expecting tonight, after he washes his face, brushes his teeth and slaps his stomach he’ll say something like, “Gee I sure could loose some weight if you would quit eating all the Raisin Bran!”
I went to the store right away and bought the “family size” box.
Breakfast of Champions?
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