My Battle- A Poem
I heard a voice while I wept calling my name steadily
It was kind, it was calm, said it's okay, said it's easy
To take that eraser to my soft skin
And rub and rub over and over again.
Tears fell and no one was there but this voice whispering in my ear.
She said, "It's okay I am here."
I don't, no I don't want to do this and have to start all over again.
"It's good for you, listen to me. I am your friend."
If I do this they won't understand, what will people say?
"It doesn't matter. It makes you feel better, the pain will go away."
It's been so long voice where have you been?
Why are you doing this again?
The voice just remains calm but seems so strong
And whatever I do seems to be just wrong.
I stop crying, the tears freeze and I stare.
Voice you seem to be the only one who cares.
If you say it's okay, I guess it can't be wrong
I haven't done this for so long.
This eraser works, this eraser stings
This eraser brings the pain out of me.
1 mark, 2 marks, another mark makes 3
Oh no voice what have you done to me?!
I can't believe I have listened to you,
Once again I feel so blue.
Why do you have to act so kind?
Why do you have to mess with my mind?
This poem is a true story. It is something I wrote after an event that did take place. I am glad to say that I am getting the help I need now. I do still have my downs but I also have my ups. If you struggle with self-destruction, with any form of it, get the help you need. Even if it is with just a close friend. Reach out to someone close to you. You are not in this alone. You never are.
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