My Mistake

There are these feelings usually kept inside

Feelings people often try to hide

But something inside feels such release with expression

So I did what I know how to best

I wrote and I wrote some more

I let my words pour forth

And some things I shared

Only because I believe you cared

Not necessarily about what I had to say

But about me and that that would not change

Still, I don't know what made me think it was okay

There's still too much room for misinterpretation that way

I never meant to condemn

What a strange contradiction I am

To in writing put my heart and insecurities

Out there on my sleeve

When I know that I would not otherwise share these thoughts

Leaving them there in my mind or letting them get lost

In the back of my mind, I knew that you always could go

I guess I just never really thought you would go

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Comments 6 comments

jhamann profile image

jhamann 23 months ago from Reno NV

This release through writing is the only was I can get all those feelings out of me. I find I am so quit and never share other than in my poetry. I have found that I needed this, it helps me stayed centered. Thank you for sharing. Jamie


shanmarie profile image

shanmarie 23 months ago from Texas Author

I guess I needed it too. I just find it all unfair sometimes. Maybe what I needed wasn't mine to take. Better sometimes to keep it in or at least to myself, though the sharing is what I needed most in this instance.


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 23 months ago from South Africa

Shanmari, this poem of yours reminded me of myself - the way I was many moons ago. How often do we say something without the meaning to condemn others or ourselves, and then, out of the blue, our words are being used against us and/or as a justification to leave us all bewildered on our own.


shanmarie profile image

shanmarie 23 months ago from Texas Author

Yes, Martie. Sometimes the hardest thing is just to accept that whatever was said or done is done. No need to keep hurting over the consequences. And I know these things in my head and heart both, yet it takes a good while for my heart to heal when I blame myself. The truth of it is, though, that we are all human and vare who we are in the moment at any given moment. I would like to believe that the truly strong bonds weather the storms and are never really gone. If someone is worth knowing and loving, the choice to love and to be in one another's lives is not really a hard one to make. But, it always takes two to be that open, willing, accepting, and forgiving.


ladyguitarpicker profile image

ladyguitarpicker 23 months ago from 3460NW 50 St Bell, Fl32619

You have to stop beating yourself up, we all do this sometime in our life. You are young, one day you will speak and not care, thank God you do care right now. This is a good poem.


shanmarie profile image

shanmarie 23 months ago from Texas Author

Very true, ladyguitarpicker. Thank you for your kind words and for stopping by.

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