My Therapy Through Rap (Prose Poetry)

I've always said that writing things down is one of the ways to release your bottled up emotions. So when I was getting over a mentally draining relationship, I did just that.

The "poem" below, which has no formal structure (hence my referring to it as "prose poetry"), is even probably more like a "rap". If I was ever to read it aloud, it would always be with some frustration, confusion and anger in my voice. Just add a beat and you have it. Eminem style!

It's also like a letter I wish I could write and at the time it was certainly not something that I could confront my ex with due to her health (*just* in case it was all true).

Anyways, here it is. Feel free to criticize (and if you like it let me know!).

Two weeks ago you were nothing but dead
You'd had a brain aneurysm and there was bleeding in your head
They couldn't stop it, palative caring instead
But then within a week of a miracle operation, you said
That you were allowed out on the farm to go and play with the horses
Now i don't even need to research books or take any medical courses
To know that things just don't actually happen this quick
Doctors would never let their patients out when they're this sick
I was supposed to come, but it was too soon and you weren't allowed visitors
Then the next day it seemed, you were out and about...it's ridiculous!
Even if it were all true, and you knew what you had to do
Why would you even take the risk after all you have been through?

You lied about Jess's death - she died twice, two weeks apart
You lied about your siblings - now there's two more, for a start
You wouldn't show me that "legit" photo of me with Giselle
Did you make her up to keep me close to you, pray tell
Were you really sick? You wouldn't even show me your scar!
I hate that i'm doubting it, but it's just going too far
All my friends had enough and cause my family's exhausted
I'm depressed and I'm stuffed, there's no support and i've lost it
- I know for a fact, dating is meant to be easy
You didn't give me my space, you needed to be less greedy
Plus you didn't bring Charlie out to meet me, does she
even exist? How do i know she does, really?
See there's only so much that i can take your word for
I just feel like i don't even really know you no more
See I don't know what to believe, so i just sit on the fence
While i pray to understand it cause i have gone to great lengths
To try to figure it all out, cause this just doesn't make sense
Sorry but I'm struggling to digest these stories without evidence

You said you were a twin... now you say you're a triplet!
At what point did you really expect me to believe it?
See, i'm someone that doesn't like others to hurt
So sometimes in the course of events, i put them all first
But like you said, i try to please everyone but just shouldn't bother
Cause there is always some girl whose after more than i offer
I just need some time out to get my life back in order
Define my borders, maybe go and find a new lover
See the way it's played out, you knew of this all along
That there's no future for us, that's why your visions have gone
Oh, and all those predictions about my family were wrong
There's enough material here to do an album of songs!

With every therapeutic "release" poem I try to balance it with a positive, grateful one. No matter how bad a situation or relationship is, there is always something positive that comes out of it. Maybe I will publish the other poem sometime.

Do you have a relationship that changed you forever?