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NO COST - SO UNTRUE

Updated on June 18, 2013
My husband's flag
My husband's flag

A Measure of Time

I heard myself say “no cost”, when I was asked what the cost was for my husband’s memorial and committal services. I knew the minute I said it I was wrong but, I didn't correct my statement. There was a cost. A cost that is buried with him. A cost that many will not share or understand. A cost that can’t be recovered or recouped. A cost that he and others bear for years or a cost that is paid prematurely.

What is the cost of a soldiers funeral? The cost is time. And, what does time cost? Ask a child who never knew their parent or couldn't understand how final a good-bye could be. Ask a spouse who is left with only the memories of happier times. Ask a parent whose dreams stop when time stops too early. Ask a friend who spent time in pointless arguments or postponed moments of friendship.

And sometimes the cost is not in death but also in living. What is the cost of being a soldier? The cost is still time. Ask a soldier, who pays the price of time, the cost of: not seeing their children grow and achieve their “firsts”; spending time away from spouses; not being there for their parents; and seeing friendships fade. Time does not stop.

When a soldier spends time in war, time doesn't always heal all wounds. Soldier’s physical and emotional wounds can be attended to, but not all are healed. Time doesn't always erase memories and time past can interrupt time present and reappear in the future times. Time of the past can dominate present and future time. Time does not erase all things and can be a burdensome yoke.

The cost of a soldier's funeral is Time - very precious time.

I was fortunate to have had time to share with my husband beyond his service to his country. He carried the pain of the time of his service that could only be understood by those who bore the same yoke. A price that he was still proud to pay.

I know I will spend this Memorial Day more appreciative of the price of time.

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