No Detail Ever Escaped You

Proud warrior, I once knew

An ax to grind was nothin' new

Squint to see the scrutinized view

Once, no detail ever escaped you

==========================

Slayed the dragon down by the slough

Conquered the con man's clever rue

Fearless you stood and left the pew

Once, no detail ever escaped you

==========================

Opponents fell, away, they withdrew

From light of eyes that focused true

Power in a look that held all in queue

Once, no detail ever escaped you

==========================

Stretch to fit and fill your shoe

Bloodlines hope I imbue

Take the reins in my debut

Once, no detail ever escaped you

==========================

Princess warrior, I once knew

Confused now, wary, stumbling through

Puzzled pieces you misconstrue

Once, no detail ever escaped you

==========================

Comments 35 comments

Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Voted up and awesome. We're all going through life fighting some sort of battles.


dghbrh profile image

dghbrh 4 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

nice and true......voted up


pennyofheaven profile image

pennyofheaven 4 years ago from New Zealand

Wow very awesome! Details may not be that important as life evolves. Thanks!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Gypsy, This is about my mom, who, since her bypass surgery last summer has been dramatically impacted by dementia. Growing up, she was an awesome force to be reckoned with. Smart, gorgeous, she was powerful in her own right. She looked right through bullshit. She noticed everything, each and every nuance. Age slows everyone down, it natural, but the time on the bypass machine during her heart surgery, was frightening and although the initial toll seen in the ICU lessened, she can no longer drive, get through the grocery store on her own or remember our conversation from the day before. She will need increasing help. She is aware enough to realize what is happening and worries about being a burden. Her OCD, always a part of her, actually motivated and energized her when she was independent, but it can be maddening for a caregiver to satisfy. Not a new story, but our roles have swapped. I know it is much more difficult for my mom to relinquish her independence than it is for me to try to help her. And yes, we are all fighting some kind of battle as long as we're breathing, Gypsy. Thank you, my friend.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you kindly, dghbrh.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thanks for your visit, pennyofheaven. I appreciate your support and love to see "wow very awesome"!


Vincent Moore 4 years ago

Yes my friend Dementia is a curse to our souls. I've seen it in others as well and I wonder when it will attack me? To have all our past slowly evaporate before our eyes is sad indeed. To witness it in our own family is even more devastating. I hope to pass before I fall prey to this disease. I'm sure your mom was much like you, full of energy, artistic, flamboyant and creative. You my dear must be in pain watching her as she struggles daily with it. Peace and blessings to you, the piece you created was sad.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you, Vincent. My mom, who I am taking for her 2nd eye procedure for macular degeneration today, suffers tremendous anxiety and stress that impacts her physical health from the effects of increasing dementia. The rapid changes are alarming, not only to me, but to my mom. My BFF is now taking care of her mom, who lives with my friend and her family and suffers with alzheimers. Laura's mom was fiercely independent, never asking for help, now can no longer bathe herself. Without the "filters" that tempered their differences, Laura no longer knows the woman who raised her. She struggles with knowing whether it is the disease or the truth that is talking. I think everyone who has a parent or loved one impacted by dementia knows what it means to miss the person they knew. It is the sneakiest, most brutal of thieves. Thank you for your great compassion, Vincent. You are always a source of inspiration, comfort and love. Peace and blessings to you.


Jaggedfrost profile image

Jaggedfrost 4 years ago

It might be painful to do but it would be cool to add a stansa to represent her current state. Replacing "once" with " now ". This is a very touching peice. It reminds me of my own grandmother.


ALUR profile image

ALUR 4 years ago from USA

though this is personal, it can be seen through a universal eye and others can relate to the pain. That is the sign of a good writer.

You're welcome to read my hubs as well:)


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Jaggedfrost, I may update later, for now the struggles are ongoing, day to day, with ups and downs. Mom and I are in a state of limbo, not knowing what the next day will bring. For that reason, I didn't finalize or expound on what even today holds. Thank you for visiting and sharing that you found my piece relatable...that it touched you.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Alur, Thank you for your insightful comments. I am going to take you up on your invitation to visit your place when I get back later today.


Deborah Brooks profile image

Deborah Brooks 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

Oh Amy I am so sorry.. Your mom sounds like a wonderful person.. how old is she? the reason I ask I will be 61 next month.. and I am slowing down.. I cant do all the things I used to do.. although I still walk in the mornings and workout three times a week but you are right we slow down.. I pray for your mom Amy.. I can tell you love you her so much

blessings and sharing

Debbie


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Debbie, My mom is 84 years old. She lost her joy in life when dad died 10-years ago. Her health, with had been excellent before, allowed her to enjoy 2-mile or more walks at a quick clip everyday. Then the heart murmur she developed after strep throat and scarlet fever as a child, turned life upside down. She had bypass surgery last summer. I got a call from the ICU nurse at 10 p.m. to come to the hospital away. My mom was suffering "pumphead" common after bypass, and the nurse was afraid my mom might hurt herself. It was one of the scariest times I can recall. She was hallucinating. Sundowners became part of her life. From week to week now, I see increasing confusion. She told me recently she says her prayers every night, as she has always done, but now she prays that God takes her home. Thank you for your kindness, Debbie. We just never know what is in store for us.


BobbiRant profile image

BobbiRant 4 years ago from New York

It's very hard having the parent you love be there but not 'truly' be there anymore. But the same Mom you knew is still in there somewhere. I bless you for being a good daughter and loving her no matter what. *hugs* and *super hugs* Love ya, Bobbi


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Tough battle ahead my friend; I'm sorry for the ever-present pain. I have considerable experience with dementia and it is an ugly evaporation of the person we love. Sending you a hug and best wishes.


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

It's strange Ay bit somehow I knew this was a bout your Mom. Life can be some unfair sometimes. Take care. Up and awesome.


Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Amy - the battles rage all around you - whether its your loving mom's illness, your child's plight or your father's memory- and yet you stand in the middle, brave, cerebral, empathetic and emotive, articulate and artistic. It is you, who are the proudest warrior of 'em all. Your courage and spirit is so inspiring, it humbles me. I am so glad I know you as a friend.hugs.


Sonny Ellar profile image

Sonny Ellar 4 years ago from Saudi Arabia

I can feel the agony Amy. I wish your Family all best. Shared on FB & HP through Debbie aka Deborah Brook Langford.

Praying for you Amy!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Bobbi, I know you have firsthand experience, through your dedicated work, with the ravages of dementia. Though there are many causes, it seems progressive with aging once it begins. I definitely still see my mom aside from her confusion. It's uncanny how she remembers so many details of her childhood, yet can't remember all of yesterday. But, it is what it is and my mother is still mom. I think I am more aware now of the fact that raising me was no picnic. We are both strong willed and locked horns when I became a teenager. Mom, on the other hand, is very sweet, even more so now. We enjoy our time together immensely, laugh a lot and cry if we need to. She recently told my brother in a phone conversation (which he relayed to me) that she actually enjoys running errands now, as "I am so patient" as opposed to Aunt Shirley's leanings toward controlling behavior and impatience. It breaks my heart when my mom told me she had to run to keep up with Shirley in the grocery store. My mom seems to be able to ask me for help now with less hesitation.

My motto in most situations today is "Keep calm and carry on". It seems to help reduce my mom's anxiety. One thing at a time, one step at a time and it all gets done with less aggravation and stress. Thank you for your continuing support, Bobbi. Love you


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

We never know what the future holds. I'm enjoying helping my mom despite the fact she'd rather not have to ask for it. She may stay at the level she is...or not, but we will deal with it as we must. For now and forever, I love my mom. I will always do everything I can to help make coping with whatever she encounters better. And in turn, that makes me feel better. Thank you, my friend, Bill.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Pop, The truth for me is that I have always felt so blessed with the parents I have that I do not feel burdened, just sad that the inevitability and frailty of aging cannot be denied. If any of us had our way, of course, our loved ones would never be ill or debilitated and everyone one of us would play until the moment we dropped. I don't really ruminate about the unfairness of what is or I'd never get out of bed. I would be paralyzed by depression. But, there is too much to do, too many people to love and wonders to see, to wallow in the unfairness in life. It simply is what it is and in many important respects, I have had a wonderful life. So, I take the good with the challenges and do what I can by giving my best. My concept of karma has been bruised, but I still hope. I love your kind heart, Pop.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Beautiful Docmo, If I am a warrior, it is from watching my mom and dad. Not lecturers, but teachers, who illustrated by example. Looking back, I should have known that they believed my sister, brother and I were, with the gift of their genes, capable of figuring things out by following their lead. And, ya know what? They were right. Out of all the years in school, with many different teachers, no lessons stuck with me like the ones I saw in daily life with my parents.

The most beloved nickname ever bestowed upon me was by my fellow hubber and friend, sligobay (Gerry), who calls me "Lady Lancelot". I can't think of a more meaningful honor, which I will try to live up to the rest of my life.

Thank you, Docmo, for your generous words. I hope you and all of my friends know I do not write from a need for pity, but rather out of simple honesty. I have to say, I appreciate the outpouring of sincere compassion and understanding, as it is a constant source of strength. Love you, my friend.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Sonny, Thank you for your sincere best wishes and prayers. P.S. I love that Debbie!


always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

This brought back the memory of me taking care of my Mother after she had a massive CVA. She was like a child. I could no longer go to her for comfort. She needed my encouragement and it was so difficult. I wanted it to be like it used to be but of course it never was. She died 41 days later. Do all you can for your Mother. I look back and realize that i could have been more giving of my time..Bless you my friend


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

You are a remarkable woman, Amy, and as you can tell from the loving comments, many people including myself do feel your pain. I do regret your mother's illness but she is still a very fortunate person - she has an exceptional daghter like you to love and care for her. Try to enjoy the moments that you can - you will never regret it. Blessings to you, my dear.


Sonny Ellar profile image

Sonny Ellar 4 years ago from Saudi Arabia

Amy, Yes Debbie is a wonderful woman just like yourself. it is a privilege for me having virtual & worthy friends like the 2 of you here and I am sure there are plenty out there.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Your experience, always exploring, reminds me how lucky I am. I remember when my dad had a massive CVA. He was in a coma and died within 24 hours at the hospital. I think that was a blessing rather than watching a parent struggle only to die 41 days or sometimes years later, never to regain themselves. No matter how hard we try, there are things beyond our control. I see how loving and caring you are, always exploring, from everything you write. As much as we love our families and friends, we are still only human. While love feels limitless, each of us, one person, not God, have to accept that we are all limited, that some thing are beyond our control. You know, your mom knows and God knows that you love your mother and did everything you could.

I took my mom to her doctor appointment for the second in a series of three procedures for macular degeneration. The assistant was careless and brusk in her mannerisms and in the process did not fully numb my mother's eye. My mom felt some pain with this visit that was not part of the first appt. But, my mom tolerated it. I no sooner got home and I got a call from mom saying she was changing her clothes when she found her glasses were broke. She panicked and ran to the neighbor's house where Thelma looked at mom's glasses and immediately took her to the nearby optomistrist shop where she had purchased the frames. The man working in the store replaced the frames, and reinstalled her lenses and my mom was back in business. Thank God for neighbors like Thelma, who dropped what she was doing and helped my mom. Apparently, the assistant who was rough with my mom broke her glasses when she carelessly flung them on the counter prior to the procedure prep. My mom remembered to ask for her glasses back afterwards and I watched as the "put out" employee grabbed them off the counter by one arm of the frames and flung them at mom. The frames were very expensive and had a warranty, but it caused unnecessary stress, the neighbors time and another $50 to replace them. I am going to make sure the doctor's office knows. Even the medical community, paid well for their expertise to help, fails. I wish I could make everything less stressful for my mom, have everything go as planned, but I cannot, no matter how hard I try. All I can do is my best and even that is not enough. Yet, I must come to terms with what I cannot influence, or change.

Thank you, always exploring, for sharing your heartfelt thoughts. Bless you, too.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

My friend, drbj, thank you so much for your beautiful comment. It is ironic how, with aging, many if not most of us, revert to how we were as children. I remember the stories my mom still shares about her adventures growing up. Sharing this time with her is like watching the movie. She is the same, it is like watching her in reverse. I feel very lucky that her age related issues do not include debilitating physical pain, as that would be unbearable to watch. And, although I miss my dad terribly, I am so grateful that he did not suffer. He worked in the yard, which he loved, the day of his stroke. Relatively speaking, his death was merciful.

I truly enjoy the time I spend with mom. She and my dad gave me and my siblings a lifetime of their best. Now, I get to return the same.

Thank you, drbj, for all the caring you show me. You are a blessing to me.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Awww, thank you, Sonny. As you can see from the friends who have left me so many gifts here, you are 100% right about the number of wonderful people at hubpages.


suzettenaples profile image

suzettenaples 4 years ago from Taos, NM

Amy: I love this poem. What great work. I wish I could rhyme - I have to stick to free verse. I also love the song - one of my favorites and so appropriate and a great choice to go along with the poetry. You are so talented on so many levels. I find you one amazing woman!


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I'm so glad to hear you like this piece, Suzette. We have a mutual admiration society goin' on, as I find you to be an amazing and talented woman, too. I adore your art series. I learn something new everytime I enjoy one of your hubs. Thank you, Suzette.


rahul0324 profile image

rahul0324 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

I am sorry to here about the state of your mother Amy... but Look at you.. fighting through all the tension and load... and still going strong...

I commend your strength as well as your mother's as Dementia is something tough to struggle with

Beautiful.. powerful poetry which dashes outright and speaks volumes


dghbrh profile image

dghbrh 4 years ago from ...... a place beyond now and beyond here !!!

Amy...its me again.....your story/poem is the sign of deep strength and bonding......i will say its better to have a true meaning of life then an ordinary and wasted one. dementia is going to be conquered with your will power and your mom's strength....go ahead in life....though far apart my best wishes are always with you.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Rahul, Young poet with the heart, soul and face of an angel, your words touch me deeply. I will never forget them and whenever I have a day with doubt or despair, I will come and read them again for strength. Though we are far away, I feel connected by your kind understanding. It would be impossible to hear anything more meaningful than the gift you leave with me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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