Woman and the Infamous Head- Ache!

When men are stirred to love they find too many rules

They just are not created with communication tools

She looks in him in the eye and says, " The oven must be warmed,

you think just showing up is my reason to perform? "

He tries to understand but they just don't speak the same

She speaks in silly riddles, the man is not to blame

"You can't expect my heat to rise on nothing but a wish

a meal takes time if your to dine, I'm not a fast food dish "

Perhaps a glass of wine will simplify the chase

but "no!" in every language is written on her face

She says she's like a bank account, deposits are her fee

"the bank is closed, the vault is sealed and you don't have the key"

"You've got to prime the pump, before you take a drink

love doesn't spill upon command like water from the sink "

He stands bewildered, in a haze, what is that she wants?

If he can't understand her, how can he get response

He can't unravel her mystery, he can not fathom her need

The women speaks a language, that he's unable to read.

What can he do to understand this living rubic cube?

How can he get her ready, how does he change her mood?

The bottled wine remains uncorked and he's verbalized his plot

but all he's done is of no use, he can not warm the pot

"You must begin on Monday if you want to have your way

by Sunday I'll be ready if you've done the job each day."

"If I begin on Monday and I do my job each day

so long a wait before return seems insufficient pay

A deposit made on Monday should yield a like reward

I think you ask too much, how much can I afford?"

"What you will get on Monday earned in a single day

is nothing but the menu but you want the whole buffet"

So here is man on Monday and he's still a week away

She won't be home till Sunday and she won't come out to play

All he has is promise, a bunch of hoops and silly rules

In a week he won't remember where to put the family jewels

but, if by chance he gets there, if he doesn't make mistake

the clever women that she is, invents the infamous head ache!

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Comments 21 comments

maven101 profile image

maven101 6 years ago from Northern Arizona

I was laughing at loud all through this clever and original poem...Your line " a meal takes time if you're to dine, I'm not a fast food dish.." had me chocking on my morning coffee...My cat was giving me funny looks...

This is too funny, and probably true in many respects. It brings new meaning to the phrase " take the time to smell the roses "...Ah, such sweet vapors when love is blossoming between the sheets...

Thank you for this most enjoyable poetic treat...I'm your newest fan and look forward to your unique and stimulating prose...Larry

kirutaye profile image

kirutaye 6 years ago from London, UK

So hilarious. I couldn't stop laughing. You certainly have a way with words, the imagery just brilliant.

I will have to come back and read more of your work. Well done. :o))

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

Nice to hear from you. Actually at my age, its nice too hear period. Look forward to aquainting myself with your work.

ahorseback profile image

ahorseback 6 years ago

Beautifully spoken from a mans point of view! Ahh the trappings of the gypsy girls ! Nice write.

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

Nice meeting you. Look forward to reading your work. Thanks for the acknowledgement.

Jillian Barclay profile image

Jillian Barclay 6 years ago from California, USA

So glad that you walked with dinosaurs! The walk alone has to leave one with a sense of humor; I also lived with those amazing creatures! By the way, making a woman laugh has a tendency to cure headaches...Am sure your sense of humor is more effective than Advil!

You and your wife are so fortunate to have each other!

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

Hi Jillian! Humor is what paints my life with color in a world filled with black and white. Thanks for stopping by. Be well!

acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 6 years ago from Guildford

Imagery - totally brilliant. You have an awesome way with words - brilliant - well done!

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

Hey! nice to meet someone. At my age someone is important! If I was so brilliant, I wouldn't have to wait till sunday every week! Seriously, Thanks for stopping by and thank you for the kind comments.

acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 6 years ago from Guildford

Don't just wait for Sundays! Just 'go' for it!!!

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

I will tell her I have received authorization from a hub friend. While the stew is simmering you have time to set the table!

Be well, acaetnna

Tim 6 years ago

Alan, its good to know that your not just another pretty face........keep up the poetry and prose....and please promise to sign my copy of your first published book......looking forward to getting together with you, Randy, Keith, & Connie .....the 1st week of April 2011.

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

Thanks Tim - on the calender- leaving on cruise tomorrow!

always exploring profile image

always exploring 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

This is a really fun poem, enjoyed very much. Thank you.


azure_sky profile image

azure_sky 6 years ago from Somewhere on the Beach, if I am lucky :)

Arb....you do say the damndest things sometimes, I never know what to expect out of you!!! You keep me in stitches!

arb profile image

arb 6 years ago from oregon Author

azure sky....I don't know what to expect out of me! I wonder who I am all the time. I do know who you are and I am happy that you came by once again. Thanks for always leaving a little gift for me to unwrap!

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Wow!! Brilliant. I have to show this one to my husband he will just love it.

arb profile image

arb 5 years ago from oregon Author

Thank you again Susan. Relationships are hysterically magnetic!

shalini sharan profile image

shalini sharan 4 years ago from Delhi

you have a gift of writing amazing poetry

i am flattered sir

arb profile image

arb 4 years ago from oregon Author

Thank you shalini, I am delighted that you enjoyed reading and thank you for the gracious comment.

shalini sharan profile image

shalini sharan 4 years ago from Delhi

the pleasure was entirely mine arb

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