Just like Alexander Smith said "Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others and the delight in that recognition."
I am not different from any one of you who once got it but lost it to fate and when felt that it will never come back again, you find it crawl into you and need no one to tell you how true it is because of the fact that you recognized it just like the first time.
I was 16 when i met Angela.
She was an innocent 14years old girl, one class below me in school so it was the right time to express my affection to her because i will be leaving the school for college the coming year.I monitored her activities throughout the day and when she was leaving for the library,i walked towards her.
You could see the surprise in her
The shook in her eyes
The fear of holding my hand
The innocence in her heart
She did not understood anything i said but like what was meant to be, the innocence in us played its role and before i could told her how wonderful she was and how amazing it would be if we grow old together,we ended up playing hide and seek.
This was how we became friends and really cared for each other though i left school for college the coming year but we still met each other in a descent fashion and we were just talk of the town though so young but were well known as the best pairs in town before she turned 18.
It was not like what you see today among teens and youths who talk a lot of love but show little of it.We were just great lovers and a sound example of what you will honestly call love birds.
We did everything together and were never apart from each other and like every pair in love with dreams,all we wanted was to get married and have a family of our own,you see sometimes in life, we share so much in common with the people in our lives,i mean, i shared so much in common with Angela and honestly,we fought all tick and cloud together.
Our good and bad times were shared together and there was never a single moment we did not cherished together so this made us developed a great and strong bond which was stronger than the chain of Amistad.
Our respective families were in support of our relationship so it was not surprising to me when i graduated from Medical school and got a work at the General Hospital.My mother called me that fateful evening and told me that it was time for me to chose my bride.
Mom, i told her "There is no other lady in my life but Angela"
She made it clear to me that day that it was time i get married to Angela and begin building my own family so that was actually why we got married before she graduated from the Law school.
It was like a manna from heaven the day i wedded the love of my life and the best thing that ever happened to me.
Life without Angela will be meaningless i believed and there was no light brighter than her smiles, there was nothing as pure as her words.
Angela was sent down from Heaven,i mean she is one God's Angels.
We really did loved each other and things were going on well between us then one year afterward, we had our son Maxwell who was the juice of our union.Maxwell came at the right time and as young parents,we devoted all our energies to his upkeep but this joy if i had known would ever bring tears to my soul and everlasting grief to my life,i would have gone out with Angela and the kid that day.
I never wanted her to drive but like a new driver and the joy of her new car, she assured me that all will be well so that was actually why i allowed her to drive alone while i prepare the lunch. Of course she was a good driver but after buying the groceries and was reversing her car,the unexpected happened.
A truck crashed into her car,the driver was on a top speed and highly intoxicated, he didn't even know that his brakes were not working until he crushed my wife and son.
I got the news about the accident couple of minutes after it happened and got to the scene before the police and the ambulance arrived.Her car was crushed beyond repair and i saw blood dropping from the car,there was no way to reach them or even see them but they were in the car while the driver of the truck was lying consciously on the road side with minor injuries.
Though the driver was later convicted but that will not bring back my joy, his conviction will never bring back Angela nor my innocent three months old baby.Believe me, their death crippled me and turned me into a chaff which the wind could blow away any moment.
There was no more happiness in my life because the only thing that brought joy and meaning into my life was gone,Angela was my hands and legs and without her,life was simply meaningless then come to think of it, the tragic and painful way she died then our son too was something i needed an explanation for,I mean where was God i kept asking myself.
There was nothing to comfort me and i ended up drinking every day to help fight my depression.Everyone around me was worried and soon,my inability to cope with life began affecting my work,sometimes i forgot the surgical blade or plaster in the body of a patient,i realized that i got angry easily and was always on the verge of attacking people.
Life to me meant nothing more and going to church was the last thing in my mind because if God was so kind as i was told then he wouldn't have allowed Angela and our son to die,he would have saved them from that drunk driver who did not just killed my joy but ended my world.Believe me, i was better off dead than alive.
I honestly will tell you that i didn't know when the year came to an end,i woke up one morning and all of a sudden i heard people chanting and there were Christmas trees then i realized that it was Christmas.
Now forty years since the tragic dead of my wife and son yet i cannot give a good account of all that happened from then till now but all i knew is that,there was no friends and no one to heal my broken heart.
I have been working all these years yet cannot account for my life perhaps,anyone who has lost a wife and a son will better understand what really happened to me and what i passed through.
Now at sixty eight and just retired,life became more boring, i have a big house and nothing in the house makes me happy,all i do everyday was glance at my wife's picture and cry myself to sleep then one day,my elder brother came visiting and in his company was a lady,she was a care assistant and my immediate family wanted one for me so that at least there could be someone to help cook and take care of my laundries.
Her name was Rose and i employed her.
Rose did her work perfect and after two months of working with me,i realized that i had someone to share my pains with,she listens attentively whenever i begin to tell her about my life and the tragedy that befell my family.
I saw the pity in her and i understood that it was from her heart, she doesn't pretend and there was always a comforting word from her so with time i began to understand that life has a meaning for me and with the help of Rose,my healing began and by the time she spent six months with me,i was totally healed and have accepted the tragedy as God's plans.
Of course Rose i told her,"God was at the same place he was the day Christ died, the day Angela and our son died".
That was my comfort and Rose was a cheerful lady whose story was not different from mine,i mean sometimes things happen for a reason.
This is a woman who lost her husband on their wedding day and yet was never depressed or saddened though lonely sometimes but she gave her life to Christ and has been a care giver ever since then perhaps we have something in common and in each other,we saw comfort so it was not a surprise to her though she was 58 when i knocked at her door that evening and asked her to accompany me.
"I want to drive round the city" i told her
That was how it all began.
We drove round the city for three hours and later ended up in a restaurant to have our lunch and while in the restaurant,we kept steering at each other until i could bear it no more so i looked straight into her eyes and saw flashes of golden light coming from them,she was such an amazing woman and her hands were the softest i have ever touched.
Mary i said,"do you believe in love and love again?
Of course she was perplexed but i began telling her how wonderful she has been to me and how she has helped me healed my wounds.Mary was a powerful lady who doesn't even know the effect of her goodness toward other people,i mean she was so open that the broken hearted can find peace in her at least i did.
The song by Eric Clapton playing calmly in the restaurant was so inspiring and like something made in heaven,it seemed that it was just playing for us as we sang along and talked for hours then ended up feeding each other like lovers do and by the end of the day,it was obvious that there was truly something between us,i knew then that i will never part from her and pledged my love to her because i felt a relief the very moment i hugged her.
Then i whispered into her ears...
"Baby,you are wonderful tonight."
I love to sing but i have not sang a song for the past forty years
but today i have a song for Rose, the love of my life,my joy and
pains,my light when it is dark,i mean Rose my future wife.
Love can touch you once
And leave you lonely
But believe in your dreams
And in your actions
Because it will turn back
And when it come once more
It will take you unaware
No one will believe
But love never go away
It comes all the time
Now i have found you
And once more
I am a happy man
Chorus: Rose, you are the meaning of my life,the answer to my prayers and the strength in me,you brought it back once more in to my life and there is no one else but you.I love you.
That was just how it happened and two months after that outing,i wedded Rose.You see, love can hit you one time and go but believe me God has his ways and if you allow him the space,he will surely fill your emptiness and make you whole once more.