One More Chore

I give, and I give til there ain't no more

Alone, depleted, just everyone's whore

Your boot on my back I look to the floor

Love demands yet one more chore

==========================

Tired of being the strong hand onshore

I'm treadin' deep waters without an oar

White silence betrays the embers of war

Love demands yet one more chore

===========================

Ties that cajole slip knot out the door

No one and nowhere to run for

What game is this without a score

Love demands yet one more chore

===========================

Want to close this empty store

Devoid of what you're lookin for

But a slave will never come before

Loves demand of one more chore

==========================

Frayed, but not unwound at core

Strings that beat forevermore

And loyalty's rescue comes to the fore

When love demands one more chore

============================

Comments 24 comments

A.A. Zavala profile image

A.A. Zavala 4 years ago from Texas

I can feel the anxiety and exhaustion in this poem. Carrying loads and burdens for others is exhasting. You do so much for those who don't do anything for you. I hope you can fight on and drive on...


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Dear Augustine, Thank you for reading my words with extraordinary understanding. Life is just tough right now. I'm not making enough from my endeavors to stay in my apartment, but I'm zapped from what its taking from me. I want to "be all" to loved ones, but it seems when it comes to me, I am last. Thank you for not sending me platitudes, as the litany just doesn't matter to me now. It only adds to guilt for expressing honest feelings. Your sincerity is awesome. I need that more than anything else. I really like you, A.A.


billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

Thank you for giving voice to feelings many carry but never vocalize. May peace and happiness find your doorstep soon.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thank you for such kind, understanding words, billybuc. I appreciate your time and caring wishes.


Perspycacious profile image

Perspycacious 4 years ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

Old Chinese saying (still old, and still wise): "Where there's bad luck, good luck can't be far behind." Tests and trials make us strong, but only if we hang on until we recognize who is on our side, and how many angels He has. Yoke yourself to Him and know His burdens are light. We all have hurdles, be thankful you can see yours. Tell me what I can do to help.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I can't remember hearing someone straightforward say "Tell me what I can do to help". How totally beautiful. Just that much is help. Thank you kindly for caring, Perspycacious!


Lucky Cats profile image

Lucky Cats 4 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

My dear Amy..Oh, how I feel you words..I know all the burden that you carry for your family; mother, daughter, irresponsible ones...so many in need. Asking of you while giving you no support. If I were there, we'd go out on the town and celebrate a moment's freedom from worry and rejection. I know this has been an extended time of hardship, loss, doubt and uncertainty for you...and the one you love so much, your dear MacGregor, is having health and aging problems that are tearing at your heart and soul. Sometimes, it is just too much. This poem is a reaching out, Amy...and I know your many friends here will respond and give you a little emotional support. White light and love coming your way, Amy..for you and MacGregor!!!! Beautiful Awesome Amazing.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh, Kathy, Despite my guilt and shame admitting shortcomings that make me feel like a monster, your forgiving, understanding soul recognizes my need for rescue. I watched my dad try to be all to everyone in need, no matter the cost or the impact on his life. No matter how hard he tried to please or how far above and beyond the call of duty, he felt he never made the grade. His demanding father once told him "he had no son". He never lost his drive to recognize and be a quiet hero to the underdog, because he understood what it felt like to be "no one's son". His last day on earth, he worked in the yard, did the banking and the shopping, as usual, diverting every burden he could from my mom's world. He protected and insulated her in every way possible. And, even his death, was a silent slipping away, quickly and quiet, almost like an apology, never to inconvenience or disrupt anyone else's life. As trivial as this sounds, Kathy, I remember having a conversation with him about key lime pie. He'd never tried it and asked me if I had. I told him it was one of my favorites. His last shopping trip, I discovered he'd bought one when my mom asked my brother, sister and I if we wanted a piece as we sat at her table together during a visit after his funeral. I quickly asked my mom if dad had even tried the pie. She brushed my question aside, saying yes, he'd tried it, although I could see the key lime pie was uncut. I still cry when I think that even that one small yearning to try something he'd looked forward to, after a lifetime seeking to make everyone else's life better, was denied. It still makes me cry.

Thank you, Kathy, for letting me tell you this story about my hero, my dad. It makes me realize why I keep trying. Me and MacGregor send you our love for being a caring and true friend. I think my dad is watching out for me still by sending you in my direction.


Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Voted up and awesome. It's never easy if we have to toil for others and it can seem even more exhausting than when we toil just for ourselves.However if we can be a strong support for someone then in the end it all makes it worthwhile.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

So true, Gypsy Rose Lee. It just becomes overwhelming. I'm just one person, without a job now for 2 years due to the economy right after a divorce. I run to help my elderly ex mother-in-law, my mom and my daughter. I'm not making enough to support myself, but the responsibility and the time involved has me completely tied. Soon, when I'm on the streets, I won't be able to sustain supporting others needs. My mom, being the only one with the space and means to take me in, will not allow my canine companion into her home. Abandoning him is not an option. When everything becomes a struggle, it's human to wonder if somehow you've fallen off of God's radar.

I always look forward to your visits, Gypsy. Thank you for your support.


Perspycacious profile image

Perspycacious 4 years ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

Every hair of your head is counted, and a dog is even more visible than a falling sparrow. Life is the art of doing the impossible when it has to be done. Just do it. Save enough strength to tie a knot at the end of the rope and hang on. It isn't the end yet. Ditch the butts, and if you are not asking for help, that might be why it isn't at hand.


writinginalaska profile image

writinginalaska 4 years ago from southeast Alaska

pricless and powerful stuff. thank you for providing the back story too in the comments section. wow! lvh


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Perspycacious, I've always been independent and happy to be capable of taking care of my life. Two years ago, everything changed at an age where I hoped to relax a bit. My divorce finalized at the same time I was laid off from the security of a job I'd excelled at for 13-years. I am now far more isolated as poverty does that to a person. The friends that told me they'd help me move, disappeared. The only help I can get is to pay for it, no longer possible. No excuses, no buts, just the facts. I'll deal with it, just as I have all my life.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Thanks, writinginalaska! It's been a trip! Thanks for your visit and generous comment.


Lucky Cats profile image

Lucky Cats 4 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

Amy, oh, what a story (story..not the right word; for the life of me, I cannot come up w/the right one, but I know you understand.) what a beautiful relating of your love for your father. A kind, generous, selfless and diminishing soul on earth...a very very rewarded and recognized soul in the afterlife...it is a shame that life is as it is. Simply put...sometimes, life sucks..sometimes it is just not fair. I spend much time trying to understand how we, such intricate, detailed, magnificantly created beings, can waste this gift on beng so narrow and cold and cruel...to one another, to those we should love the most...to our children and, of course , to our animals. I'll NEVER understand the disconnect between parents and children; how parents, who have brought into the world a part of themselves and unique being at the same time, can treat this new life with such disregard and cruelty. I think that's why I choose not to have kids...because of what I saw as a very young child and up through adulthood. The example I had was not one to encourage repetation. You are SO incredibly deep and intelligent and caring...a child to grown woman whose parents should hold in highest esteem and with great pride. Sometimes, I think jealousy plays into this dynamic; particularly between fathers/sons and mothers/daughters...unfortunately. Oh, I could go on but, we know that we know, huh? Anyway, keep MacGregor close; to me, he is your #1 in all aspects...others should follow through loving example of unselfish love. Otherwise...they LOSE. Keep your chin up...I know this is easy to say from 2,200k miles away but, just know that you have so many friends here who really care about your well being. Allow that to sustain you. Your friend, Kathy


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I understand every nuance of what you are saying, Kathy. Every word resonates with authenticity, sincerity and deep understanding. I treasure you for your extraordinary ability to feel for every living thing that is hurting. I look at the world today and am amazed at the hope that remains in the faces of expectant mothers. Of course, this is the way life is supposed to be, but I remember my delay and trepidation about having a child, even back in the day. Now, the world feels more "dog eat dog". We are influenced, of course, by what we experience. The turn of events I have encountered have taught me a lot about the fact we are all are responsible for ourselves and in the end, at this moment, I feel alone trying to stay afloat navigating murky waters. Yet, thinking of my dad, I know he is with me. And, I thank God for friends, such as you and my close friend in N. Carolina. And, even though I get the expected responses from my sister in Hawaii and my brother in Cali, I am still surprised at their unwillingness to understand. They have suggestions, but words from family are irrelevant with no involvement. It is disheartening and always leads me back where I started...alone. Thank you, my friend, for listening...really listening. That means everything.

I wanted to tell you, Kathy, that my dad had a black Scottie he adored. Everytime I look into the coal black, sparkling eyes of my MacGregor, I am struck by how much my dad would love him, too. And, everytime I look at my sweet companion, I feel the connection between me and my dad. I remember that everything happens for a purpose.


drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

I was very worried for you, Amy, as I read the first four stanzas of your heart-wrenching poetry. But then I read your next line: 'Frayed, but not unwound at core.' and knew you will be all right. You come from strong stock like your dad and will find the strength to overcome adversity.

Nothing in life is guaranteed to us any more, like a job, a steady income and good friends, but in fact they never were. We just thought they were. You are strong and beautiful and intelligent and you will move on to better things. I know that.

Here's a coincidence: I, too, had a black Scottie when I was a teenager - he was a hero. Saved my family when a fire broke out one night as everyone was asleep.


Lucky Cats profile image

Lucky Cats 4 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

amy, your father loved a dog so similar to MacGregor...that he did so elevates him to greater heights! My father, when he lived w/me for the last of his 2 years, fell in love with my cats "PM" and Gray. they shared his couch and shared his bed and followed him everywhere. When hospitalized, on the many numerous occasions; he'd always ask of them and how he couldnot wait to be home and with them. Their bodies are buried with him...(long story and not appropriate for here ).

I, like you, am dismayed and saddened by the state of human affairs. We tread on one another, use each other, take advantage and feed off another's weakness. Very unfortunate. Competition, anger, fear...these are the motivating factors. I have a hard time imagining what the future will hold for the very young children of today; with global famines, waning resources and monetary woes...it has begun, already; as far as I can see. Rather like the 'Tower of Babel,' also....we cannot seem to find a common ground or understanding. It is as if we were all speaking foreign and unknown languages. Anyway, how negative can I be, for God's sake? Sometimes, it surely does feel like a

dog eat dog world. We must spread positive and loving ways...

I wonder shy those family members who are better situated will not come forward to relieve some of the burden which is on your shoulders. Sadly, if one assumes responsiblity in family matters; they soon find themselves towing the entire load. You have my support ..anytime...

Kathy


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Oh, drbj, a black Scottie, I don't want to sound like a "flake", but I have a significant positive attachment to that adorable, distinctive breed. They remind me in so many ways of my dad...those eyes, their small but powerful stature and mighty demeanor, their quiet, reserved dignified nature and now you add "hero". I don't believe in coincidences, dear drbj. Your message to me touches me and gives me courage...even more, as you see that in me. Thank you for bouying my spirit, my dear friend.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

I find you very positive, Kathy, always striving to make the world better. If you were negative, you wouldn't put forth effort, but rather, concede in defeat.

My predilection to Scottish Terriers, more than likely, stems from my dad's delight in everything about his. His MacGregor died after I'd left home. My mom said the vet was worried about my dad when they took Mac for an ongoing problem and got the diagnosis of end-stage bladder cancer. The shock left my dad inconsolable (which I had never seen in all the years growing up)to the point that the vet would not allow dad in with his best friend while he was euthanized. My parents never had another dog.

Thank you so much, Kathy, as you've lifted my spirits with your understanding and compassion. I feel "good to go", ready to, once again, tackle the world, although I know there will be some trying times ahead. But, with a little help from my friends, (o.k., a lot of help), things will turn out the way they are supposed to. Again, much love sent your way, Lucky Cats!


Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Ah Amy, the burdens you carry, the extraordinary adversities you undergo and yet brave them with such spirit, your strength and the sweet vulnerability underneath - this poem sears the mind with all that and more. Powerful and passionate, frayed and vulnerable, but never one to cower under these adversities. You are an inspiration to us all. And you, my friend, are in need a of a big, warm, long, cosy hug. xoxoxo .

BTW as drbj has already observed, I am curious about your Jock-spotting ability ;-)


Vincent Moore 4 years ago

Amy I dare not disturb the peace, love and sincerity shown above these my words. You my friend have been tested beyond measure, your love stretched to outer limits, your perseverance admired by so many who have no strength to carry on. I am sad for events in your life, why we are tested these ways no one will ever know but our maker.

Please know that although I am not often here, I am in your corner and always will feel your heart beat. You mentioned your father and the words "Nobody son" those words impacted my soul, I've felt the same all my life, I never had a true father nor the love from one. It's been a struggle in my life and I so missed having a real daddy. You were blessed to have his love.

Please dear friend stay strong as this to in time will pass and the sun will shine and a new day will appear for you and lift those dark clouds that linger with you. I pray that life will improve for you, be strong, I know you are a fighter and survivor. Hugs.


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Sweet, smart, funny, Docmo. I find the comments like little yet significant snippets, like photographs or short films, that illustrate the writers here...just as telling as the stories written. From my vantage point, I see that you and drbj are "smart as whips", understanding without a nuance left uncovered. Humor, as seen in the best comedians, is an artform. At it's best, it is subtle, yet relatable. If I had to predict, from what I know participating here, I would have guessed the "jock" would have left both you and drbg wondering. I laughed out-loud at both your references to it. It feels great to laugh, as would a big, warm, long, cozy hug (I just learned "cosy" and "cozy" are both correct). BTW, Docmo, my daughter surprised me with a UK copy of Cosmo and I am finding the differences in phrases and spelling more interesting that the content! Thank you for the love in your time, understanding and care, Mohan. xoxoxo


Amy Becherer profile image

Amy Becherer 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO Author

Vincent, As I read your comment, I felt your sincerity and your words rang so true as I have been experiencing the transformation that challenges bring. I am stronger now. I am not beat. Each hill I climb increases my courage in tackling the next, as I know as long as we live, there will be challenges for all of us that make the last look like a molehill. In reading your words, I am reminded that each of us is put here for a purpose. Ashamed, I must admit, my life had issues, but, they were mosquito bites, not mountains. Who am I to question what's on my plate now? Your comment makes me grateful that I am physically able to help the one's than need me now. That is not a given, but a gift. I feel ready now to pick up my sword and live up to the nickname I love, bestowed by sligobay, "Lady Lancelot". I'm gonna slay me some dragons! Hugs to you

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working