Passing Windows

Source


She was tumbling towards the asphalt,

her sanity stalling,

she was free-falling

with a frantic sobbing breath,

she will know death,

every fiber of her body

was aching to survive,

to stay alive,

as death was oh so near,

sweat seeped out

beneath her matted hair,

it tried to soothe the skin,

but she was helpless,

life was dim,

and her shadow would shout,

brushing up against passing windows,

on it’s way down,

plunging faster towards the ground,

the air that covered her frame

was thin,

it just couldn’t hold her up,

a sin was a sin,

before she left,

she had cleaned her house,

did some laundry,

and cooked a meal,

but the last thing she remembered

was jumping from the window sill,

her chest throbbed,

but her arms shuddered and grew still,

life robbed,

she struggled, blood splattered,

she crashed with such force,

everyone around heard the bones shatter,

and only ghosts continued the mute chatter.

© 2011 Frank Atanacio

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Comments 32 comments

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 5 years ago from Ontario, Canada

Good Morning Frank,

Dark indeed. I enjoyed it. I could almost feel what this woman did.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 5 years ago from Shelton Author

Thanks so much Just Ask Susan...


asmaiftikhar profile image

asmaiftikhar 5 years ago from Pakistan

Mute chatter a wonderful expression.voted up dear!


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 5 years ago from Shelton Author

thanks asma :)


Eiddwen profile image

Eiddwen 5 years ago from Wales

Only one word here Frank; Brilliant !!!!

Thanks for sharing and take care.

Eddie.


Sky9106 profile image

Sky9106 5 years ago from A beautiful place on earth.

What a beautiful morning it is , surely started with a bang.

blood splattered,

she crashed with such force,

everyone around heard the bones shatter,

Brilliance from the roaming mind of the one and only ,

Frank , with that patented last name.

A beautiful roll this day.

Bless.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 5 years ago from Shelton Author

Thanks Eidd.. and Sky you always say the right thing


AudreyHowitt profile image

AudreyHowitt 5 years ago from California

Very cool write Frank--I loved it and I loved the last line--


Deborah Brooks profile image

Deborah Brooks 5 years ago from Brownsville,TX

wow Frank. this was so deep and a little dark but good.. Awesome frank.


time2rite profile image

time2rite 5 years ago from Navarre, Fl, USA

Frank, I voted "Up" and "Awesome" on this one too ;-) I could feel my heart pounding and my arms flailing as I read this; very realistic imagery!


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 5 years ago from Shelton Author

thanks Audrey you too Our Ms Brooks and time to rite you guys r the best!


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 5 years ago from Portland, Oregon

Wow, great work. very dramatic. Well done!


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 5 years ago from Shelton Author

thanks PDX for stopping by too :) Cheers


PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

PDXKaraokeGuy 4 years ago from Portland, Oregon

you're welcome, frank. anytime!


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton Author

:) @ PDX


John Sarkis profile image

John Sarkis 4 years ago from Los Angeles, CA

Profound, yet spooky in an eerie sort of way. I'm into the "Final Destination" movies and your poem reminded me of them a bit.

voted up

John


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton Author

Yeah I just rented final 5 the preqeal it was good thanks John...Frank


TToombs08 profile image

TToombs08 4 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

Frank, you always paint a wonderfully vivid scene with your poetry. So very interesting to read. VUM. :)


Cyndi10 profile image

Cyndi10 4 years ago from Georgia

Hi Frank, Great poem, just as I anticipated.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 18 months ago from Shelton Author

TTombs thank you so much for your support bless you and cyndi10 thanks for always commenting bless you too :) Frank


Vellur profile image

Vellur 18 months ago from Dubai

Deep and dark, great write.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 18 months ago from Shelton Author

thank you Vellur


Jodah profile image

Jodah 18 months ago from Queensland Australia

Wow Frank, thanks for reshaping this amazing poem. It gave me the shivers. The title and the last two lines are perfect. Voted up.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 18 months ago from Shelton Author

hey thanks Jodah.. for the passing by


Benny01 profile image

Benny01 18 months ago from Lagos, Nigeria

'Everyone around heard her bones shattering' that line got me. And it seems there is nothing they could do to help her.. Its really an interesting poem, thanks for sharing.


Phyllis Doyle profile image

Phyllis Doyle 18 months ago from High desert of Nevada.

Chilling ... I held my breath till the end. Very well written, Frank.


lisavanvorst profile image

lisavanvorst 18 months ago from New Jersey

Wow, awesome hub Frank. You did it again. Keep on writing!


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 18 months ago from Shelton Author

thanks so much Benny01, Phyllis Doyle, and Lisavanvorst for stopping by and checking out my passing windows :)


James-wolve profile image

James-wolve 18 months ago from Morocco

Beautiful Hats off to you.Congrats!


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 18 months ago from Shelton Author

thanks James Wolve


word55 profile image

word55 18 months ago from Chicago

Whoa Frank, that was an expert description of an unfortunate mishap. Thanks for sharing buddy.


Frank Atanacio profile image

Frank Atanacio 18 months ago from Shelton Author

thank you so much word55

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