She Doesn't Know Me Anymore

People With Memory Disorders

For a couple of weeks I've been working with people who have different kinds of memory disorders. Their reality is so different from my reality. Working with these wonderful people have affected me in many ways. In this poem I'm trying to express some of the feelings.

THIS POEM IS NOT ABOUT MY OWN MOTHER. It could be about any mother in the world suffering from Alzheimer's disease.

My Mother

She doesn't know me anymore

Every time we meet

I have to tell her my name.

I have to tell her that I'm her daughter.

And she looks at me

and her eyes tell me ”maybe I've met you before”.

She doesn't speak anymore.

She can't take care of her hygiene anymore.

She can't hold a spoon anymore.

With some help from me she can take some steps.

She's walking from the bed to the chair.

She's walking from the chair to the bed.

And for the rest of the day

she's sitting in her wheelchair

and she's sleeping in her bed.

She reads my body language.

She claps her hand on the chair.

She enjoys listening to music.

She is still my mother.

It's now been many years since she met

Mr. Alzheimer for the first time.

He has affected her life in many ways

and now there isn't much time left.

Alzheimer's disease took my mother from me

and soon I'm losing her for good.

She doesn't know me anymore.

My mother doesn't even know

her own daughter anymore.

Music Can Help You Communicate

I really recommend you to watch the video below.

More by this Author

Comments 26 comments

carter06 profile image

carter06 3 years ago from Cronulla NSW

This has to be the saddest thing to endure, surely?? Beautifully & painfully expressed, Made. Thank you for sharing the often downside of a mothers love..cheers

DDE profile image

DDE 3 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

It is hard to cope with person and if it is your mother even more such wonderful words expressed here about She Doesn't Know Me Anymore. A heartfelt video

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi carter06, it's so sad. I know some people in my age (30+), who has only one parent left and he or she has Alzheimer's disease. I can't imagine what it would be like. Thank you for reading and leaving a comment.

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

DDE, it would be sad to lose your mother in a disease like this. I love the video and wanted to share it. Sometimes singing helps you to communicate with people who suffer from memory disorders. I haven't tried it myself yet. Thank you!

billybuc profile image

billybuc 3 years ago from Olympia, WA

Made, my best friend has Alzheimer's...he is only 52 years old and he is sinking rapidly.....this is an incredibly sad disease and you captured it perfectly in this poem. Well done my friend, and I hope you had a wonderful Mother's Day.

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Bill, that's so sad. At that age you should have so many years left of your life to enjoy. Thank you for stopping by once again!

I've had a good Mother's Day. Even the weather has been good. The only thing missing is one of my cats who has been missing for two days. Have a nice day, Bill! :)

bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 3 years ago from Central Florida

Made, my heart breaks for you and your mom. The video you include in this hub is endearing and heartwarming. Thank you for sharing your story.

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi bravewarrior, this poem is not about my own mom, and I'm so thankful for that. But all those women with a memory disorder is usually somebody's mom and all the men are usually somebody's dad. Thank you!

btrbell profile image

btrbell 3 years ago from Mesa, AZ

Made, beautiful, emotional poem and so frightening. Thank you for this enlightening video. I saw you answer to Bill. One of our kitties went missing a couple of months ago. We found him after 5 days when we offered a reward. Since then, everybody is getting microchips! Good luck! Happy Mother's Day! up,++

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi btrbell, it is very frightening. Thank you for stopping by. I hope my cat (she's almost 9 years old) is in one of our neighbours' barns and that she's coming home soon.

Just Ask Susan profile image

Just Ask Susan 3 years ago from Ontario, Canada

My grandmother who raised me was the same as your mother. She thought I was my cousins boyfriend one time at a big family dinner. So sad. My heart goes out to both you and your mother.

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi Just Ask Susan, I'm sorry to hear that and it's so sad. This is not about my own mother. It can be about anybody's mother. Thank you!

tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 3 years ago from New York

I have seen this first-hand, a friend's father had Alzeheimer's really bad, and now my mother-in-law is in beginning stages. You have captured the essence of this soul sucker. Beautifully done.

Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Thank you tillsontitan. It must be hard to be close to someone with this disease. It's also scary that more and more people are diagnosed with some kind of memory disorder. We need to be prepared to take care of everybody in the future... I really appreciate that you stopped by.

Faith Reaper profile image

Faith Reaper 3 years ago from southern USA

My precious mother had dementia and it is a very hard thing to endure and watch a loved one suffer with such, but then she had times of clarity, which were blessings, especially right there at the end of her life, it was as though she was the mother we had always known.

Voted up ++++ and sharing

Blessings, Faith Reaper

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi Faith Reaper, if your mother had dementia, I'm sure you can relate to this hub. I'm glad there were some moments of clarity. Thank you so much! Your comment means a lot to me.

Mhatter99 profile image

Mhatter99 3 years ago from San Francisco

Powerful! The strength to draw such a heartfelt picture. thank you

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Thank you Mhatter99. I always appreciate your comments.

Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 3 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Voted up. Very expressive it is a sad thing when mom is there yet she isn't. You're right could be about anyone's mom. My mom had sclerosis in her head and she was so confused before she passed away. In a way I had already lost her. I am an only child but she kept asking me where my other two sisters were and once a question that made me sadly realize the whole situation when mom asked me Where were you born?

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi Gypsy Rose Lee, I'm sorry to hear that. It must be hard to see your own mother change that much. Thank you for sharing. I really appreciate that you stopped by to read this. Thank you!

profile image

Ausseye 3 years ago

Hi Made you made Australia proud:

My you have caught a moment in Australian history where our past Leader’s wife died suffering from Alzheimer’s and she was so, so much better than her hubby who was da leader…..she was a gem who shone because she was real…very politically incorrect ….but your poem struck a note. He had married another and they were divorced….he was asked to meet her at the death bed for the last time…he did……he sang her a song …spent a few hours with her……and when he left she said “ I love you”….and then your poem!!!!!

A silent world I am enclosed

People come and people go

My younger world was filled with song

Of love, liberty and equality strong

And then you came and gave me melody

So, so strong to make my memory

I love you, yes and listen yet

For what we were, we had and might have been

I leave this place a happier person

Because the song has made us strong……

Loved the plea of recognition !!!!!!

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi Ausseye, interesting! I was totally unaware of the fact that I caught some of the Australian history in this poem. I think every person can relate to this poem in his/her own way. I'm glad you shared this story. Thank you so much!

epigramman profile image

epigramman 3 years ago

It's always so nice to hook up with you my dear Madeleine and I love your new profile picture.

This is one of the most moving poetic pieces I've ever read and it reminds me very much of my best friend - my mum and luckily for her she was lucid and clear until the day she died.

Also words like these cannot be written unless they come from a beautiful heart and that heart belongs to you , the lady author of this brilliant work.

Sending to you my warmest wishes from Colin and his cats Tiffy and Gabriel at lake erie time ontario canada 7:28am and hoping that both you and your beloved family are well.

Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi Colin, so nice to see you here! Thank you for all your kind words. They make me warm inside.

Your heart is beautiful, too. I can see that in all your brilliant writing. I feel really happy now, but I miss one of my cats, which suddenly disappeared a month ago.

I'm sending you sunshine from Finland and wishes to your cats Tiffy and Gabriel from my cats Tyson, Dipsy and Justus. :)

old albion profile image

old albion 3 years ago from Lancashire. England.

Hi Made. You bring a tear to my eye with this heartfelt hub. Your wonderful character shines through the heart breaking words. Thank you.

voted up and all.


Made profile image

Made 3 years ago from Finland Author

Hi old albion, thank you so much. Your words are so kind.

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