Sounds

Waiting for my love to remember me

Now that time weighs heavily on her hands.

Something given and taken,

While mine was a gift;

A gift, a sacrifice to a lost cause.

Playing songs saturated with memories,

And too well remembered incidents.


Send the lute player away

And let me hear the plangent tone

Of a lonely woman singing;

In faded silks and fine things

Blowing in a moist, early evening breeze.

Few people in the room now;

And a young man crying.


They sent me flowers on my loss,

And the roses smelled as of stale wine

And cigarettes in a dark room at dawning.

So long; so long until the night

Ends sorrow for a brief few hours.

And a young man crying.

More by this Author


Comments 65 comments

kallini2010 profile image

kallini2010 5 years ago from Toronto, Canada

Sad, but beautiful. "My heart has wings..."

- Perhaps, another cup of coffee, Sir?


Lucky Cats profile image

Lucky Cats 5 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

Beautiful poem of sorrow....accompanied by an empty coffee cup and burnt out cigarette...the symbols of loneliness, emotional fatigue, forfeiture, sadness....such a melancholy state of affairs. Beautiful, Awesome UP


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Svetlana, Espresso, per piacere!

I'm glad you were the first to read it. This really moves me.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Lucky Cats. I am grateful that you could see all that. It really pleases me to reach someone on that level.


mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

TL. Waiting, but not with tears. Waiting with a smile. The music accented the mood.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I love Billie Holiday. She's really one of my favourite jazz singers.

Thanks for the visit. Mike.

By the way, I heard you're serving Battenberg at the café, is that right?


Sunnie Day 5 years ago

Something about Billy Holiday..she can move the heart so much..Lonely and lost..feels it is the end of the world..just sits numb and the tears cannot even flow..really good Ian...

Hugs,

Sunnnie


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Yea, I love her singing. She was amazing.

Do you know strange fruit? Stunningly sad and moving song. Not for the faint hearted.

Ian

x


Sunnie Day 5 years ago

I will have to go listen..Thanks Ian..Have a good night..


franciaonline profile image

franciaonline 5 years ago from Philippines

Wow, what a beautiful poem!


Rosemay50 profile image

Rosemay50 5 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

Exquisite poem and imagery. Beautiful but very sad.


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 5 years ago

The things that bring memories to mind, sad though beautiful memories of what we once had, shared and loved together. Loneliness in a room, smoking and drinking ate at my soul as old Jack tasted bitterly good to soothe what I had lost or didn't have with me in that dim of my lonely room.

My heart ached for her and I cried alone, so very alone. My soul empty, my heart aching, the stench of loss so prominent. Oh the blues of Billie always haunts my poet's soul....Loved your work, it moved me.....


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

And Wow! How nice of you to say so. I thank you sincerely, Franciaonline.

Please come again, and see what else I have to offer.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Welcome again, Rosemay. So lovely to see you here. I hope you will continue to honour me with your visits.

You are always welcome.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

A beautiful, beautiful touching comment.

Saddlerider, your loss sticks out like a raw wound, thank you for commenting so elegantly and beautifully on my effort.


steve of ian fame profile image

steve of ian fame 5 years ago from Essex

your interlect is way above mine.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

It may well be, but what about my intellect?


Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 5 years ago from Hereford, AZ

Beautifully melancholy, so sad. I loved it.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

This has the essence of so many bittersweet shards of life remembered and strangely enjoyed in that melancholia bordering on self-pity and a kind of delight at having been there, done that - and survived.

Your words are chosen like jewels and set into their piece of jewelry with the precision and artistic impulses of a great jeweler, not a mismatch or a nanometer off perfection. I really am awed by your grace in writing. You must not hide it under any barrels!

I love "These Foolish Things" - part of my own personal memory trove - and with Billy Holliday singing it - just exactly right for this poem, down to the tinkling piano in the background.

Again - my excuse for tardiness is that I wasn't notified - but how glad I am that I came in search of an Ian-fix!


acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 5 years ago from Guildford

Beautifully written and very powerful. Your work certainly brought a few tears to my eyes. So very sad, to be so lonely and lose the one you love. Perfect imagery. Voting up and pressing those buttons.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I'm glad you liked it, Becky. I also like melancholia. But every time I read it (and I've read it a hell of a lot of times) I think, "Where's the rest of it?"

Maybe I should have a think about that... or leave well alone.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Nellie, you are so kind. I am beginning to see where my strengths lie, when I read your comments, and I think that it is time I wrote some more. I also love, as I said to Becky, melancholia and I also love the feel of gentle decadence, so I'm going to get a pack of writing crayons (We're not allowed to have sharp implements here; Nurse Smythe says that sometimes we get a bit excited) and I'm going to try and whack out some more stuff!!!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you so much for your visit, your generous comments and your button pushing.

I noticed, last night, that you have posted a poem... I know it is going to be lovely, and I am going over there shortly to enjoy it.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Ian - oh yes!! Do it! You may choose any crayon color your inspiration demands ,- be it melancholy charcoal gray or decadent Schiaparelli pink!

What I so love about your work is its ability to arouse all the emotions including the "dark" ones, but somehow to leave one feeling the better for it. That is most rare. We might learn to attune ourselves out of the pits of despair into which some writings would otherwise plunge us, leaving us to falter and flail down there, but so few can take us on a guided tour and bring us safely back to the surface afterward, still aware and affected by the journey, but not bruised and battered by it. Perhaps it's due to your own buoyancy.

Whatever it is, you must indulge your writing tools to explore every nook and crayonny and poke into the bistros and boudoirs (or wherever one finds decadence that's gentle, not trite) to bring to light. Think how engrossed Nurse Smythe will get in it ,- giving you the more moments of freedom from her all-seeing eyes!


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

PS - I just today (Saturday) received the email notifications of your latest hubs! I won't put my trust in that any more!! The hubs have been out for days already! Hrmph!

Oh - and by the way - I watched "Australia" (again) today. I end up crying. That precious little half-aboriginal boy is just so adorable.

Also listened to my stepson's DJ radio program and loved the music.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Your first comment today is possibly one of the best bits of writing I have read for a very long time. It was deep, it was funny, it was elegant, it was everything I aspire to and more.

I laughed, I smiled (They are different, you know) I felt all sorts of emotion. it was lovely.

Bless you, my dear friend, I cannot believe how lucky I am to have have met you... we all, on Hub Pages, are.

And a little bit more enws:

The story ('The Potter') which I have been unable to write for so many months, started again, and I wrote about 300 words last night. That is a lot for me, so I hope I have been kick started and I can finish it.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Thank you for such a lovely accolade. See how you inspire me!?

I know "The Potter" will be great. With a title like that, it's already half-way there. (My two dearest friends in the world when I needed them desperately, & who recognized my poetry as poetry, were potters by profession and dedication.)


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

If you hear a scream of anguish, it will be me. I am having so much trouble with my phone. I just can't get e-mail connection or even get a simple picture through to facebook. It keeps on telling me to re-boot... I'll give it a genuine boot. Right through the window.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

'The Potter' reads as if it is allegorical, but it isn't an allegory, unless one wants to read into it.

I'll send you a little bit, if you like, and you can tell me if you think it's worth pursuing.


rebekahELLE profile image

rebekahELLE 5 years ago from Tampa Bay

Melancholy feeds the soul, it is part of life's emotional landscape. Without it, we forget how to feel.

I love every word, every image as I read.

I also love the title.

Beautiful, Twilight.


QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 5 years ago

"It is our sadness that makes us who we are; for had it been mere happiness, not many of us would have been poets."

- Qudsia Pervez


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Rebekah, I thank you for your elegant comment. It really inspires me. "Melancholy feeds the soul, it is part of life's emotional landscape. Without it, we forget how to feel." If you see that used in one of my hubs, donlt be angry, please. It encapsulates how I feel.

Thank you again.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Qudsia. It is the sadness that brings out what is best in me. When I am happy, I write verse. When I am sad, I write poetry.


QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 5 years ago

Then you know exactly what I am talking about. :)

Empower your being by your scars; be proud of who you have become because you have turned out into a remarkable being. :)


Angie Jardine profile image

Angie Jardine 5 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

I couldn't possibly add anything to the eloquent comments above, m'dear ... just know that I agree with them ... and that I always, but always, read your work and love it.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Angie. I appreciate that from someone who writes so well herself.

I have bogged down with my sanitised version of 'Lettice Goes to Cornwall', but there are some slightly amusing versions beginning to raise their less than ugly heads.


Angie Jardine profile image

Angie Jardine 5 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

Let me know if you want any lunatic input with 'Lettice goes ...'


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I'm getting some ideas. They involve tie dyed fabrics, pulses, sandals and faded floral prints, and a rather large lady truck driver called Steve.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Your ideas for Lettice (with which I'm unfamiliar, though) sound inspired. It will sparkle!

And please do send me any of "The Potter" you would entrust to me!

About your current electronic troubles:

I've had many glitches with HP today. In fact for several days, it will NOT remember my sign-in info, though I check the box "remember me". Each time I click it up, though I've been online the whole time, it requires me to re-sign in. Or even more frustrating it may let me move ahead normally and then suddenly revert to asking for my ID again. Then it's been flakey about bringing up pages, as well. I think it's them, not my computer. Other things are behaving normally. Of course my computer tends to be touchy in flipping from where I'm typing to somewhere else. Repeatedly I must find it and start over again, and am sort of used to it and expecting it. I've mentioned that I usually compose offline and copy and paste, so all will not be gobbled up and lost. It's in emails and elsewhere, too. But then if I edit on the actual online place, it may just jump away and lose the new stuff. Sometimes I am philosophical about it and think that was 'meant to be' lost.

I think my long online history has inured me to such occurrences. I've had to start over with entire webpages when the timing elapsed without warning, for instance. But the business of the loss of ID is a different kind of kink.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

I've had the same trouble with the signing in business also.

Never mind.

I shll send the first bit of 'The Potter' tomorrow. It is only 1:25 but suddenly I am very tired and I have a feeling that RLS is about to bite, and I'll have to get a packet of Persil to scatter in my bed (only joking, but I am very tired for some reason).

Good night.

Hugs


Angie Jardine profile image

Angie Jardine 5 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

Really? Pulses and prints? Okay ... sounds fascinating. I will send you a possible cure for RLS via back office mail - I've just got to dig it out of the cupboard when I've finished morning mail time.

And HP is being a complete arse with me too ... having to log in all the time ... pages not loading etc ... it is definitely them, guys.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Lettice had a bout of RLS once, but Maude wouldn't countenance any of that nonsense. Maude has a very proactive attitude to "maladies of the mind" as she likes to call all troubles to which the Girls are prone.

So she sent Lettice up onto the roof of the West Wing, maintaining that Ghastly Prendy was up there; preparing to throw down a few square yards if slates, as is her wont.

So Lettice, remembering the battle Cry of the Rogers-Allbodys, ("Bugger You Jack, I'm First in Line"), scaled the ladder and gained access to the roof. The door was locked after her (Maude's doing) and Lettice found herself on the roof, not with Ghastly Prendy, who happened to be sleeping with Raj's Black Orpingtons that evening, and in fact, most of that week, but with Mrs Orme-Wilde.

Mrs Orme-Wilde wasn’t wearing her best false teeth, but it was a full moon, and the wind was from the South. Poor Lettice found her way down eventually, perhaps she jumped, one will never know. But the poor dear was somewhat the worse for wear, badly mauled, but apparently completely over her RLS.

Hasn’t reoccurred since.


Angie Jardine profile image

Angie Jardine 5 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

Wonderful ... so now you know what to do, our kid!


Nikkij504gurl profile image

Nikkij504gurl 5 years ago from Louisiana

I've lost a few loved ones, to death and other. and to lose someone is always such a hard thing to go through and get over, but as for the deceased, you will meet again, hopefully, one day. So yes wait with a smile as mckbirds said. Save those tears for a happy reunion. Beautiful poem. like i said, i love when you write poems. They always come out so eloquently.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Nicki for those well chosen and heartfelt words. You are rigth, Mike always seems to see into the heart of what I write... as you have here. also.

Thank you. again.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Ah, Ian, dear heart. Hope you're rested up or resting up, sans RLS.

In an odd way, Angie - it's good to know it is not "just me" having these glitches! :) One wouldn't think it would be good that they're wide-spread, though, except that it's their responsibility to fix - hopefully!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Maybe, Angie and Nellie, it would be easier for them to fix if it were constant. I can spend ages on the confuser and it all works well, and then it "signs me out" or makes two identical comments... Don't blame the HP team. Blame the e-gremlins.


steve of ian fame profile image

steve of ian fame 5 years ago from Essex

Coffee and cigarettes were a big part of your life at one stage and you left them for better things. Now your teacherism, a form of received behaviour too dominates your personality. How many spelling errors and grammatical errors can you find on this page? Life is meaningless without these precious things.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Wacko!

Yes, you Steve.


Sunnie Day 5 years ago

I thought I was Wacko..not Steve too!!!


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Much as I resist admitting it, the fact that I am and we are all still here putting up with all that stuff is surely ample proof of individual and group wackiness!


Randy Behavior profile image

Randy Behavior 5 years ago from Near the Ocean

TL you are writing poetry again and I am delighted. What I took from this was an attitude of, "leave me to my melancholy, I like the taste of it."


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you for the visit. I think you know me well, or that I wrote this to your satisfaction.

You hit the nail on the head, and I need say no more.

I wanted to so much, but I never had the guts to do do what you did so well by reading your poetry to us.

I am at last writing for myself, and have neglected my old chums. Please forgive me, and this has tweaked my thread.


Nellieanna profile image

Nellieanna 5 years ago from TEXAS

Please - stay tweeked!


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Nellie, Nellie, Nellie. 'The Potter' now has 27,993 words. I went on the Common today and edited the last three bits I had written, and still it goeth on. Keep your fingers crossed for me that I don;t come up against any more brick walls. The last writer's block (writers' block) took too long to be unblocked.

Talking of which, I wonder what happened to the 'Drano' competition. No one notified me.


Vinaya Ghimire profile image

Vinaya Ghimire 5 years ago from Nepal

My favorite lines:

And the roses smelled as of stale wine

And cigarettes in a dark room at dawning.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Vinaya Ghimire. they are also my favourite lines. Thank you. Thank you.


jami l. pereira 5 years ago

I have always Loved Billie Holliday , she was a remarkable blues singer :) I loved this Hub , very poignant , I voted up,awesome and beautiful , thanks for the read:)


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you, Jami. I appreciate your visit, and thanks for the votes, and comment.

Billie Holiday was amazing, wasn't she?


jami l. pereira 5 years ago

I used to have all of her albums , i bought them from columbia house , i never thought that i would find them , nice thing about them is all you have to do is call them up and ask , they had 6 of her albums and i bought them all :) then i got a divorce and he took them ... I dont think i miss anything he took except for those albums :( she was awesome! Loved your Hub ! have a great day!)


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Have you seen the movie, 'Lady Sings the Blues', the story of Billie? I have not seen it, but apparently it is a really sensitive portrayal of the woman.


Storytellersrus profile image

Storytellersrus 5 years ago from Stepping past clutter

TL, Lady Sings the Blues is a moving picture. I hadn't thought of it in years. I hadn't thought of melancholy over a woman either. In my case it would have been over a French man, a Grand Marnier and a Cowboy Singing the Blues.

Only I have never quite connected with the Blues being blue. Blue is a color of calm awakening, of energetic afternoons, of tempestuous seas, of antioxident berries. Not melancholy like smoke gray, a color of transition. To me it is the transition's uncertainty that inflicts melancholy; I will never love again; there will never be another romantic like this one particular unique in all the world man who has left me alone with my Grand Marnier and this Cowboy Singing the Blues.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Storytellersrus, i have just read your comment on Tom's 'The Cento' and I can assure you that poetry is what November is all about for you.

What a lovely lyrical comment. I am goings on to see your pages,

Thanks for the visit.


QudsiaP1 profile image

QudsiaP1 5 years ago

The sadness builds up here incredibly; very strong.


Twilight Lawns profile image

Twilight Lawns 5 years ago from Norbury-sur-Mer, Surrey, England. U.K. Author

Thank you Qudsia, I appreciate your visit. You are always most welcome. By the way, did you ever visit my hub on 'Cookie of Abbottabad'? It was inspired by your lovely hub about your two parrots.

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