Summer in the Orchard, a Free Verse Friday Poem
fragile blossom, white,
thin as an egg shell
little yoke of pollen
cradled between red palms
searing sunlight fades
face turning suffocating
under thick green aroma
flushed cheeks pressing
into cool sweet earth
abandoned full and heavy
brown wicker basket
little tangerines, Clementines,
two snuggled together make one palmful
each scrap of bronzed leather revealing
another sweet mouthful,
before the bitter backwash
of a September moon rises
against the stars overhead
About This Poem (A Plea for Feedback)
I've been revising this poem for over a year and I'm still not completely happy with it. Your honest, but polite, feedback would be much appreciated. Which parts work for you? Which parts don't work? Are there any particularly strong images or feelings envoked by this poem? Is there a part that sounds awkward or flat? I'd like to know, so don't be shy (but please be nice)!
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