First off I gotta say, "I Love You GUY'S, my Fellow "Hubbers". You make it Fun to Laugh at myself through the Comments you leave...And this was one LAUGHABLE week in Sunny Florida. So here's the Instant Replay.

On Monday we got our "Verizon" Cell Phone Bill, it was $350.00! Lover Man and I go, "What the _ _ _ _! That night we decide to call Verizon. The conversation went like this. "Hello, my name is "Charles" how may I help you"? (Me) putting "Charles" on speaker phone. "Hi, Charles, we just got our Verizon Bill and this can't possibly be all ours, maybe it's somebody else's combined...there's at least (2) 800 numbers that we know are not ours". Charles clears his throat, "they are all yours, they come from your cell phone" he replies dryly. "No there NOT Charles"..."Yes, THEY'll have to buy more minutes to cover your overage, that's the best I can do" he said, I swear he sounds like he's snickering.

"Listen CHARLES, we've been Good Verizon customers for at least 10 years" he cuts me off with "That's true, but you still have to pay the bill, and I'll allow you to buy Extra minutes, because you are also going to be over Next Months Billing as well"...I swear he is now SMILING Triumphantly through the phone. "WHAT I say, starting to loose can we be"? "I don't know, that's for you to figure, what will it be some ExtraMinutes, Mmm"? "No it won't be, I say, let me speak to your Manager". "I am the Manager, the night manager" he replies. "Fine, then we are going to go over every single number listed to determine who made these calls" I reply. "Fine he answers, have a nice night, and Thank you for using Verizon". Up yours Phone Company I think to myself as we hang up.

The next day we called back and spoke to a young Lady named, "Jodi". She listens quietly as I tell her about the phone bill. She replies, "You guys have been Loyal Verizon Customers, so let's see what I can do for you". I'm thinking "I Love you Jodi, oh yes I do..." We are both silent for a moment, and then Jodi says. "First I will take $50.00 off the current bill of $350.00 we really can't count who made those (2) 800 numbers phone calls"..."Oh Thank You Jodi, thank you" I reply sincerely. "Next, she says, how about paying an Extra $10.00 to buy more minutes so that you won't be over next billing cycle, because as of today, you are". I say, "yes, yes" and then I explain that while in Florida we only use our Cell phones, and with buying the Condo with the View and all...there may have been more calls than usual". She tells me that once you go over your minutes, it becomes 45 cents per minute! "Aha I reply, who knew". "I know, I know", she replies almost soothingly. "You won't have to sign a new contract, so if you find you want to keep the extra minutes, it will cost just another $10.00 a month".

I thank her, and think, I'd bake her a Cake...If I baked. So instead I just say humbly, "Thank you Jodi, and we promise to be more careful, calling nights after nine and weekends because they are Free, and to limit them during the day". She Laughs as she says, "Thank you for Choosing Verizon, and your Loyalty". I LOVE Her!

The next morning, are you ready for this...CHARLES calls, he is FURIOUS! "Jodi had No Business taking $50.00 off our current bill and HE PERSONALLY was putting in back on! "Oh NO you're NOT Charles" I say my voice rising. "OH YES I AM" he answers his voice rising above mine. "You do Charles and we are so outta here...No More Verizon for Us! And, I will be in touch with your Supervisor" I say. He screams, "I AM THE SUPERVISOR"! Well then ACT like One, I say calmly, if it weren't for Jodi, we would No longer be Verizon Customers...and now to add Insult to Energy... you are using up my precious Verizon Minutes". "All right, all right, I'm going to allow this $50.00 to stay off your bill, but in the future...and he goes on to Rant, and I say "ok, ok," and then Charles ends it with, "Thank You for choosing Verizon", and then we part with a Click of the phone. As I think for now, Verizon, for now.

The rest of the week went like this...The "Contractor" that was supposed to work on the "Condo with the View" is now suing the "Electrician" for he found out not only was he trying to RIP Us Off by saying that the Permit cost $500.00! When in reality it cost $75.00 at the most. But he wanted us to meet him at an address that used to house the Permit Dept. And we should make the check out to him. Well that wasn't going to happen...And when we told the Contractor, who told his wife, they looked into their books, and realized they too had been Ripped off for many years by the "Electrician". And so as the week came to an end, the Contractor contacted his Lawyer. And we are now interviewing a new Contractor and Electrician! I really couldn't make this stuff up!

Lover Man and I took a break today down at the pool, and as we looked across the "Inter Costal" to the other side, we saw a dog happily barking and wearing a Red Sweater...Hey, it's Florida Guys, it's Florida!

Comments 57 comments

FloraBreenRobison profile image

FloraBreenRobison 4 years ago

Oh, I've had conversation with company representatives that have annoyed me and...wait a minute, no I usually talk to an automated voice...Glad to her you won the 2nd round with Charles.

Maybe the legal action between the Contractor and electrician will mean that the next two get along better....It couldn't be any worse....right?

Becky Katz profile image

Becky Katz 4 years ago from Hereford, AZ

I worked for a contractor and it was my job to make sure that all charges from subs were legit. They will do ya every time. They and the contractors will all do ya so check very carefully before you pay them or sign any contracts. Make sure that the contract specifies 'to your satisfaction'. Also make sure that it states that they are entirely responsible for any costs for repairs covered under contract. They will build more carefully.

Faithful Daughter profile image

Faithful Daughter 4 years ago from Sunny Florida

Wow, I thought these were the kind of things that only happened to me! My son has Verizon and has nothing but problems with them. I stopped paying for overages when I went with MetroPCS. If you live in Florida, as I do, then look them up. $40 dollars and I get unlimited minutes with long distance, texting, and everything I need.

Hope everything works out for you with the new contractor and electrician.

Happyboomernurse profile image

Happyboomernurse 4 years ago from South Carolina

Oh my goodness, there's quite a cast of dubious characters in this "episode" but I loved the ending- yeah, it's Florida, it's early March and you're at the pool! Pretty cool.

Voted up, funny and interesting.

alocsin profile image

alocsin 4 years ago from Orange County, CA

I always try to wade through the automatic voice prompts as quickly as possible to talk to real people, but as you point out, a real person can be just as taxing. Voting this Up and Funny.

Pamela99 profile image

Pamela99 4 years ago from United States

What an awful series of events with Jodi being the most reasonable and probably honest person in the group. I have Verizon but never had a problem with them, knock on wood! Charles needs to get a life! Very funny on your part and definitely rated up!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Thanks Flora, it did feel Good to Win round 2 with Charles.

From your Lips to God's ears Flora...I'm supposed to hear from the "New" Contractor today by e-mail...Here's Hoping!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Thanks Becky for all your very useful advice... Which I will follow...Also I've heard to put a Date to be completed by. Hoping to hear from the "New Contractor" by e-mail today on whether they ARE taking the job. I've lost Confidence.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Faithful Daughter, Funny, a friend of mine who lives here just switched to "MetroPCS" too. Right now we're Not here full time, but still it might not be a bad idea...I am keeping this option in mind. Thanks for sharing this Info.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Gail, Let's hope my Cast of Characters stops growing for awhile, and that this New Contractor & Electrician are the Right ones...I Hope, I Hope...Now I'm patiently waiting for the e-mail that will Confirm the commitment. Yes it's GREAT to be swimming in March, the Weather has been Beautiful!

cleaner3 profile image

cleaner3 4 years ago from Pueblo, Colorado

Isn't life fun and great. Can't hardly wait for tommorow . you got some sunburn lotion on your nose, let me wipe it off.

drbj profile image

drbj 4 years ago from south Florida

Once you have settled in, b., and have decided to switch your telephonic allegiance, refer to this hub and send a letter to the Verizon CEO outlining Charles' behavior and language. May or may not make a difference, but you will feel better. Promise.

Also, so others will think you are a native Floridian and try not to overcharge you ... so much, it's 'Intracoastal Waterway.' BTW, enjoyed the update.

always exploring profile image

always exploring 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

HaHaHaHa, If ever i am feeling down, i know if i read your story i am going to LOL, and i did all the way through.. I could see you and Lover in the pool watching the Doggie in the red sweater HaHa..Voted up and away..Oh by the way, i don't wish you any more bad luck, but if it happens, please write about it..HaHa

sligobay profile image

sligobay 4 years ago from east of the equator

Thanks for humanizing the experiences we share in common.

Rip-off artists lurk around every corner and prey on the most vulnerable. I would take time to commend Jodi and deride Charles with a polite letter to the CEO of Verizon. Send him the link to this Hub. Gerry

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Actually Drbj, I did feel Satisfied when Charles and I hung up...He seemed like a very "Anal Person" with his own set of problems...If Not, time will catch up with him.

I'm beginning to Feel like a "Seasoned Floridian" after what we went through, I'm so much Wiser now...Sure I am! Thanks for all your Thoughtful Comments.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Cleaner3, thanks, I just wiped the excess Loition from my Nose. Life is so much better today, the New Contractor is actually going to do the job...Hooray! What a difference a day makes.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Alocsin, there is a Trick to getting through the "Automatic Voice Prompts" sometimes just by hitting O a few times. Verizon used to be ok to deal with, Charles must have been having a few bad days...Jodi was great, and as she told us, "Just doing her Job". Thanks so much for Enjoy and your Vote.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Pamela, I can't say that I ever had any REAL problems with Verizon before...I guess there's always a First time for Everything. Poor Charles, as I told Drbj, seemed so "Anal" he must not be a Happy Person. So glad you find my Hub Funny and thanks for the UP Vote.

Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi, Oh phone companies! Ew! I know just how you feel, mind you, its the bank with me, the charged me 30 pounds, for going over my overdraft, then another 30 pounds for going over the overdraft bill!! can you believe it? bang went my savings! or at least part of them, and your electrician? oh my goodness! at least you can sit by the pool and chill out! haha! thank goodness!

profile image

Sunnie Day 4 years ago

Oh B...I loved this so much..I just love your funny style of writing and I know this is your lovely personality shining through..We are with verizon for many years...but have had a couple close calls too but over all we have had Jodi's...:)

Thank you for the smiles..


Rosemay50 profile image

Rosemay50 4 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

Hay just think B and look on the bright side you won't have any of these problems next year, you will just be able to move back in and RELAX.

I think I would be changing phone companies. Charles sounds like he needs pulling down a peg or 2.

Laughter must be the greatest asset, it gets us through so much. Keep laughing

Movie Master profile image

Movie Master 4 years ago from United Kingdom

I must bookmark this, If ever I have a bad day, I will read it again to remind myself things could be worse!

Your're still seeing the funny side and at this stage of things that is most commendable! I think I am more stressed about your permit than you are!

Best wishes and hugs, Lesley

mckbirdbks profile image

mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

Hello b. your sense of humor always comes shining through. I would have a stroke seeing a $350.00 phone bill. And therefore would not have to pay. I know it's extreme. But to sit in a pool and be entertained by a barking dog in a red sweater, it just makes it all worth it. Now, I'll go and vote.

Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States

Hi b. Malin! You sure did have some kind of week. Thank goodness for the "Jodi's" of the world. Let's think positively for the the next week!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

That Dog was so alive and Happy "Always Exploring". Speaking of Dogs, go see "The Artist" that Dog really steals the picture, and should have gotten an Oscar for "BEST Supporting Actor Dog"!

You are too Funny Girlfriend, here's hoping this week of mine as a little less Laughs, if not, I'll Hub about it anyway!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

You know Sligobay, we thought about calling Verizon back, but after Jodi, and remembering what she had said that she was only doing her job, but doing it the RIGHT way...We though "Charles" had problems, deep problems, and maybe he thought about how He handled this situation, and (I'd like to think) had his regrets. So, I'm letting it go.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Nell, yes, we did need a Day just to Chill out and I'm so glad we got one...As you've pointed out, if it's not our Banks then it's our Phone Companies, and Contractors, etc. Thanks for your Comments and thoughts.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Oh Rosemay, from your Mouth to God's Ears...I hope so!

Most of my family uses Verizon so we'll see... "Metro" PCS, is starting to look Tempting.

Laughter is so Needed today, and thank goodness it's still FREE!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

When I think of what's going on with others...I think I shouldn't complain, but Heck, it's Human Nature and Funny Nature at that. Please don't Stress for me Movie Master, hey we could set that one to Music...And if you haven't seen the Movie, "The Actor" Go! We saw it the other night and it relieved my Stress...The Dog is a Hoot! LOL to YOU Lesley.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

I'll tell you Mckbirdbks, WE did almost have a Stroke when we looked at that Telephone Bill. We've always stayed within our Cell Phone Minutes. But I think between buying the Condo, the Bank, the Realtors Etc. we went over, and then it's 45 cents a MINUTE! So...

Yes, that barking Dog in the Red Sweater made our day...Thanks for your Vote, that made my Day too!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Dexter I am being So Positive for the upcoming week...A New Contractor, A New Electrician...Hey, what more could I ask for...And a visit from You makes it Complete!

neeleshkulkarni profile image

neeleshkulkarni 4 years ago from new delhi

ahah for those days when there was a human interface in every transaction you made.It was slow and inefficient but it was at least done through a human being and hence there was scope for discussion and reason.Now the call center Jodi's and Charles's make sure that all you get is ,a thank you Sir,Yes Sir .no Sir and have a good day Sir after you have told them your wife was in hospital and your brother just died.

even in the one to one transactions the same pattern is repeated with the voices just having faces and bodies.No one in the entire system has customers interest in mind.A Sr VP of a multi national bank , who is a close friend once told me that getting a new customer cost less than solving a chronic problem for an old one and hence they preferred to just let any customer who has a problem go away rather than spend any but the minimum amount of energy in solving his problem and if he/she quit and did not pay what they were demanding they there were the courts and if that proved to be long winded the customer was harassed more since the company had its own legal cell just to handle such stuff.Besides he told me," I am only concerned about my short term results who knows where I will be next year"

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Jodi was the exception to the Rule Neeleshkulkarni, otherwise I totally agree with your first Paragraph...No body LISTENS! And the best Expression is NO PROBLEM...when I hear that one...I think Oh, there's going to be a problem...It's so Loosely said.

But, when WE talk LOUDLY and above them, we do get SATISFACTION...I become that person, like a Female Clint Eastwood, you don't want to MESS with ME. Nice guys and gals, I've come to Sadly realize, Do NOT get Satisfaction. Loved your Comments, as will others who read them... and Nod, in totally Agreement.

billybuc profile image

billybuc 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

I'm trying not to laugh..I really am...but you are so damn funny! My son worked for Verizon and he quit; said they were all a bunch of assholes; they kept telling him he was...wait for it...too helpful. Enough said! Great hub!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hey Guy, you are Funny too, that could also be a Laugh a minute Hub Billybuc. I Loved what Verizon said to your Son...that Sums up the World of Today so Beautifully! Thanks for sharing those Comments.

Cheryl Kapelner-Champ 4 years ago

Right on b. Malin, u* tell that phone co. corporation exactly what's what, great job!

Sounds like though there are challenges u* & Stephan are enjoying the journey! The very best to u* both in the sunshine state. LOL, from our neck of the woods as springtime slowly approaches.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Thanks Cheryl, for all your warm Wishes, always appreciated. We have some Beautiful, Breezy Weather here, Great for walking...which we did yesterday. I wish you an Early Spring. LOL.

Karanda profile image

Karanda 4 years ago from Australia

Oh boy, supervisors like Charles should be demoted. Where do you go if you get no satisfaction from the top dog? Dealing with phone companies would have to be the most frustrating past time of our era. Glad you were able to get the deal to hold in the end. Can't wait to read what happens next!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Karanda, I know, I know...but in the End "Charles" did come around...and I'm exhausted just from trying to get things done here before we go North again...So I didn't want to put more Time or Energy in to Reporting him. I guess he was having a Bad Day.

breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 4 years ago

Come home, it's 77 degrees in New Jersey!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Wow...I'm impressed! But tomorrow is FINALLY Contractor Day, We have finally gotten the PERMIT and the Electrical Work is about to begin...Thanks for the Jersey Update in Weather Breakfastpops.

acaetnna profile image

acaetnna 4 years ago from Guildford

Ha ha this was completely awesome. It so brightened my day!!!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Acaetnna, Thank You...Sometimes we Win and Sometimes NOT...Yea, for our Side!

landscapeartist profile image

landscapeartist 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

I absolutely loved your hub. It grabbed my attention and wouldn't let go til the end. Glad to know there are still people like Jodi around. And, so glad that you won the 2ndround with Charles.

So glad to hear you are outside at the pool relaxing at this time of year. I am up in Ontario looking out my window at snow.

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mikeydcarroll67 4 years ago

Maybe it's time just to get a prepaid phone and just spend the money for what we need rather than deal with people like that.

plaid pages profile image

plaid pages 4 years ago from Wisconsin

Hilarious. I think I've dealt with a few guys like Charles before...

Good luck and text only. haha


joejagodensky profile image

joejagodensky 4 years ago from Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Excellent presentation of a sordid affair. Lily Tomlin rang through my mind as I read your Hub, from her early comedic days. Who said God is dead? He's the Phone Company! Thanks.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hey Lanscapeartist, there is Always room for one more around the Pool! I'm so Glad you Enjoyed a little Satisfaction with Me... against Verizon...La, La, I'm now putting on a Heavy Coat, and coming by to read your Hubs!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

You know Mikeydcarroll, I'm actually thinking that way myself...A lot of friends and family have done that...So Verizon, if you're Listening...

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Plaid pages, I must confess...I don't Text...But "Charles" is such a different breed of Person...I'm sure he thinks he's PERFECT...Life is Long Charles, Life is Long! So glad I made you Laugh!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Ah Lily Tomlin, "One Ring-a-dingy..." Like your Comic thoughts too, Joe. So Glad you Enjoyed!

socialcard profile image

socialcard 4 years ago

Seemed like an eventful week huh? Glad everything is well :)

htodd profile image

htodd 4 years ago from United States

Thanks ,That is really great post

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Soclalcard, It was...It was. Dull weeks are Good too! So glad you stopped by.

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

Hi Htodd, Thanks, so glad you enjoyed...for that's really what it's all about for us Hubbers.

Sharyn's Slant profile image

Sharyn's Slant 4 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

OMG B, I can't believe that the damn supervisor actually called you back and said what he did. Now that is horrible customer service. I love these peeks into your life, certainly gives me a chuckle. Thanks!!!

b. Malin profile image

b. Malin 4 years ago Author

All Ended well Sharyn, we did Finally get the Credit on our Next Statement. Hope you're feeling "Chipper" once again...and it sounds like you are girlfriend! I'll be by.

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