Ten Things I've Learned From Facebook

I was booking it through an airport headed east to start a summer in Europe with more luggage than a person should ever have, and a man, in his generosity, offered me a luggage cart for which he had paid. In an act of blinding idiocy, I declined. I declined because I had too much stuff to carry as it was...how the heck would I push a luggage cart too? I blame a series of night shifts for that kind of swift thinking, but I have to admit, stupid creeps up on me sometimes. Which brings me to Facebook. For years, I had fought getting on Facebook, citing being too busy for it, and having trouble keeping up with everyone as it was. As it turns out, a good amount of my friends are on Facebook, and it's actually a TOOL to keep up with them. Imagine that. Everyone has their own reasons for social networking, or for avoiding it, I see great arguments for both sides. I'll say in my own case, I have lived the past 10 years of my life very, very differently than most--I'd call it vagabondish, but since I'm female, people are more comfortable with the term "gypsy." Honestly, I was nervous facing the people of my past with how I lived, because it was just so far off the beaten path. It makes for okay writing, but it does ring the 'she's crazy' bell for some. And the bell tolls for me.

1. There is clearly a mind-control alien who runs Facebook.

Who is this guy? He can take over the world! I'm one of the people who was completely against social networking, and one month into it, my friends thought I needed a "Facebook Intervention." They told me I didn't read the small print, and that it's completely addictive. I needed Facebook rehab. Facebook was only feeding the rest of my crazy--writing, imagining, and thinking almost completely in song. I have already allowed songs to make grown-up decisions for me, and having a friend update their status with the song 'Summertime' is enough to make me re-consider going to work for the day. Facebook Man got me. He got me good.

2. People are so freakishly awake.

When I joined Facebook last year, I was working night shift, and would log on when I had down time. I could not believe how many people I knew were awake, (and on Facebook), at all hours. People paid me to stay awake and I just barely did it, how, and more importantly why, are people staying awake at night? My friend the psychiatric nurse told me that the census is down for every unit in her hospital except the Psychiatric Ward. It's almost good news--the rest of the hospital is seeing fewer and fewer physically sick people, but the mental-health ward is over capacity. She cited job losses, depression,and just general hard times as the reason, and we live in the Silicon Valley! Facebook-induced insomnia can't be helping the situation. Facebook is immortal. Go to sleep, it will be there in the morning.

3. No photo should ever be posted without signed waivers from all photographed parties.

Seriously. Enough said.

4. People change.

And not just the weight gain, and the receding hairlines. I've seen some thugs I knew in the past with scriptures as their status updates. I've seen some of the drama from the past cool to civility with some of my friends, and it's encouraging. Most of my old-friends have progressed or improved in ways I always hoped they would. Their past is part of my past, and knowing they're doing okay puts everything into perspective. We grew up, and I love it. I recently saw, "Grown-Ups," and once again, reflected on the ways that we changed, where we moved, how we stayed the same. My old friends tell me I have not changed, and I'm not sure how to take that. I've matured! I've grown as a person! What do you mean I haven't changed?! But I've decided to be happy about the fact that they feel I haven't changed. I did re-connect with some that changed in a way that means the person I knew is gone--or never existed, and it's hard to figure out which of those scenarios is worse.

5. My memory is way better than I thought, or want it to be.

One of my favorite Facebook pages was "I'm not creepy, I just have really good memory." My memory is not a choice, it's a genetic curse. My grandmother has this memory, and I inherited it. I can recall the best and worst of the past in vivid detail. The more emotional connection I have with the memory, the more details I recall. It has something to do with the limbic system, blah, blah, blah, but if it could be removed surgically, I'd do my own IV and surgical prep. Even when I haven't thought of something or someone in many years, it is more likely that I've just displaced, rather than forgotten.. Facebook dislodged old memories, and some have been really, really great. It wasn't boring, guys, have to admit that much.

6. Abbreviation is now an accepted dialect.

Well, you can't major in abbreviation in college, but it wouldn't be the worst idea to just embrace the idea of abbreviations, and make it one of the 101's. I write. I've always written, and can be a purist about books, and words. Abbreviations use to completely annoy me, but in the interest of not wasting time, I came to the dark side. I still have to "urban dictionary" an abbreviation or two, even now, with all the texting I do. I'll still argue that hardly anyone can spell without the assistance of technology, and it's our own fault. Looks as though abbreviations are here to stay, though. Even my mother texts, and abbreviates. The end is certainly near.

7. We are all voyeurs.

Facebook brings this out in all of us. For those who imagine they are above this, it's more likely they just haven't found an interesting enough Facebook wall. My brother is a very disinterested Facebooker. He is nearly never on it, and has forgotten that he even has an account once or twice. It only took a basketball injury, and a subsequent knee surgery that left him housebound for him to discover his inner stalker. He doesn't have the ability to hide much, so he openly admitted to spending hours reading "news feeds" and looking at pictures. He sent me a Facebook message during the time, "I believe surgery, pain-killers, and Facebook break-up families."



8. There's a chance I might not ever grow up.

Thirty year old me knows she has to be responsible, to pay bills, and to do her grown-up job that involves saving people's lives. Unfortunately, 17-year-old me, though I thought I murdered her, needs to make sure that an old love interest's girlfriend isn't cuter than me, or doing better than me. I truly, truly hate to admit that, and most who know me would be certain that I am just too sophisticated and evolved to concern my lofty self with such inconsequential nonsense. Not the case. I needed to know.

9. The past happened.

Whether it's our mistakes we're running from, or our future we're running towards, we can get so far away from our past that it almost seems like science fiction. But it all really did happen, and denial is a waste of time. We have to own it. Yes, I really did wear that, buy that, or date that. Time to face the truth. It can't be unwritten, and it wears running shoes. It will catch up to you.

10. We are just not that different.

We aren't. I mean, the details are different, but how many on your friend list aren't muddling through their lives with essentially the same goals--a decent present, a better future, love, happiness, and peace? When I see people arguing vehemently over politics, and religion, I hear an underlying awareness that things are just not right in the world, and more than one of us wants things fixed; more than one of us wants to do something about what we see; more than one of us knows that it will take dramatic change to do everyone justice, small changes won't work. When I see that one of the 'bad-boys' I knew in the past has become a father, or a husband, or simply an asset to society, and now they've 'gotten Jesus,' I don't think that's about fear. I think that's about love. My friends who've become parents and are newly religious, have probably discovered a love they didn't know they had,--a love they didn't have for themselves, even--and they would like the world not to suck for their offspring. If religion gives them hope, than off to church they go. Though religion and politics will always fuel the biggest fires when it comes to arguments, and even wars, it goes back to the core values of wanting things to be better, and disagreeing on how to get them so.



Comments 79 comments

whiteorchids profile image

whiteorchids 6 years ago from Tropical Paradise

Facebook is an interesting site, I have one for family and one for friends. I don't kno if it is an addiction but I do know it is much easier sometimes then a long distance phone bill. Thumbs Up! :)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thanks for reading, whiteorchids! I joined about 10 months ago, and took to it like a fish to water, but the novelty did wear off. My reality is much better, I think fb puts me more in that reading/writing space that is not real. Fun in a way, but not real.


ltfawkes profile image

ltfawkes 6 years ago from NE Ohio

I like your writing style. You're honest, insightful, and uplifting. I like your humor, too. Like:

"needs to make sure that an old love interest's girlfriend isn't cuter than me"

There isn't a person alive who hasn't thought that!

L.T.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thanks, LT. I saw you write in your profile when you first joined that you were holding off on changing the picture because you really liked the hat on the default pic. Classic! The girlfriend thing--guilty. I had to check. Thanks for the writing compliment, I'm finding that now that I'm not writing about life on an Indian Reservation and other things I don't know didley about, I'm much more content writing. I just write how I talk, and how I live. Way easier.


Triplet Mom profile image

Triplet Mom 6 years ago from West Coast

Great hub!!! So true so true. I also love the hard core thugs I used to know who are now doing things like teaching, counseling, giving back to the community and other noble acts that they would have never admitted to in their past lives. Facebook is a trip and you wrapped it up in a nice little package.


always exploring profile image

always exploring 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

May i say, " You are a gifted writer" and the things you write about are so in tune with life. You write about past friends and wonder how they look and are the women

prettier than you, how typical! We all do that. I,m still waiting for a hair-raising story about birthing 'them there' babies.

Love and Peace


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Triplet mom...I love the community rehab too. Seen it, and appreciate the guys doing it. Dude, fb really is a trip, funny what you realize about yourself. Always exploring....I so appreciate what you said. I have a hub "the capable nurse" that's a birth story. I am currently mid-labors right now--thank goodness for coffee breaks!


 6 years ago

Another finely written hub. As innocuous as this may sound, FB and other sites like it can wrestle control from you if you are not careful. I broke the addiction by telling myself I cannot do everything everywhere all at once, which exactly is similar to what FB drives you towards. People really do change- how profoundly FB makes us realise that! And how precisely you captured it. Needless to repeat that you are an amazing hubber. Flattery apart...


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thank you! FB--what's the harm?? It should be an after-school special for adults. And yes, people do change, but I love Eddie Veddor's line, "I've changed by not changing at all." (Elderly woman behind the counter in a small town).


Pratonix profile image

Pratonix 6 years ago from Asia

This is a very interesting hub. I too should write about my adventures in FB. Sometime...


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thank you, and please do! Everyone's experience with fb is different.


elizakay profile image

elizakay 6 years ago from Virginia

Good, thoughtful article! I was the same way until my friends convinced me I needed one to, I don't regret it! Plenty of people will say "It's too much drama" But, those that cause drama, or I see using FaceBook for reasons like hurting someone else, or spreading another's private life around that is not their information to share, get removed from my wall--so, I keep the interactions pleasant!

My main point was that during a survey the other day about Face Book it asked

"How would you feel without Facebook?"

My options were

a.) dead (seriously, it said that)

b.) Withdrawn

c.) Depressed

d.) I'd be okay with it.

e.) I can't live without it!

This was a serious survey by people really doing research--not some 'noob' quiz. Just, wow! How many clicked 'dead' I wonder?


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Hi Eliza! My best friend's name is Eliza...and I'm with ya. Who are the people who clicked dead?? These options are too dramatic...good grief. There's not much I couldn't give up if I had to, and Facebook certainly falls in that category. It can be crazy drama for people though, I've heard some surprising stories. FB is like most things, who you are shines through quickly. If your page is high school drama, you are high school drama. If your page is gloomy, and negative, you are likely gloomy and negative. If you used FB to stay in touch with your friends, or deepen your connection with them, it will likely happen. If you've used it as a tool to improve in some way--and you certainly can--that's likely what you're naturally prone to do. Thanks for reading this!


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 6 years ago from England

Hi, I have tried fb because I thought it would be good to post our hub links, then i discovered that there was nobody on there that I knew! lol so I decided to go in under my hub name, send out loads of friend requests to people with my surname all around the world, and guess what? it worked. but I now have nothing else to say to them as I dont know them! ha ha my son is always on it, and I couldn't believe how many friends on there he has connected to. The only trouble is with it is the fact that I don't really want people knowing about my life who live near me! on hubpages everybody is around the world so it doesn't matter, I can sit in my little house in England and feel that I can write what I want without having to face the people just around the corner, but then again maybe they read my hubpage! great article, cheers nell


bayoulady profile image

bayoulady 6 years ago from Northern Louisiana,USA

yeah, I can SO identify. I got off about 6 months ago. I could not stay off of it!


twentyfive profile image

twentyfive 6 years ago

Great hub. Facebook has good things and bad things indeed. It's just up to us if we let it control us ;)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Nell, sounds like you found a way to make it work for you, and I completely hear what you're saying about telling about how telling the world can be easier than telling your neighbor. Funny how that works. Bayoulady, no relapses?? That's amazing! It does get addictive. Thanks for reading. Twentyfive, thanks for the read, and so very true. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting off it anytime soon, and I found some pages on there that I do really like.


Ms.TyTy profile image

Ms.TyTy 6 years ago

I loved this! It was so honest and I can totally relate. I was against joining FB for years and now it seems to be apart of my everyday routine. You know I heard on the radio that there were studies where like 85% of females will check thier FB pages before going to the bathroom first thing in the mornings... its is sad, but I on some mornings am apart of the 85%... great writing!


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thanks, girlie! You know I tend to tell the truth...even if it's embarrassing. I've also been part of that shameless 85% more then once. Now, not so much, but it was ridiculous at first. I got intrigued enough by the addiction that I decided to work on making a social network. Ton of work--but I've got a good developing team.


dl53acy profile image

dl53acy 6 years ago from East Texas

OMG! Me and one of my girlfriends were talking about facebook addictions just last night. She asked why she hasn't seen much of me on it lately and I had to finally admit to her that I'm facebook fried because like many I use to check it first thing in the mornings. So I've been winging myself from it lately and sadly as I hate to admit, I get more done during the day! Great Hub ahostagesituation and you've become one of my fans! Feel free to stop by to read some of my hubs if you like mystery and suspense short stories!


bayoulady profile image

bayoulady 6 years ago from Northern Louisiana,USA

.....................and now, I am addicted to hubpages. I just traded one addiction(facebook, ) for another!LOL!


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Dlteacy-thank you for reading this...first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, been there. But I have seen the calamity now, and backed off a lot. I was way too interested. But still it has been great catching up with people I'd never see otherwise. Bayou lady...I know right? As soon as I get some down time I have another "ten things" I really want to do. Addict.


Margaret D 6 years ago

Hey girl......Loved it like always


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Hey, Dub...thank you, love you, miss you. Getting ready (again)--long day.


katie54321 profile image

katie54321 6 years ago from Pennsylvania

Great hub.

I thought about writing something like this once (not in HP) but what I learned from Facebook were things different from the ones you did. I learned my children are not perfect nor gifted; my marriage must be bad because I don't post as my status that my husband is the most wonderful man in the world. Even though you know that this isn't true sometimes it creeps into your psyche. I ended up blocking the domain at my house because it just sucked all my time. I unblock it once a week to catch up for 20 minutes and that is plenty of time.


hubpageswriter 6 years ago

I think the Facebook phase will be a long time to come before another site takes over in terms of its popularity with people. Or perhaps there will be none to take over. Good hub.:)


Winson 6 years ago

I've already give up my facebook account. Can't believe it so addictive, now all my friends surrounding are talking about it, housewives and pensioners are relaying on it. But I totally against it.


L&DLisa 6 years ago

Hey there again girl~Read another one! Love your writing. It is one of my favorite things to read what my friends write, lucky me that you have a hub page - watch out, I'll be reading!! Facebook for me has been one of those things that I truly just try to skim for fear that it will suck the life right out of me. I love to be involved in everyone's everything including those I haven't talked to in forever so I fear that if I'm not careful I will fall into a pit of neverending checking and looking and reading... For now I will continue to be the one that says hello every once in a while to a friend and yes the one who occasionally does that voyeur thing into other's accounts. Thanks for writing.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Katie, it's true. We do watch others to evaluate our own lives, and some of that is actually good. Some of it is unhealthy. I do hope you consider writing about FB, it would be great to read another perspective, another 10 FB lessons from someone else. Thanks for reading, and I will read your work! Hubpages writer, I think FB is the social networking Mecca. Competing with it would be silly! I started researching its background a couple months after being on it. Learned a lot. Winson--sounds like you did the right thing for you. I think a lot of people get on it with the 'if you can't beat em join em' mentality. I've actually had a lot of good come from being on there, but I tend to see both sides of the coin typically. Thank you reading. Lis, just the response to this hub shows how plugged in we all are. And the voyeurism thing is also obvious...that's why reality tv was, and IS such a hit with people. We're all very interested in each other for some reason. Maybe it's a good thing.


multimastery 6 years ago

Great hub & funny! I don't use Facebook that much but I might start being more active. I really just use it as an automated update profile for business. Thanks for sharing..


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thanks for reading mulitmastery...I just browsed some of your hub titles, and you are one very driven individual. Interesting. Thanks for reading, thanks for the mail!


Allan Douglas profile image

Allan Douglas 6 years ago from Great Smoky Mountains, Tennessee

I'm a player, but not an addict. Facebook Man failed to snatch MY soul. Perhaps because I place a LARGE crucifix next to my computer before I log onto Facebook!

Very entertaining! Thanks.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Allan, that's hilarious! Thanks for reading.


elayne001 profile image

elayne001 6 years ago from Rocky Mountains

You are a gifted writer. It just seems to flow. Sometimes people need to keep secrets off facebook. I wrote a hub about it if you are interested.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Elayne...I could not agree more, fb is not a diary, lover, or best friend and should not have to perform as one. A little privacy never hurt anyone. I'm definitely interested in ur hub and should be able to get to it today.


Lady_E profile image

Lady_E 6 years ago from London, UK

Thanks for sharing this. I' more of a Twitterer but it's nice to know whats happening on Facebook. :)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Lady E, cool, I haven't even looked at what Twitter is yet. But we all want seem to want to be accessible and to access others, no matter what the method.


nikitha p profile image

nikitha p 6 years ago from India

nice hub I like it.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thanks, nikitha!


Liberian1847 profile image

Liberian1847 6 years ago from Philadelphia PA.

This is a pretty cool hub…nice writing and thanks for sharing your experience.

My greatest frustration with Facebook has always been the fact that my postings on other people pics and status updates would appear on all of my contacts walls or news feeds. I tried to modify my privacy settings in every way possible to curtail this problem but all failed. Imagine I'll go to your picture and comment "gorgeous" or "pretty lips" and the next day someone gonna ask me on Facebook “who’s that girl on the pic that you are commenting on?" All this happens because Facebook feeds almost all your every movement to everyone else on your friends list. Why do they do this: Only one possible answer: Facebook, as you rightly put it is being run by a "mind controlling alien" who wants people to be constantly and addictively engaged with the website with all the drama, and gossips...lol. However, I love social networking because it comes in handy when you have a serious project that you need help with.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

I see lots of benefits to social networking now...I also see how it creates the problem of knowing more about each other than perhaps we should. Either way, whether I use it or not, I doubt I'll cancel my acct anytime soon. Thanks for reading!


freelancewriterva profile image

freelancewriterva 6 years ago

this is a great hub. I know more than I needed to know about facebook.

Thanks


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Thanks! I'm giving the South Park credit to a buddy of mine who convinced me to see "Tran" recently. His idea. Can't recommend old school Tran, but the South Park parody is really funny! I was plotting his death most of the movie, but out came the South Park talk. "Poke your grandma!" is hilarious. Thanks for reading.


Moktaruzzaman profile image

Moktaruzzaman 6 years ago

Thanks for a nicely written hub about face book. I do appreciate you. Think how many hours, energy and intellect are being destroyed everyday. How many people get sick due to it’s addiction. 99% harmful and may be 1% fruitful for someone.(?)

So, I like to say, Face book is Fake book.

It should be stopped. Would you please agree with me?

Moktaruzzaman

moktaruzzaman@yahoo.com


epigramman profile image

epigramman 6 years ago

..okay okay okay - and now for another top ten from the epi-man as he drinks a glass of red wine and listens to Los Lobos play traditional Mexican music by his lake of Erie in Canada during another Canadian winter

TOP TEN THINGS I LIKE ABOUT YOU

1. Funny, funny and funny

2. so true and so true

3. bold

4. daring

5. audacious

6. smart as a whip

7. very confident so in return that makes your readers confident

8. you make me think

9. and learn

10. and question authority and the meaning of life


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 6 years ago Author

Well when you put it like that...lol! Thanks, and I like the Mexican music by lake Erie image.


Time4Travel profile image

Time4Travel 5 years ago from Canada

An amusing read! Thanks for a great hub.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Thanks! It was an amusing write. Facebook is a trip.


KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

KoffeeKlatch Gals 5 years ago from Sunny Florida

You have an interesting way of writing. I will be continuing to read your article. I enjoyed reading this one. Voted up and awesome.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Thank you, KKG.


liswilliams profile image

liswilliams 5 years ago from South Africa

Facebook bug, sooner or later you will be there!


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

I didn't have the slightest interest in it for the longest time, but once I got on it I was dumb on it, my brother called me a facebook whore, which I found hilarious! :-). It bores me now, so I check it almost everyday for about 2-5 minutes on my phone and move on with my actual life.


theseus profile image

theseus 5 years ago from philippines

Once again an interesting hub.

I so agree with you, the enthusiasm and curiousity over the fb do wear off, for me, at least. I'm still young but I seldom check my account. I only do if I want to check on my long-time-not seen-friends. I have more time to spend for hubpage..lol.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Hi theseus, and thanks! Haha...is Hubpages a Facebook substitute?? At least on this site we write, so we might accidentally have a provocative thought or be creative instead of telling all our friends what skirt we're wearing. I founded a social network and can't be a hypocrite though. I definitely think fb has its uses, I just worry that social media is engineering a new people that are depressing substitutes for who we can all be as humans. Take "Farmville," for instance. Someone in FB's Marketing division has to be patting themselves on the back that they got anyone over 16 to have an imaginary farm and waste their time improving it. "Don't milk a cow, that might take exercise, pretend to a milk cow on facebook instead!!" Of all the ways to spend your precious time on this beautiful and amazing planet, with all these beautiful and amazing people...how is that happening?

I still say go out and do something outrageous! Like be nice to someone. Or think for yourself.

Thanks for reading! --SJ


carrie450 profile image

carrie450 5 years ago from Winnipeg, Canada

What a wonderful hub about facebook. You are right, there are many people on facebook at all hours of the night, including my grandchildren and they have school the next day :)

I believe that facebook will be around for a long, long time.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Carrie, thanks for reading, and yep, people can't seem to get enough of FB or themselves on FB. Facebook is second only to Google for traffic, and Google's got nothing on the way Facebook can keep its visitors on for hours. But I understand Facebook's appeal, and success, and I'm glad I joined. It made me recognize that before everything that led me here I was a strange, artistic dreamer, and I still am. I spent time researching all of social media this year, it was really, really interesting. And Facebook isn't going anywhere. The internet itself would die first.


carrie450 profile image

carrie450 5 years ago from Winnipeg, Canada

I agree with you ahostagesituation. The internet would die first :)


hubpageswriter 5 years ago

I rated useful, funny and awesome for this hub. I don't know how you do it, but you've done it. The topic on Facebook is probably over-rated, but you've done it well. Got me enticed and open it, read it and comment. I laughed about the part on how your brother got hooked to Facebook. What you've mentioned are true, even if many people do not want to confess how addicted they are, the hours per day they are on it, says a lot. I hope to keep on reading your hubs. Take care for now.=)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Wow, thanks. I was completely addicted when I first got on. A friend told me, "you say FB isn't you, but that's just it, FB is everyone!" And so true. I'm not cancelling my account anytime soon, and it has brought people in my life that I probably would have never heard from again otherwise, which I'm definitely grateful for. It's also such an easy way to connect with your friends out of the country. And since I'm working from home today, I'm sort off and on it right now, so what can I say really?? And thanks again for the comment.


KoffeeKlatch Gals profile image

KoffeeKlatch Gals 5 years ago from Sunny Florida

Boy do some people change, appearance wise. I caught up with someone I haven't seen since high school on facebook and they look nothing like I remember. The personality is the same but the physical appearance is beyond different. Great srticle and great points. Voted up and awesome.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Hi, KKG! Thanks for reading, and so very true. I saw your response to my comment on your hub, and yeah that line was awesome...the relationship, not so much. I just couldn't pretend to feel something that I didn't. I'm always hoping to leave a relationship and still be cool, but that usually doesn't happen in my case. But, understand, I have no hang-ups about the fact that he hates me. It's kind of interesting. If a person can do a complete 180 once they're not getting their way, after claiming their utter devotion and love, than you have to question their mental health or the "love" itself. Whether or not I get my way, in or out of a relationship, I'm probably not going to be deliberately rude toward someone I care about. That's a little bit ridiculous. In our case, I made an effort more than once to get to a friendly place, it didn't work, and I haven't lost any sleep over it.


DjBryle profile image

DjBryle 5 years ago from Somewhere in the LINES of your MIND, and HOPEFULLY at the RIPPLES of your HEART. =)

Hey, Facebook may be addictive, but I guess I am becoming more addicted with your hubs! You make your readers laugh, gain more knowledge and provoke us to think more... I'll be back to read more from you, my friend! Voted up for a useful and awesome hub! =)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Wow!! Thanks, for that one, DjBryle. And since I was literally cleaning the house to avoid writing like I'm supposed to, you, my dear, are my motivation today. I'm in a fantastic mood--I just don't want to sit still and write stuff. But your comment is certainly a good way to try and start this, thanks again.


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

......I have 'quality' friends on Facebook - not 'quantity' ....... if you would like to hook up there ... please let me know! My name is Colin Stewart.

And you are one terrific writer/thinker!!!!!


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Thanks, Colin, and I have some combination of both quality and quantity friends on FB (and in my life ;->). I'll look you up later today. To be honest the novely wore off for me a while ago, and I'm on this site far more. It's way more interesting to me. I really appreciate your comment!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

...yes I agree with you too ..... I am at the Hub a lot too!


KatyWhoWaited profile image

KatyWhoWaited 5 years ago

love it, love it, love IT! Let me add: 11. Don't get into a facebook fight with a friend over collective bargaining ;)


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Hi Katy! The whole union thing is a relatively new concept to me as I'm from a state that thinks "Union" is a type of bank. I hope if this is about you that you and your friend worked things out, crazy what social media has brought to life, huh? And I have a story of a friend who lost her hairdresser over FB....NO JOKE!! He was all booked up, and she had some sort of emergent need for coloring and cutting so she went *gasp* behind his back and went to her cousin. He saw her FB pictures with her new hair and sent her essentially a "I see how you really are now..." message and WILL NOT speak to her for her traitorous act. FB is infringing on intelligence, and I'm scared. I've found some decent uses for it though; I'm sure you have too!


KatyWhoWaited profile image

KatyWhoWaited 5 years ago

I love the "emergent need for coloring" You're right, it was about my friend and me and it will take us a while to find a way to breach the gap it created. We will. I LOVE your humor! Looking forward to your next hub.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Oh, sorry to hear that, Katy. But you sound pretty affirmative that the gap will be breached. Communication of all types takes has potholes--a little time, a little wine...

And thanks, Katy, I love my humor too. It's part of the reason I'm not writing these hubs from a mental institution. It has definitely helped keep my thready little sanity. For now. I've got hubs written that I haven't published, and at some point I'm going to figure out why I haven't published them. Who knows? Great to hear from you!


parrster profile image

parrster 5 years ago from Oz

I'm slowly getting through your hubs; and what a treasure they are! I simply love your writers turn of phrase and the gently rambling logic of your thoughts. i can't help but think you would be a wise mentor to those that know you personally.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

I can't tell you how hard I laughed at "the gently rambling logic of your thoughts." That's hilarious! Sounds about right. "Wise mentor" --seems like big shoes to fill, and an amazing compliment--thank you. I'll say this, most do expect a certain level of reasonableness, or wisdom from me. The reality is, most of what I say in the wisdom department is biblical in one fashion or another. In real life, I only ramble when I'm tired. To get as many things done as I work on, most of what I say has to be pretty concise. But writing lets my inner rambler off her leash. Thanks for reading!


RTalloni profile image

RTalloni 5 years ago from the short journey

Insightful hub, for sure, and generating interesting comments.

As far as I can tell, Facebook hasn't enhanced most lives. I think that's the bottom line for me--would it truly enhance my life? I don't mean "would it give me more information" (no matter how questionable or marginal that info might be), but am thinking about the real definition of "enhance."


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 5 years ago Author

Thanks for reading and commenting, RTalloni. Overall, I wish I hadn't joined, difficult thing to undo. I'm not on it much, but even the little time I spend on it is a waste. However, b/c of FB I started writing again, so, there's that. I can see pros and cons..."enhance" though is a strong word ;-).


greencha profile image

greencha 3 years ago from UK

Thats interesting, however I did use Facebook for a while and found it exciting. But when I started getting e-mails from Facebook,telling me so and so wants to be my friend etc,all over the planet,I started getting very suspicious ,if that in fact is the case,OR was this just computer generated crap.... how can someone we never met suddenly be our fiend when we never met 'em. The other thing is I was losing confidence that Facebook was keeping my personal details private,

So I am still very wary about Facebook,and I warn people to ttread carefully with it.


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 3 years ago Author

That seems pretty wise to me, Greencha. FB these days gives me a lot of the news/blog highlights that are useful to me, and I use it to kid around mostly. As I'm making the transition to working at home more, I find that FB is a great distraction, but also a really big distraction! I could probably do without it. But I also know it is the ONLY way that some of my long distance friends and I ever hear from one another. It's not caused me any harm yet, but judicious measure is probably in order. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!


greencha profile image

greencha 3 years ago from UK

Yes I understand what you say ,I am interested why you prefare Facebook to contact your friends rather than e-mailing,as you know e-mailing is a little bit more personal..


ahostagesituation profile image

ahostagesituation 3 years ago Author

I private message them normally which is the same thing maybe. FB is just a better reminder for me than my email account. But even commenting on some random post they've made, is still a way to stay in their lives without a lot of effort. Not that I mind the effort, it's just that I get to more people that way when I want to. I've met a lot of people. My close friends and I are in touch daily or close to it. Doesn't really take as much thought :-).


greencha profile image

greencha 3 years ago from UK

Oh ,thanks for letting me know It took me long enough to get me to understand how the e-mail system worked many moons ago.....

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