Ten Uncommon Responses To Extremely Common Questions / Statements Not Recommended For Use When Attempting to Communicate

All Ten Responses Have Personally Been Field Tested by Me, and the Resulting Reactions Were Equally Inconclusive

1. "We haven't heard from you lately."
" I took a temporary vow of silence."

2. " We haven't seen you lately."
" I've been invisible."

3. " What are you doing tonight.? "
" Fighting crime thanks for asking."

4. " Where were you last night ? "
" Having an out of body experience. "

5. " So tell me something about yourself."
" I know something you don't know."

6. " Everybody is going to die someday."
" Foolish Mortal."

7. " You want to hear something strange."
" Not without notice."

8. " Are you listening to me?"
" I love all insects."

9. " Is something on your mind?"
" I am guided by voices."

10. "What is the meaning of this?"
" I want to be a duck ."

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Comments 22 comments

mythbuster profile image

mythbuster 6 years ago from Utopia, Oz, You Decide

I'm gonna try these next time I go to a round-table lmao


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

I know you wanna be a duck, probably a malard. =)


drbj profile image

drbj 6 years ago from south Florida

Funny rejoinders, Blake.

I used to use this retort when someone said, "I've missed you." I responded, "Bad aim?" But I stopped when I realized the other person was just being sincere and I was being sarcastic.


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

You could have been really mean...

"I've missed you."

"Then you better start making some friends."

I actually had that one done to me. Zing ouch. It cut prerry deep. =) Blake4d


Ivorwen profile image

Ivorwen 6 years ago from Hither and Yonder

Tonight I could really use one of those pills.

#6 would be fun to try out sometime. I know a few people who would get a good laugh out of it. Thanks for the smiles.


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Thanx Ivorwen. Don't know if we've met before, I appreciate the comment. When 6 hits the mark, it can make a whole roon of casual listeners giggle in unison.


kimberlyslyrics 6 years ago

5 and 6

Im stealing

saying their mine

lol

kimberly

lol


Mike Lickteig profile image

Mike Lickteig 6 years ago from Lawrence KS USA

Nice list. Like Kim (above), I like 5 and 6. #7 was good also.

Mike


cupid51 profile image

cupid51 6 years ago from INDIA

Amazing list! I liked 5 the most!


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Thanx Mike and thanx to you also cupid,

Keep on Hubbing.


billyaustindillon profile image

billyaustindillon 6 years ago

Love number nine - Guided by Voices is one of my favorite bands :)


magnoliazz profile image

magnoliazz 6 years ago from Wisconsin

LOL..you are a breath of freah air, I bet life is never dull with you around.


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Wow Billy, Guided by voices rocks. You would jibe with my friend Troy big time I bet. If you also like Chrome, then you are a Stormtrooper of the highest degree. Thanx for checking my hubs. Blake4d

Well I'll tell ya Magnoliazz since you asked. 99% of the world thinks pretty well of me if not highly, and we have a lot of fun. I am a Gemini, so communication is my superpower. But man, 1% of the world not only hates me instantly upon meeting me. They usually end up being some kind of mortal enemy that I have to contend with - willingly or unwillingly.

The net is nice in that way, I can be a bit detatched and all the more confortable. I told ya I'd give you a lighter hub today to make up fior the darkside yesterday. Sleep well...? LOL


magnoliazz profile image

magnoliazz 6 years ago from Wisconsin

I figured you were either a Libra or a Gemini! Gemini explains your super intelligence.

As for sleep..I never sleep well. LOL...now after what you told me about the Anubis, I worry that I will wake up and see it standing in the corner of my bedroom. That has happened more than once, too. Of course, I figured it just had to be my imagination ...right?

There is a very thin line between real/unreal.

Are you going to write a hub about some of the experiences your family has had?

This is as bad as being a little kid and having your big brother scare you with spooky stories! LOL...why are we sooo hooked on being scared? Its a kind of addiction you know!


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Maybe, you gotta understand most of them are in Kentucky and we never see or talk to each other. Mostly due to their views on me being a mud person (not just white) they are very racist about it. And for the most part my family I have to respect their right not to have such things publicized, most are nazarines, snake handler Christians. Such events would be considered devil worship, and could jeapordize their lives in the Appliachian mining indusstry the union they work for. So maybe, its not completely my call. And i figure your family is owed respect on the spiritual privacy if anyone is. Rightt?


magnoliazz profile image

magnoliazz 6 years ago from Wisconsin

Yes, you have a point. I would not like one of my family members writing their version of my experiences.

Although, if they call you a "mud person" maybe they should get what they deserve. I can't believe they are still back in the dark ages. It is so cruel. Still, I appreciate your respect for their privacy.

I was always under the impression that many of the people of Appalachia were of mixed decent with the Native American tribes who once lived there. Almost all the earliest Americans in that area were male and they often took Indian wives. And...if not for those native American women, I doubt those men would have survived.

Finally history is honoring some of those women, but it has been a very long time coming.

In this area of Wisconsin, no one thinks anything if a white marries a Native American. Probably because there are so many Native Americans around. Black men/ white women that is pretty much still a taboo, but white man/black women, that's ok! LOL! I would like to think that in America, its not who you are it is what you are that matters. That's what made our country great in my opinion, we give people a chance.

And...it is always the people of mixed heritage who are the most intelligent. You need an influx of new blood in the gene pool every now and then. That's why the Amish are becoming more backward, they only marry within their group.

Oh well, I will just have to go back and read some of your earlier hubs, they look interesting too. You know sooo much about so many things!


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Well very few places are as old in America as Louisville Kentucky, and not everyone inmy family is that racist. But the ones that are are very poor, with little or no education, in jobs that they will likely die in, and not a chance to change their posiiton or status. I may not respect how they treat me or other people, but why would I add to it by acting as if they don't deserve some respect. I will not be dying in a coal mine with black lungs. They will. They are very hard workintg earthy people. Theyir perspective is that I am spoiled, plus I have white, haitian, and native american blood. It is the mixing of the black and red that offends them not the white with either of the other two. See if you have no educaion, and no status, to bring up a child in their area with even lower breeding. I wouldn;t be able to get a job, or anything, native americans cant joing a union . They are not American citizens, yoknow that right? It is much more complicated than perhaps you rezlize. Luckily my mom and I left and I don't live by those rules...


blondepoet profile image

blondepoet 6 years ago from australia

Wow Blake next time some-one says "Are you listening to me", I am going to tell them I am a pray mantis and I will eat them during reproduction LMAO. You reckon that will do the job?


magnoliazz profile image

magnoliazz 6 years ago from Wisconsin

You are a very decent and mature person. Hopefully with Obama getting elected as president, America has turned a corner. When I see Obama or Oprah, I don't see black or white, I just see a human being, the same as anyone.


blake4d profile image

blake4d 6 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Indeed it might BP. Perhaps too well infact. LOL

On my good days yes. Magnoliazz, and on somedays I am just a little SOB, but I try my best, and my best is often far beyond what I thought I was capable of. Glad you enjoy my dark humorous sides...they are for the entertainment of all. Bow for the audience, they are your feet my jester like sons and daughters. Lovers and Friends. Blake4d


dreamreachout 5 years ago

Blake, your humour is always thunderous with lots of spin and magnitude!!

Cheers!!


blake4d profile image

blake4d 4 years ago from Now Rising Out of Phoenix Arizona Earthlings Author

Thanx DR. Much love, Keep on Hubbing. Blake4d

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