The Dream - Excerpt from a Novel in Progress

One night, as Marlow lay in her bed, the loud sound of a trumpet broke through her sleep and penetrated her thoughts. Slowly rising from her bed, she and stepped softly to the small window that was eerily similar to the one she had imagined in the dream of her father. Cautiously, she moved her curtains to allow a view of the skies, as a foreign feeling filled her body from the inside. She could feel her heart beat faster, feel her breath catch in her throat as she took in what she saw. The window overlooked a vast field lined with large trees of all kinds. The sky seemed to be opening up, there was a vast, dark hole there, darker then midnight blue of the typical night sky, and no stars were in this hole, they stopped right around the edge: the jagged edge of this circle in the sky.

The trumpet continued to blast through her mind, and she exhaled slowly with the fear that she was the only one on this earth to hear this trumpet. A clouded light crept into the darkened area of the sky, and she fought the urge to run back to her bed, where she would hide under the cover.

Instead, Marlow watched as the small patch of light grew, and in the circle of extreme darkness this patch of light became brighter, so that there was the allusion of daylight in this small patch of night sky.

Tears formed in her eyes, which she quickly blinked away, afraid she would miss something important. Something was there in the sky, in that patch of light. Her heart beat faster, and she realized she was seeing a single white horse, suspended in the sky, and she felt every hair on her body rise as she realized that upon the white horse was a heavenly Being dressed in robes of gold and silver. Both the horse and the Being had great wings. This Being looked to be human, but she could not determine if it were man or woman. Although far away in the sky, she could see the crystal eyes of the thing penetrating her gaze, looking directly into her eyes, an expression of great sadness on its delicate face. “You are the one to end this, child.” The voice was in fact musical, although laden with the sadness. She felt a breath on her ear and turned her head sharply, but nothing was there. It was as if the Being was standing right beside her, but she realized the voice was in her mind. Her heart was beating so fast, she was afraid as she turned her face back to the window. She saw a great silver instrument in the hands, and the being brought it up; she realized it was a trumpet. This thing brought the trumpet to its mouth, and again Marlow heard the loud sound, and this sound filled her with every emotion and she fell to her knees softly and tears flowed down her cheeks with sadness; anger filled her heart; and her head ached with pain and sorrow.

Suddenly, a great cloud filled the sky, entering through the opening of light that had slashed the darkness. It was if she could hear the pounding of hooves colliding with ground; the pounding of waves hitting a rocky shoreline; she could feel the trembling of thunder. She could almost feel the heart of mankind beating, as she could feel her own, as if the beats were all of one heart. She could feel their breath on her skin, feel the fear. Sweat formed on her brow as a dark cloud floated from across the horizon, partially blocking the light. It appeared as a normal cloud at first, and suddenly thunder and lightening flashed across the sky. She watched in fear as multiple tornadoes seemed to form instantly in the sky, tearing down the trees in the field, heading straight towards her, intent on destroying her.

A sharp and staggering pain brought her to the floor, and for a brief moment, the soft carpet felt as cold and hard as stone.

“You are the one to end this, child.” The melodic voice chimed. Suddenly, the vision was gone, and she was staring into a star filled night sky. She stared, unblinking, as a single star fell from the sky, a tail of light trailing behind it. Her heart beat began to slow down to regular again, and the tears upon her face dried.


Comments 3 comments

Aka Professor M 5 years ago

@Krazikat: There is a mystical, almost mythical yet also religious felt to the passage above, Krazikat! You weave the scene well, as the reader, is like your heroine held in a spell awaiting the Angelic, Mystical apparitions!

I especially like the use of the Pegasus-like winged Steed, With The Angelic Trumpeter whose music and words carry the reader with the haunting question as to what this all is leading to!

Using familiar representations establishes a commonality which the more experienced readers will be quickly able to feel connected with the key elements of the story! With such a connection the audience already is willing to continue to read as their curiosity is engaged.

For me this has established itself as having potential and worth my time to follow it further! Nicely done Kat!

I voted this up and pushed all the appropriate tabs as well!

Thanks for the entertaining read and the honor of you choosing to follow me! I will be paying more attention to your hubs and may reciprocate as a follower later!

Regards Mike (Aka Professor M!) ;D


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krazikat 5 years ago from Pacific Northwest Author

Aka Professor M. I really appreciate the detailed feedback you provide, this helps me feel like I am on the right track with my writing. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond!!!


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Nickels-and-Sense 5 years ago from New Orleans, Louisiana

apocalyptic, yet peaceful in nature; very visual. I wish there was a link to the next chapter. I'm very curious where you go from here. one up and beautiful!

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