The Genetically Altered Tomatoes vs. The Creature From The Black Lagoon


The creature from the black lagoon gave his wife a wink and sat down to a plate of fried tomatoes that he had been told would be extremely tasty because they had been genetically altered to grow big and delicious. He had a long hard day in the swamp wrestling with alligators for their skin for his new alligator wallet venture and sure was hungry.

His wife held her breath as he took his first bite. The expression on his face changed from one of anticipation to that of puzzlement. The tomato was surprisingly flavorless. He wondered whether it was really a tomato at all or was he getting paranoid. Then there was a rumbling sound and he let go with a gut wrenching howl.

He got up and ran to the back yard and into the swamp, past the kiddie swings and sandbox, past the bugs, past the alligators in the swamp and into the Out House. He unbuttoned the flap on the seat of his scaly green skin suit and sat down over the big hole with the smile his little girl painted around it.

The entire state of Florida turned brown. The wild animals all died and the hurricanes refused to enter Florida ever again.

"I'm a tough cookie," thought the creature from the black lagoon, " but nobody wins them all. I guess I better not insult anymore genetically altered tomatoes."

His stomach felt terrible for a week. It hurt so much he went to church and got religion. He never ate another genetically altered tomato and turned down an offer to endorse them on the Internet. But he is considering feeding them to the alligators. But he doesn't want to be mean to the alligators. He just wants to turn them into wallets.

They all lived happily ever after.

The End


Image by wickedneuron via Flickr

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Comments 8 comments

justmesuzanne profile image

justmesuzanne 5 years ago from Texas

Cute! ;D Voted up and funny!


Wrath Warbone profile image

Wrath Warbone 5 years ago from Cleveland, Ohio Author

Thanks, justmesuzanne. Thanks for reading it.


randy 5 years ago

funny stuff..... how did she cook them? fried?


Wrath Warbone profile image

Wrath Warbone 5 years ago from Cleveland, Ohio Author

Hi randy. Yep, she fried them. Didn't do much good, though. lol!


nikashi_designs 5 years ago

Thanks for making me laugh...

Do you sell the wallets? Fun and short read. So not to waste the tomatoes you could market them as a natural laxative...


Wrath Warbone 5 years ago

Thanks nikashi_designs! What a terrific and enjoyable comment! I am glad you found a good use for the bizarre tomatoes! lol! Thanks again.


Mel Carriere profile image

Mel Carriere 16 months ago from San Diego California

That's some surreal stuff there, but entertaining and in some ways meaningful as well. Great hub.


Wrath Warbone profile image

Wrath Warbone 16 months ago from Cleveland, Ohio Author

Thanks, Mel. Made my day!

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