Epic Fantasy Poem - The Sun Shone Down

To set the mood...

The sun shown down

on a sleepy little town.

All throughout the day,

children smile at play,


All take for granted

this life enchanted.

None guard for dark,

evil, cold and stark.


On this day a maiden awakes

and as each morn, she bakes.

Seven brothers who like to eat,

luckily there’s still some meat.


The oldest, Gregor, will hunt today

in the woods yet more food to slay.

For last weeks boar is almost gone.

More will be needed to feast upon.


Humming as she toils.

Bread rises. Water boils.

Sounds of brother's teases

waft down on warm breezes.


All is right within the land.

The family, a merry band,

greeting the day with glee,

happy, joyous and free.


After eats each departs.

Now, the work day starts.

None bemoans the coming labor

the fruits of which all will savor.


Gregor is off to the big wood

Pytre and Peatro too could,

but they are working in the fields

guarding over the expected yields.


Yanyell, Michiael and Mark are going to market

leaving Alexia the youngest to be the target

of the good priest who is later expected,

thinking all by him should be directed.


The priest makes rounds each day.

Lunch today, this family will pay

for the priest never toils himself

always claiming to be in poor health.


And so, our family is each set to their task

with no idea the good priest is but a mask,

a thin veil of projected faith covering pure sin

harboring unbridled envy, hate, and lust within.


This family he has long watched in vain

wanting to corrupt and cause great pain.

Never a break in the unity to breech,

so his master he finally beseeched.


Sacrifices of blood and bone

laid upon the dark alter stone.

The master must be paid,

if he is going to lend aid.


The priest paid him. He did

just so that he could be rid

of the light that causes him pain,

an envy that he cannot contain.


This day his plans, finally, will come to fruition,

as long as he gets the girl, the Master's condition.

And so, today his smile is almost actually real

adding to the glamour of his priestly appeal.


Up the way and through the gate to the door,

none has any idea at all what he has in store.

One knock, then two, echo through the house.

He composes his face looking meek as a mouse.


As Alexia welcomes him into the humble abode

no one would have guessed as the priest strode

he was bringing a hateful gift.

One that would start the rift


to split a family asunder,

never knowing the blunder

about to be taken by each,

allowing the priest to breech


the familial love shared that holds them as one.

Taking the offered chair he says "Thank you, son."

"Where is your dear sister this fine day?"

"She went to gather eggs and surely will say


upon her return that the birds are in quiet a state.

She always feels bad putting their eggs on plates.

She imagines them to be upset with her taking

what they have diligently labored over laying."


"I see, my dear boy. She really is such a sweet lass."

Thinking to himself, just wait till I get my hands on your ass.

“Before I forget, my son, I brought a gift for the lot of you

but you must swear that everyone gets a piece or two".


Alexi graciously accepted what looked to be so sweet.

"Thank you, Sir. You are very kind to bring a treat.

I give you my vow, on my honor, we all shall partake

this most decadent looking desert that you baked."


Through the afternoon the brother and sister both

exchanged words kindly with what they should loath,

never suspecting that by the end of that very night

the whole family would be in the very worst of fights.


As twilight approached and the family reunited.

About the coming meal they all were excited.

Smiling at each other and recounting the day

all pleasantly exchanged what they had to say


Then came that one second, a pivotal point in time,

the point at which was truly the scene of the crime.

Alexi announced to all, "Look what the priest brought."

Each took a bite. Too late, the evil deed was wrought.


It tasted so very luscious and delicately sweet.

Through everyone's blood it began to creep.

The spell was written in stone.

It went straight to the bone.


Each person began to think in twisted ways,

imagined slights, ways to make them pay.

Each within their own confusion stewed.

Hatred inside their heart began to brew.


Before long they could not hold it in.

That was when the screaming did begin.

Each person ripping the others apart,

covering things back to the very start,


all the way back to when each was but a child.

The slights of childhood were meant to defile.

For you see, the spell only brought it out,

what was long ago hidden, pain and doubt.


The most hurtful things were hastily said.

Yelling and screaming soon to action led.

Just as things were getting really rough,

there was a pounding on the door abrupt.


No one cared, everyone was in a rage.

No one answered, all were engaged.

But the door flew inwards from it's hinge.

In shock it was that dear Karina cringed.


She had taken only the smallest bite.

She was not as enraptured with the fight,

looked to the priest who had just burst in

to calm what she loved, those raging within.


The tiny house so full of peace

had become inhabited by beasts.

People who have lost their way

can be cruel in what they say.


The priest puffed up and stared them down

bellowing words of "Quiet!” began to sound.

"I don't know what’s going on here,

but it is for the young ones I fear.


If you men wish to act like fools

breaking decent behavior rules

that is you choice, though I don’t approve,

but you will not harm the two I remove.


Alexi and Karina come with me straight away.

It is with me that tonight you two will stay.

safe and warm within my righteous home.

I will not think to leave you here alone".


Karina rose without hesitation

Alexi was slower to leave his station.

The priest was firm. He would not leave.

He made them all to truly believe


that he knew best. His was the way,

that he was there to save the day.

And so, the youngest two siblings went.

No one knew their future was now spent.


Till the sun rose high in the sky,

the fighting continued to ring on high.

As the sun's cleansing rays through windows shone,

the curse was lifted and all the crazy hatred was gone.


The men looked around the table, ashamed at each other.

None could stand the look in eyes of his very own brother.

Each remembered the hate in his heart,

Apologizing they all at once did start,


Forgiveness and fellowship was given to all.

Amongst manly hugs Gregor did call,

“Come brothers, to the good Priest's.

We must apologize for behaving as beasts.


Poor Karina and Alexi must be miserable.

Perhaps their stay was less than dismal.

Let us go and bring them now home.

Let us bring them where they belong.


Before dawn, as the Priest walked along

with young whom to a family did belong,

his Master, The Devil. had let himself in.

The Priest's home he was waiting within.


Uttering calming words all the while

the Priest did the two young beguile.

With gentle words sounding sweet

thinking on this night he would eat


of the flesh that had tortured him so.

True goodness within them did flow.

Tonight he would feast upon the innocent,

no longer would his torment be frequent.


During this most unholy hour,

he would offer the girl on a bower.

The boy would be just his, all alone.

He would chew upon his very bones.


When the young ones entered the door,

nothing stirred but they felt it to the core,

the evil that lurked within,

the sadism about to begin.


As one they turned to try to run.

The master shot as if from a gun

to block the only way out.

No escape. Never a doubt.


Through the wee hours until dawn

Satan and the Priest did feast on

that which neither deserved to look upon,

until the young from this earth were gone.


But not before horrors beyond reason did befall

each in front of the other, hearing the screaming calls

for mercy ignored, as the living flesh from each was torn.

Agonies anew time after time after time were freshly born.


With each live bite their innocence and purity flowed like water.

In the end each sibling's heads was severed, placed on the alter,

trophies demonically displayed in the blood soaked room

eyes now fogged over as they stared out into the gloom.


Just as the dawn was about to approach

upon the Priest the master did encroach.

Taking him from behind he broke his neck

cackling, "Really man, what did you expect?


That I owe you some loyalty for this meal?

You should know, bastard, that’s not the deal.

I helped you only to gain the girl.

Now my disgust with you I unfurl.


You don't deserve to be my slave.

In my firey hell daily will I raise

your soul to abase again, anew.

You deserve it. You know you do."


With the final word Satan left in a cloud of ash

as the men were just starting to end the bash.

From the outside no one would ever have known

what inside the village priest's house had gone on.


On the way to retrieve their kin

the brothers had no clue to begin

mourning. They would never again see

the family that was no longer to be.


When arriving at the Priest's door,

they thought to apologize some more.

When entering each slipped on the gore

that now covered the whole and entire floor.


They screamed grievous cries in the face

of what was held within this wretched place.

Seeing the heads of the ones they adored

each, as one, the brothers were totally floored.


Drained of love and light

helpless to aid in the plight

of what had gone on last night

the horror, the pain and fright.


As the lamentations poured out

each cursed at himself aloud.

It had finally came to and to them all

the lesson to have stopped this fall.


The moral of this tragic tale

is one that you should hale.

Grudges held long within

open a doorway for sin.


The spell used to destroy this family

only worked because of their vanity,

each allowing his heart to hold

grudges stupid, petty, and old,


so small as to go unnoticed

but creating a tiny coldness,

a chink in the armor of joy

that undid a girl and a boy.


Be sure to forgive each night.

Be sure your heart is right.

For if you don’t you may loose

much more than you would choose.

.(c) Vix a.k.a Rhonda Enrayne 8-7-10


People sometimes ask me, "What inspired you?"

I can only reply, this time, as per usual, I really don't know. I sat down and started typing and the preceeding is what happened.

I can tell you I love Tolkien, Robert Jordan and Chaucer. If any works inspired me it would have to be those. The first two are in my opinion only two of the best fantasy writers ever. As for Chaucer, well honestly I love the flow of his words.

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Comments 15 comments

Inkwell780 6 years ago

Where to begin? Your poetry has such alliterative quality to it. Your ability to rhyme is just unbelievable. I saw this a while ago when you had just started putting it down in runes of words. I love the story line, delightfully-dementing. BTW.... I LOVE J.R.R. Tolkien as you probably already know. He is a source of inspiration to me as well. Love the Hub, and Muse, with tender respect, Matt. James R.

poetvix profile image

poetvix 6 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Thank you yet again Inky for not only your kind words but for taking the time to read my story.

I don't know what came over me really. I sat down yeterday evening and opened the file which was about half done and somehow the rest just poured out all at once. It was kinda nifty.

Micky Dee profile image

Micky Dee 6 years ago

Very good Poetvix! Where is that Cecil B DeMille guy?

poetvix profile image

poetvix 6 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Thank you Micky...I'm not sure. But I think he may be hiding.

sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Hi Vix- Just catching up on some of my favorite writers and you are one as I've already told you. as dark as this tale was, you created light at the end of the tunnel. You never need to apologize for your fine imagination. Your natural rhythm and beat and rhyme makes your poetry seem effortless but I know that it is not. The family was Disney-like at first, circa Snow White and 7 men. Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, its off to work we go...LOL. The two-faced evil priest reminded me of no prior character. The satanic flesh feast was really fantastic, albeit gruesome. This was a great write! Keep writing. You are wonderful.

poetvix profile image

poetvix 5 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Sligobay :) Thank you so much for taking the time as I know this just goes on and on and on... but then, I guess that's just my style.

It's too kewl that you say that about Snow White because guess what bud, you're right! I had that exact song in my head when I started this and it was supposed to move to that rhythm.

I'm not really sure how the priest came about other than I needed a villain and he's what happened!

Thank you very much for your ongoing kindness and support.

pan1974 profile image

pan1974 5 years ago from Columbus,Ga

Wow, you are just so talented.

poetvix profile image

poetvix 5 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Thanks Pan for your kind words. :)

BenWritings profile image

BenWritings 5 years ago from Save me from, Tennessee

good stuff

KeithTax profile image

KeithTax 5 years ago from Wisconsin

Beautiful. I need to read more poetry.

poetvix profile image

poetvix 5 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Keith Tax ~ Thank you. I need to step out of my dedication to poetry and fiction and get better informed about the real issues facing our country. The more I'm learning, the scarier it gets, much more so than the best scary verse I ever composed.

epigramman profile image

epigramman 4 years ago

..hi Rhonda - how are ya doing buddy - I have missed you in legendary proportions and I know you have dropped by from time to time (always a highlight for me as I so much admire you as a writer and esteemed fellow colleague) and that is the reason why I have to be a gallant white knight here and post this beautiful epic piece of writing (which you are so famous for) to my FACEBOOK page with a direct link back here .....I am a big big fan of your writing as stated in earlier comments of course but no one and I mean no one writes like this or in your own inimitable style and you always rule epi's world - astonishing, well just like you!

lake erie time ontario canada 12:19an please have a happy safe and fun holiday season

poetvix profile image

poetvix 4 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Dearest Epi ~ I always smile when I see your face. Thank you for dropping in and reading this somewhat old now tale/fable/poem, whatever it is :). It was fun to write. I love your epigrams! You are more varied in range than anyone I know. I never cease to be amazed at how you can take the reader to the depths of despair and an hour later publish something that makes me laugh until I'm crying.

Thank you so much for the Facebook link! I have to say, I miss writing the stories but lately I'm just too angry about some political and social issues to focus on much else. I do have something floating around up in the old noodle but haven't put anything down as it's so dark and disturbing it's kind of freaking me out. I thought for a while it might just go away but that doesn't seem to be the case. I guess I will have to break down eventually and just let it out or I'm going to be having nightmares.

I miss seeing you every day and am so very happy to be on vacation now so that I can. This year has been so hectic at times I come home and just literally pass out upon arrival. I think I'm getting old. God bless you my dear Hubber friend. Merry Christmas to you and may the new year bring you blessings in abundance as you do for us every time you publish.

epigramman profile image

epigramman 4 years ago

....I truly do admire your passion Rhonda about the politics of your country ( another hubber in the same vein is THE MAN WITHOUT PANTS) .....but at the same time I miss your creative writing too - just remember the yin and yang of life - and try to balance it all out in the end ......what kind of music do you listen to?

lake erie time 1:11 am - I will return my list.

poetvix profile image

poetvix 4 years ago from Gone from Texas but still in the south. Surrounded by God's country. Author

Dear Epi ~ Thank you. The yin and yang of life huh? I will have to remember that as it is true and I am notorious for extremes even though I tell myself to watch for it always. Sigh, then I tell me to shut it! :) As for music, I like many kinds such as alternative rock, classic rock, all rock, but I must admit, deep down in my heart of hearts, I'm a metal head! Long live metal! Jamming on Iron Maiden in my head now while scanning the Rules of Acquisition… oh yea, I’m a bit of a trekie too!

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