The first rib came from........

 

The first rib came from Adam,

and formed his lovely Eve,
how delicious that must

have been for him,
when God saw potential

in what ribs concieve.

My first rib came with

blazing hot sauce,
and a dare that it'd

make me sick,
my face turned so red

that a neighboring table

thought someone should

give me the Heimlich.

 

It took four jugs of water,

 two beers and some bread,

before I could thank them and say,

I am really quite fine,

I'm just sunburned inside,

but that was my last

hot rib that day.

Ever Since then I stick

to a much milder sauce,
or should I say it sticks on me.
after 72 napkins, and a

couple warm cloths,


I like it best when the

meat falls off the bone,
Hoist one burnt crisp

end, and suckle
the whole thing real quick

so you don't miss
a single shred of meat,

Like some extra large
adult pacifer till the

rib is cleaned.

Pork, Beef, Chinese,

Baby back, Western style,
I aint picky except when

it comes to vacumming
each and every delectable tidbit.


I feel sorry for the

Muslims who are left
to nibble on dry pita bread

and thin sliced lamb.
no wonder so many

become terrorist.

My record for rib eating

 is 37 ribs in one sitting,
I would've eaten 38 but

then I didn't want to feel
too uncomfortable

the rest of the night.

I've always had an

affinity for Miss Piggy,
Just the thought of her

laid out on a bed
of let us, looking saucy and steamy,
makes my mouth water.


I can understand why

the big bad wolf
almost blew out a lung

trying to get
some rib tickling  

culinary delight.

But there are plenty of restaurants
that save me the trouble of chasing
a porky puppett, they steam, baste,

and barb-e-que, far more lovely

racks then she ever displayed in her career.

Think I'll call in a take out order,
and wrap up this poem.
don't want to get sticky sauce
all over my keyboard.
Bone appetit.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~MFB III





More by this Author

  • Autumn Gleanings.
    2

    From the Palette of Mother Nature. You know where to go with a doubt Behold the handicrafts of God, ~ observe now as his Winter looms, ~ stitch needled specks of crystal white. Each weaving flawless, thick...

  • The Constipation Of The United Blights Of America.
    0

    The Constipation of the United Blights of America ©-MFB III “ We the Puppets of the divided states, both red and blue, in disorder choose to deform a more perfect Union. We hang like...

  • Robin My Hood
    1

    On the first day of xmas your true love gave you a schadenfreude Robin my hood... on April 1, 2004. ©-MFB III- All rights reserved As the rains subsided, I spied a mother Robin today dancing on clawed...


Comments 10 comments

Deborah Shemesh profile image

Deborah Shemesh 6 years ago from www.deborahshemesh.com

You are quite the clever one!!

I'm hungry just thinking about

ribs, sauces, and the mess involved.

This is a great poem for all rib shops.


MFB III profile image

MFB III 6 years ago from United States Author

So glad I could tickle your ribs with something savory and tantalize your taste buds. You are so tright, this would be great on a rib joints menu. LOL~~MFB III


SilverGenes 6 years ago

Oh my yes! Or on a special placemat :)

The Miss Piggy part is hilarious! Thanks for the fun read!


Kaie Arwen profile image

Kaie Arwen 6 years ago

Ah! I didn't expect this to be funny............... thanks for the smile ~Kaie


billyaustindillon profile image

billyaustindillon 6 years ago

I had a good laugh and you brought me back to a MASH episode where Hawkeye ordered from Adam's rib - amazing I haven't thought of that since I watched it how many years ago?


Sa`ge profile image

Sa`ge 6 years ago from Barefoot Island

Now I need to go to the fridge an get me something to eat!

thanks for the great poem as always you make me smile, this time you made me hungry too! LOL ~aloha nui~


always exploring profile image

always exploring 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

So cute and clever,

You can get the most succulent ribs @ piggly wiggly

they,re so good and juicy

with a savory sauce

then a green salad you toss

makes for a meal

that gives one a good feel


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 6 years ago

OmG I am just squealing here like a Piggy with Hot sauce on her piglet tail. Stack em, rack em up, pile them high, like chicken wings off a HOOTER. Ribs are my number one finger licking, lip smackin, bone sucking meat treat.

Ribs are my dibs anytime..spicy, hot, sticky, gooey, saucy, bbqued, meat falling off the bone. Gotta love em.

Now I'm starving, I'm heading over to my favorite Rib Shack next to my sugar shack. Yippy Yi Oh Kyee


Granny's House profile image

Granny's House 6 years ago from Older and Hopefully Wiser Time

What a great tribute to ribs. You are so funny.


ladyjane1 profile image

ladyjane1 6 years ago from Texas

Cute poem and it made me hungry. I love me some ribs. Cheers

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working