To: My Man in The Can
Listen while you read & DANCE too!!
Yee HAW!! It's that thar BLAKE!!!
Tell Me a Secret!
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Dear "Pig Sty"
Lots of folks told me to write you a letter,
'Bout how, since yer gone, everything's better.
I figured I might, so I stayed up all night,
So this here's my letter to read if you might.
The kids are just fine, they don't ask 'bout you,
With chores and all that, they got more to do.
Ray mows the lawn, Tommy dumps out the trash
They say it beats seein yer sorry ash.
The neighbors like always, tend to poke in my business,
Hank says if I want, he'll be a witness
His wife really hates you, she's glad you ain't here
To gawk at her chest and fondle her rear
The paper boy brought me the news today
That yer back in the can and this time, to stay
Yer drinkin and cursin was too much for us,
I hear when they cuffed you, you put up a fuss.
My sister and kids came to dinner last night
They finally admitted that you "just ain't right."
We won't be to see you, so don't be awaitin
Jes talk to yer cell mate, first cuzin to Satan
Yer barn's been cleaned out, all yer porno is gone.
I'm dating the Mayor, we're out until dawn.
He says to tell you, "Thanks for the vote."
And how he loves fishin in yer brand new boat
Grandpa died and left me his bank book
His last words to you were, "Rot, you damned crook."
Grandma, she's lonely, but she'll be O.K.
Long as shut out and locked up yer gonna stay
So, guess I'll be goin, I told you the news
And by the way, when you lay down to snooze
Remember we "dis" you an awful damned lot
If you come back around, yer bound to get shot.
Hope my letter brightened yer day
With love, hugs and kisses, Yer Wife DAISY MAY
**See Pig Sty's reply to Daisy at:
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