The Day My World Changed~Part 1~

I've been thinking about writing this for weeks now going back and forth, should I or shouldn't I. What will people think if I do? The more I contemplate doing it, the more I'm realizing that there are probably people out there who need to hear what I have to say. This has always been very heart-wrenching for me and will be until the day I die. This isn't an easy subject for a lot of people, and then again, there are those who just don't care.


The day was so long,

It seemed to drag on for years....

My thoughts were racing so fast,

And I was shaking with fear!

I had no idea,

What was happening to me!

All I wanted was an answer,

And from this hell to be free!


It all started,

When I ran away,

From home and the chaos,

So dismal and gray....


Life was so good,

When Mom was alive,

We all were so happy,

For each other we would strive,

To do what was right,

And try to get along,

And encourage each other,

Even with a silly song.


But then came the day,

That Mom passed away.

My whole world just changed,

On my bed I just lay...

And cry, and cry,

And even cry some more.

My heart felt like it was ripped,

From the depths of my core.


After a few years,

I couldn't take life at home.

So I ran away,

Ending up just seeming to roam.


As I was walking,

One night down the street,

A car happened by me,

Two guys in the front seat.

I kept on walking,

Afraid to turn my head and see,

If they were looking,

And watching me.


I then realized,

They were keeping my pace,

I tried to walk faster,

As though I was in a race.


I glanced with my eyes,

To the right for to see,

What exactly was happening,

In the car next to me.


Two guys in the car,

Smiles ear to ear,

Watching me as I walk,

My heart gripped with fear!


No sooner did I look,

For the chance to see,

They jumped out of the car,

And grabbed me.


They managed to shove me,

In the back seat,

And took off like lightening,

My heart skipped a beat!


They drove to an apartment,

Somewhere near downtown,

And told me to be quiet,

Or I would never be found.


Out of the car,

They grabbed my arm,

Said to do what they say,

Or they'll give me great harm.


To the stairs we did walk,

No one talking at all.

On the right side was the short guy,

On the left was the tall.


Up the stairs we went,

To the second floor.

Upon arriving at the top,

They unlocked the door.


They shoved me inside,

And said, "GO SIT DOWN!"

It was then that I thought,

It's true, I may never be found....


The door was then shut,

Seven locks did I see,

All lined up on the door,

Now I'm trapped, two strange guys ... and me.


I stood there and stared,

As the locks were all turned.

I'm all gripped with fear,

And for freedom I yearned!


There were knives,

Behind the bar on the wall.

One of the guys grabbed one,

And headed down the hall.


The other got one,

Then came next to me.

To see how I would react,

As he put it by my knee.


He asked if I was scared,

So full of fear I couldn't speak.

My thoughts were going everywhere,

And I felt sick, nauseated and weak.


He took me down the hall,

To the room at the end.

The other guy was waiting,

For my clothes to rend.


They said they were cops,

And called the 'Sarge' on the phone.

I wanted to scream out,

"Please Sarge!! Rescue me!! Don't leave me here alone!!"


I soon then realized,

They weren't cops at all.

So I sat on the bed,

And I started to bawl.


One left the room,

And the other took over.

They both took their turns,

Under the cover.


The comments they made,

I can't even say...

They were worse than rude,

Crude and demeaning in every way.


Will this ever stop?

Will it ever end?

Oh how I wish,

I could just be with a friend....


I prayed in my mind,

To God, Please help me!

Get me out of this hell,

Please set me free!!


I want to escape,

But there is no way out.

The door is locked up,

I just want to shout!!!!


Time is going so slow,

Have I been here a year?

Am I losing my mind?

I can't take much more of this fear!


When they were all finished,

They let me know,

That it finally was time,

We needed to go.


Not through the door,

In which we came.

This way was different,

Not the same.


I had to crawl,

Out a window in back.

It went out to a porch,

No lights on, just pitch black.


One of them went,

To go get the car.

That was still parked out front,

Two doors down from a bar.


The other one stood,

On the porch watching me.

He used the door,

Not the window, you see.


Here comes the car,

I was told to jump,

From the second-story porch,

'Wow! I'll just go "thump",

Was my thought as I stood,

There scared as could be,

Is there any other way?

Does anyone even care, love or miss me?


I'm afraid of heights,

Been like that for years.

Fell down stairs as a child,

So, this was BIG fear!


But I knew in my mind,

There's no other way,

To get to the bottom,

But to jump, and say,

In my mind ... Dear God,

Please help me once more,

For I can't take the stairs,

And there's locks on the door!


It's amazing what happens,

When you are in danger,

Especially with a knife,

In the hand of a stranger.


So, I mustered up,

All the strength that's in me,

And I jumped off the porch,

And I wanted to flee!


To my amazement,

When I hit the ground,

It didn't even hurt,

Not an ache to be found.


I stood for a moment,

In amazement and awe,

That I wasn't injured,

Not a scratch or a flaw!


The car door was opened,

And they pushed me in,

To the back seat I went,

Then sped off with a grin.


Laughing out loud,

At what they had done,

How they had enjoyed it,

And had so much fun.


They drove me for blocks,

How many ... I don't know,

'Til they got to a corner,

And said, "You gotta go!"


As the car was still moving,

Around the corner they went,

The door was then opened,

And my body was sent,

Out of the car,

To the middle of the street,

It was then I discovered,

The taste of concrete.


They sped off still laughing,

At the whole ordeal,

As I am there laying,

So numb I can't feel.


I got to the curb,

To get to my feet,

And started to walk,

With the hope I would meet,

Someone to help me,

Someone to care,

But would I even ask?

Would I even dare?

Source

More by this Author

  •  Acorn Christian
    10

    Photo via flickr by vns2009 Did you ever think about an acorn? What significance does it really have? The squirrels think they are of importance! They love to eat them and then bury them to find later, but then can't...


Comments 67 comments

Binaya.Ghimire 5 years ago

wonderful. Voted up.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Binaya.Ghimire thank you for your kind comment and for your vote. It is appreciated. Have a great day! :-)


always exploring profile image

always exploring 5 years ago from Southern Illinois

Your poetry touched me. I felt your pain, sorry this happened to you, such cowards.

Hugs


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi always exploring thank you for taking the time to comment I do appreciate it. I hope that all who read this will be touched with compassion for those who are abused. There are many out there who have been hurt. May we all reach out to help in some way. It doesn't always involve money to get involved ... sometimes the only cost to you is your time.

I'm glad that my pain can through in my writing, I was hoping it would. Cowards is a compliment....

Thanks for the hugs.. hugs back to you too. Have a great day and God bless! :-)


saddlerider1 profile image

saddlerider1 5 years ago

Abuse is horrible no matter how it is dished out to the innocent. You were one of the fortunate ones who got away with her life. Many sadly were murdered and some never found. I saw abuse as a boy in my family and I know of many who felt the cowardly sting from beasts as these two pigs you describe here.

I wish they were all caught and rounded up and a razor taken to there genitals and dismembered for life. I hate cowards, predators,rapists who prey upon the female innocents of our world. This scribe has no shame in releasing it here, I have written often of my past, future and present.

It helps to get it out of your soul, you did just that in this poem. Bravo, nicely done.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi saddlerider1 thank you so much for commenting, your kind words of, 'Bravo, nicely done', and voicing your thoughts. They are much appreciated. Yes, abuse is horrible in every possible way. I am very fortunate and thankful that I was able to get away and survive. With all of the knives they had, it could have been otherwise.

There is more to this story than just this poem....

Eventually the police did get involved. When I was in the car, I looked up from the floor out the window to see street signs lit up by streetlights. I committed them to memory so I could tell someone, that was, if I lived.

I tried showing the police where the apartment was, but I couldn't find it. From the time I was shoved into the car, to when I saw the street signs, they had already driven far enough away from it.

I wish they had been caught and charged for what they did. God knows who they are. I leave it with Him to mete out justice.

Thanks again for your great comment. Have a great day and God bless! :-)


FaithDream profile image

FaithDream 5 years ago from (Midwest) USA

Field of Flowers :(

I am saddened by all this. Thank you for opening your heart to share this. You are a brave woman and you have a huge heart. May God bless your soul.

You had to face too many tragedies and yet look at you now. You are an amazing woman. Bless you.


ExoticHippieQueen 5 years ago

Oh, Field-of-Flowers, such a terrible thing for a young girl, any girl, to have to endure and carry around for years after! My heart goes out to you, and at the same time, I say "good for you", for not being afraid to lay it all out here on hubpages. I applaud your courage. Don't ever be afraid to share stories of personal events because after all, aren't we all here to grow, learn and share our lives with each other? We can't all just write about the frog on the log, which is fine, don't misinterpret me, I love article and poems about nature, but I also love when writers pour their emotions into their work, revealing their innermost pain and feelings. It changes the quality of the piece, knowing that it is real. I have shared many of my deepest hurts in my poetry and the occasional short story here on hubpages in what I hope is a fearless and courageous manner, and will continue to do so, and I have nothing but the greatest admmiration for all who do so with me.............Voted up and awesome, girl!


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi FaithDream thank you for your kind words and compliments about me, my heart is touched.

I'm sorry this has saddened you but this was something I needed to write about. Perhaps there will be those reading it who did the abusing, I don't know. But if by chance there is, hopefully they will see the terrible effect it has on someone and change their ways.

Have a great day and may God richly bless your life as well! :-)


Nefarious_Misery profile image

Nefarious_Misery 5 years ago from on the move

What amazing courage it must have taken to relive this experience through your writing. Amazing work.

Voted up and beautiful


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Nefarious_Misery thank you for your wonderful comments and your votes. They are very much appreciated!

Yes, it took a lot of courage and strength to write this. I sat for over 8 hours doing it. Having to relive it is very hard, but through it, I am hoping to touch peoples lives in some way.

Thanks again and have a great day! :-)


Dim Flaxenwick profile image

Dim Flaxenwick 5 years ago from Great Britain

Oh! My goodness. What a horrendous experience.

I am glad you lived to tell the tale, but for your sake I wish we could have an eraser inside us , to forget such dreadful happenings,.

What thugs! What cowards!, I´m sorry they were not brought to justice (although, they may do it again and be caught???!! Who knows?)

The picture says it all, with writing on the girls´back.

I hope you can get on with your life, you obviously have a strong faith in God, which always helps.

I feel for you, and thank you for having the courage to write this.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Dim thank you so much for your heartfelt comments. I honestly didn't think I was going to survive with everything that was happening. I am very grateful to be here. There are those who don't make it....

Sometimes I wish I had an eraser too... but... through all of the tragedies I've had in my life, they have only made me a stronger person.

Did they do it again???? Only God knows the answer to that. I hope not.... Yes, the picture says it all.

Knowing that I have God on my side helps me make it through life.

You are very welcome. I'm hoping my courage will help others who may have been abused/raped as well. Have a great day and God Bless you! :-)


Jackie Lynnley profile image

Jackie Lynnley 5 years ago from The Beautiful South

Many don't survive, you were very lucky, you should have gone to the police to have got their DNA to maybe get them six months in jail. Yes I am being sarcastic but not to you. If the law would ever put serious penalties on rapist there would be more second thoughts! May God help erase your memories and replace with something wonderful.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Jackie Lynnley thank you for commenting. Yes, I was very fortunate and I'm grateful to be alive. I did go to the police, after the fact, but I couldn't find the apartment. Perhaps if the law stated that all rapists would be castrated, there might not be any more assaults.

Have a great day and God bless you! :-)


Rosemay50 profile image

Rosemay50 5 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

Field of Flowers, what a lovely choice of name after such a thing has happened to you. You are very brave to open yourself up like this on hubpages. I admire you and hope that writing all of this down has somehow helped heal the pain.

May you always live in a field of flowers.


suziecat7 profile image

suziecat7 5 years ago from Asheville, NC

What a terrible experience. I'm glad you got through it and now have the courage to talk about it. I'm angry just thinking about these guys. Pigs. God bless your brave heart.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Rosemay50 thank you so very much for your kind words. The reason I chose this name is because of the picture that comes to mind when you think of it. I hope to be a 'field-of-flowers' to others.

The bravery you speak of comes from God. Also, I write in hopes of touching people's lives and hearts and making an impact.

'May you always live in a field of flowers.' ... for this, I thank you.

Have a great day and God bless you! :-)


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi suziecat7 thank you so much for commenting. A horrendous experience that could of ended differently. I could of died. I am very thankful I made it through it all.

I understand your anger....

God gives me bravery. I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me.

Have a great day and may God bless you too! :-)


Sarah Shepherd profile image

Sarah Shepherd 5 years ago from San Diego, California

What a sad, terrifying piece... I admire you sitting down and penning this to paper; and even more so for sharing it with so many eyes. My heart goes out to you. God Bless! Voted up and beautiful!


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Sarah Shepherd thank you for commenting and for your kind words. They mean a lot! It took me over 8 hours to write this, and with God's help, I did it. There is a lot more to this story than I have written so far. Part 2 is already written and I will continue to write however many parts need to be added to complete the story. As you will see, it will only get worse.

Thank you for the votes it is much appreciated. Have a great day and may God Bless you too! :-)


DTroth profile image

DTroth 5 years ago from My Little Hole In The Wall, HubPages, USA

Hi Carol,

Oh my goodness...you went through so much. Such sadness from losing your mom. Then to deal with such horror. Such pain. Such fear. Not knowing if you were gonna even survive the ordeal. What total a*sholes. Cowardice scumbags. Just because you ran away doesn't mean that ANY of this was your fault! You were a child trying to find your own way to cope with the devastation of losing your mom, and that's all.

Even still...it is a beautiful and heart wrenching poem and very well written. As hard as it is for you to relive the terror, I'm really glad you took the leap. It's very soul cleansing and healing to just get it out of your system, whether it's in writing or talking...it doesn't matter one bit. I've been doin' a bit of that myself lately. (: It's great here on HubPages. You'll never meet anybody here face to face, so the near anonymity really helps. There are many of us here at HP who have endured deep trauma's and we all feel this connection with each other because of it. You are NOT alone, sis!

Congratulations on finding your strength and the courage to just let it all out. (:

Much love and BIG hugs to you, Carol. And may peace and love remain in your heart and soul...always,

Diana


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Diana,

Thank you so very much for your wonderful comments. They are appreciated. I honestly thought I wasn't going to survive. Not with all of the knives they had and how they were swinging them around. There was a radio that was turned on. After the music played and the DJ would talk, in my mind... I was screaming out.. HELP!! HELP!! But I knew there wasn't any for me. Sometimes it boggles my mind when I realize I made it out. I had just turned 15 when this happened.

Cowardice scumbags is a compliment.

I'm glad you see it as beautiful, heart wrenching and very well written. I hope to touch lives through my writings. Part 2 was written as a continuation to this story, and there will be more. This is just the start of what is yet to come. Unfortunately, it only gets worse and much sadder.

I am writing because I feel in my heart it needs to be done. If there is even just one person I can touch somehow, what I set out to accomplish will be done.

The strength and courage I have comes from God.

Thank you for, "Much love and BIG hugs to you." I send love and hugs your way as well. Peace and love will always remain in my heart and soul. God gives it to me. There's no other way to live.

Have a great day and God bless you! :-)


Barbara Kay profile image

Barbara Kay 5 years ago from USA

I'm so sorry this happened to you. It is every woman's nightmare and you are a strong woman to have made it through it.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Barbara Kay thank you for your kind words. A nightmare indeed... unfortunately mine came true. I'm very fortunate to be sitting here writing. There are those who never survived.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Thanks for sharing your pain and for your follow. You'll find my history of abuse in my writings. As difficult as it sounds, I needed to voice my pain and then forgive my assailants in order to free myself of the anger and pain. I was only a child in second grade when I became hardened by the violence in school.I remained a victim for too many years. The anger and self-righteous indignation of the comments are all well and good. I would echo their sentiments if I thought it would help you. Too many people block their joy with judgement and anger. You deserve some joy by freeing yourself from the scars of this horrendous episode. Anger, resentment and the desire for revenge imprisons us to relive the crimes against us until the end of time. If this happened at age 15, it is OK for you to express the feelings but hopefully you will be able to learn to let this go and get free. I read a book called the Courage to Heal written by women who had been RAPED. I learned that I must "name it to claim it". I was sexually assaulted at the age of 14. I feel your pain but did not experience the same level of violence. I will keep you in prayer.


Yeshuan profile image

Yeshuan 5 years ago from North Carolina

The best writing comes from the heart. Even when the subject is a traumatic experience. There is no doubt that you helped yourself and someone else by sharing your pain.


lcbenefield profile image

lcbenefield 5 years ago from Georgia

I appreciate you sharing this. The writing is very precise. The pain and fear are very real. I voted up and awesome.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi sligobay thank you for your comments. I write in hopes of helping others. I'm so sorry to hear that you had been abused too. I feel your pain as well.... I'm glad that you were able to find forgiveness in your heart towards your assailants. Anger and resentment doesn't do anyone any good. The freedom I discovered from anger, pain, resentment, etc. comes from God. Thank you for your prayers... I appreciate them all.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Yeshuan thank you for your comment. I agree, the best writing does come from the heart, deep within. And, being that it is a tragedy I write about, I too believe that there is at least one other person I have helped. That is my goal through what I write... to help others out.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Icbenefield thank you for commenting. You are welcome. I'm glad I was able to portray what transpired that dreadful night through my writing. The pain... the fear... Thank you very much for all of your votes!

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


writer20 profile image

writer20 5 years ago from Southern Nevada

OMG, how have you survived all this pain? I have always thought I wouldn't be able to get over this if this happened to me.

I'm going to follow you now.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi writer20 thank you for commenting and for following me. It's very much appreciated.

This is every woman's worst nightmare... only my nightmare actually came true.

How have I survived all this pain? It hasn't always been easy, to be honest. This is just the beginning of the story. There is more to it than what is here. Sadly, the pain only gets deeper.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


femmeflashpoint 5 years ago

Flowers - I read about your struggle regarding whether or not to write.

I'm glad you chose to do it.

What courage it took to wade through the memories, and to place your words so carefully for all the world to see.

There are those who will receive much help and a greater determination to recover by what you have shared here.

My warmest regards and admiration for the obvious sacrifice you made to share something so brutal and life changing.

God bless you and many thanks,

Angelia Phillips


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi femmeflashpoint thank you so much for your kind words. You have touched my heart.

I had been debating whether or not people wanted to hear about this. And the longer I thought about it, the stronger I felt inside that it needed to be done.

Yes, it took a lot of courage to write and almost 9 hours to do it. I feel it was worth it.

I hope that there are those who will benefit from this and get the healing they need. That is why I wrote it. Even those who haven't gone through anything like this, that it would touch their hearts as well.

There is more to this story and the final outcome is....

to be continued...

You are very welcome and may God bless you too! :-)


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 5 years ago from Arkansas, USA

You are so brave in writing this. Your words were so descriptive that I felt almost nauseous in reading this. I agree with Saddlerider with what should be done to those guys. I want to read more of your work. Awesome and voted up!


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Victoria Lynn thank you for commenting. I'm sorry that it sickened you. Abuse in any form sickens me too. The way I wrote this is how events took place. Just wait until you read the rest of the story...

I fully understand the anger aspect all too well...

I hope you enjoy more of my writings. Thank you for the votes they are much appreciated!

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


Victoria Lynn profile image

Victoria Lynn 5 years ago from Arkansas, USA

Field of Flowers--Don't be sorry that it sickened me. That's only because you captured it. You captured the horrow of the event. You showed your writing skills. That's what I was saying there, so don't be sorry. Just keep writing. You have more on the story in your hubs? I will read....Thank you for being such an honest writer.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Victoria Lynn,

I'm glad that my writing skills are coming through to those who read my hubs. I wrote Part 2 of this story, but there is much more to come. And what is yet to be written about it is actually worse than what I have written here.

You are welcome Victoria.

God bless you! :-)


SunnyJay 5 years ago

What a sad story, it was like reading part of my past.

It is amazing how you were able to put it in verse.

Powerful!! Thank you for sharing it with us.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi SunnyJay thank you for commenting. I'm sorry to hear that it reminds you of part of your past. I hope that you have been able to, or will be able to find the healing/forgiveness thats needed to make you whole again.

I have a gift for the written word. I can express my thoughts best in verse.

Powerful indeed!! You are very welcome. I'm sharing it with others in hopes of helping.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


SunnyJay 5 years ago

It was years ago when the lady was to blame for this kind of brutal actions pushed on her.

I got over it, I kept silent like so many of us did. You are so right to write about it !

Thanks again.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi SunnyJay,

I'm hugging you in my heart....


justateacher profile image

justateacher 5 years ago from Somewhere Over The Rainbow - Near Oz...

So sorry that you had to live through that...you are right...monsters like that need to be castrated and maybe it would never happen again....

Great courage in writing this...you are a talented writer!


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi justateacher thank you for your kind words and encouragement! They are appreciated very much! There are times I wonder why I had to go through this... and more. It is then that I remember the compassion I have in my heart towards those who have been abused in life. I hope I can make a difference for them.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


Sunshine625 profile image

Sunshine625 5 years ago from Orlando, FL

Oh my. How tragic. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger....you are one heck of a lady as I can see already! Looking forward to following you! :)


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Sunshine625 thank you for your kind comment about me and for following! Tragic indeed... I'm fortunate to have survived. This gave me compassion for abused people that I may not of had otherwise. It also gave me a heart for something else. I'm writing about that in Part 3. There's more to this story that's even sadder. I'm in the process of mustering up the courage to be able to finish writing it. It's more difficult for me than it was for this one. But, I'm going to do it. I hope to be able to finish it soon to share with everyone. You will see why it's taken me awhile to write it when it's done.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


Cathy I profile image

Cathy I 5 years ago from New York

What a powerful poem. By telling your story, you are healing yourself. Forgiving them and yourself (sometimes people think they may have caused it) will also help. Most of all have no fear that they will not be caught....what goes around comes around. Oh yes, they will pay for their crime against you. It's just that you may never know about it.

May you find peace in your writing and may our Father continue to heal you.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Cathy thank you so very much for commenting. Forgiveness is a key to healing. What goes around comes around... so very true that is. I have no doubt that they will pay for it in some way or other. I may never know how they will pay for it, but that's ok. I left it in God's hands. I'll let Him deal with it. I'm writing about this because I feel I need to share it. May those who have been abused find the peace and healing that's found in God.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


pedrn44 profile image

pedrn44 5 years ago from New Berlin Wisconsin

oh my...so scary...it's probably rare that such a situation would result in you staying alive and able to put this into verse. I am so sorry for what happened to you. There are such ruthless animals in this world. Thank you for sharing.Looking forward to following you.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi pedrn44 thank you for your comments they are appreciated. I am one of the fortunate ones who made it out. My heart goes out to the families who have lost loved ones through this senseless crime. I feel for those who didn't survive.

There are people, or should I say, 'ruthless animals' in this world, who do atrocity's against innocent victims such as I. As Cathy said, what goes around comes around. Somehow, they will be paid back.

Thanks for following me! Have a great day and God bless! :-)


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

Hello Field of Flowers:

It seems that you are helping many and receiving much support from the women. I only wish more of my gender could empathize with your pain. Have a blessed day. Gerry


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi sligobay thanks for stopping by it puts a smile on my face to read your comments. Yes, I've seen from the what people are writing that it is mostly women who are responding. I hope to help many more. May more men like you speak up for and defend those who have been abused. Thank you for your voice!!

Have a great day and God bless you too Gerry! :-)


oballesansano 5 years ago

oh dear, you made me teary eyed while reading till the end :(

how I feel the pain, how I feel the fear.

i just can't spit the lump in my throat, with excitement and fought, the devil in my mind while reading your thoughts.

You wrote this one giving a full illustration behind everyone's imagination.

Superb dear and should be rated +1

Have a good day always :)


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi oballesansano thank you so much for your wonderful comment. I'm glad that I portrayed what I went through as to touch a life. I wrote it as it had happened. Thank you for your votes... it touches my heart.

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


wildove5 profile image

wildove5 5 years ago from Cumberland, R.I.

You have amazing strength!


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi wildove5 thank you so very much for encouraging me!

Have a great day and God bless! :-)


Eddie-Perkins 5 years ago

Vote up. Thought I should start with part one first. I experience both anger and compassion at the same time. God bless you.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi Eddie-Perkins thank you for taking the time to read and comment. It is appreciated. From here it only gets deeper.

Have a great day and God bless you too! :-)


Chatkath profile image

Chatkath 5 years ago from California

I am glad that you were able to share this, I had a similar experience as a very young woman who thought that anywhere would be better than my "home" but sometimes youth can be so very naïve, perhaps fearless - especially if running from something. You are very brave and you are a survivor, although this night will never leave you it sounds like you were able to move forward and focus on healing, using this terror to build an inner strength and faith over time, not allowing this incident to defeat you!

I also wondered whether I should publish my experience, and I decided to do so, in my own way - I suppose we all have a unique way of expressing trauma and I commend you for your ability to revisit a painful incident and to grow from it! Up, useful and awesome!


karissajo profile image

karissajo 5 years ago

I am more than sure each day you now awake, is deeply appreciated and lived better then yesterday. I am deeply sorry to read your words. I am sure you found more strength within yourself then thought to have had.


Tamarajo profile image

Tamarajo 5 years ago from Southern Minnesota

Brilliantly presented! The poetry made it even the more touching and moving.

I am so deeply sorry that happened to you!

Bless you for sharing such a personal story that may very well help someone to identify with your experience.

I can't believe that people can treat others so miserably. It is so evil to use and violate another person in this manner than just throw you away like that. Utterly despicable. Arrogant, prideful, and selfish are just a few things that come to mind.

I am so glad that you survived it all. How terrifying!


Minnetonka Twin profile image

Minnetonka Twin 5 years ago from Minnesota

Very painful to read what these men did to you. I'm glad your alive and hope you've been able to work through this experience.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Many thanks to Chatkath, karissajo, Tamarajo and Minnetonka Twin for all of your wonderful comments and for your encouragement as well. I have survived quite a few experiences that have come my way in life. I have chosen to not let them defeat me, but to make me a better person in the process. Thinking back on some of them the inner strength I have amazes even me at times.

Each and every day that I wake up, I put a smile on my face and I thank God that I have yet another day to be alive and enjoy.

I share my experiences in hopes of helping someone else who may have gone through something similar.

It boggles my mind when I think of how I was treated and that I lived to tell about it. That's the most amazing part of it all.... that I survived. There are many who never made it through...

Many thanks to all who have taken the time to read this. Have a great day and God bless! :-)


kittythedreamer profile image

kittythedreamer 5 years ago from the Ether

Wow...just wow. Seriously, these types of men will get what's coming to them. Even if it isn't karma or god's punishment, to every action there's an equal reaction. I do find that you are a strong and gorgeous woman and thank you so much for sharing to help others in their similar pain. Blessings to you.


Field-Of-Flowers profile image

Field-Of-Flowers 5 years ago from Midwest, USA Author

Hi kittythedreamer thank you so much for your great comments. I agree with you...to every action there's an equal reaction. The way you treat others will come back to you. If you treat others kindly, kindness will be heaped upon you. And if you choose to treat others abusively, or the likes thereof, calamity will be heaped upon you as well.

Your kind words to me are an encouragement, and I thank you for them as well.

There is also Parts 2 & 3 to this story. Part 3 is, I feel, the most intense. I hope you will take the time to read the rest of the story. I do hope that I am an inspiration to those who have been in a similar situation as this. May they find that they are not alone...and that they too can overcome. With God...all things are possible.

Have a great day and God bless you as well! :-)


krisnicole1987 profile image

krisnicole1987 4 years ago from Pearl River, LA

I greatly admire you for your strength which is apparent in your choice of words and art,

how wonderful it is that you were able to share your experience this way.

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working