Top 20 Funniest Face Book Status Updates
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Some of the best status updates you'll read!
If you're like me sometimes it takes awhile to think of a good update to leave your friends laughing on face book. I've taken a collection of some of the funniest updates ever, Enjoy!
- (your name) saw a commercial for the Snuggie. I thought it was stupid idea, but I couldn’t change the channel because I was under a blanket and I didn’t want my arms to get cold…
- thinks that if your relationship status says, "It's complicated" that you should stop kidding yourself and change it to "Single"
- has an oven with a 'stop time' button. It's probably meant to be 'stop timer' but I don't touch it, just in case.
- Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate.
- Top Tip Of The Week: When going through airport customs and you are asked "do you have any firearms with you?" do not reply "what do you need?"
- Don't you just hate it when people say stuff in their status that you really didn't want to know? I hate that. Anyway, I gotta go poop.
- Sometimes I just want to run up to a stranger on the street and say "YOU'RE IT!!" and then run away
- Finds it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?
- is wondering if you can grow marijuana on Farmville then sell it on Mafia Wars?
- dreams of a better world...where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned
- ”The greatest thing about Face book, is that you can quote something and totally make up the source.” – George Washington
- was playing "FARMVILLE" when immigration showed up and took all my workers !
- Is wondering "If you choke a Smurf, what color does he turn?"
- grammar is important. For instance, commas save lives: Let's eat grandpa. Lets eat, grandpa
- hated when old aunts came up to me after weddings and said "u r next" They stopped that when I did the same to them after funerals
- first we had mad cow disease, then we had bird flu, now we have swine flu, O.M.F.G it's FARMAGGEDON
- Automatic doors make me feel like a Jedi
- has discovered the secret to life, but I won't tell you, because it's a secret
- my friends status said " suicidal and standing on a cliff " So I Poked Him.
- 's advise: Follow your dreams, except for that one where you're naked at work
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