Unwell: A Poem

Courtesy of Aviary
Courtesy of Aviary

Unwell: A Poem

I need a shower

to wash away the dirt

no matter how hard I scrub

no matter how bad it hurts

the dirt stays

day after day

for this dirt that won't flee

you just cannot see.

 

There is a demon within me

that demands control

I fight it so hard

to keep it locked down

but the demon fights back

and rises to the surface

then hurts the ones I love

and ruins my life.

 

I've come to realize

that the demon is me

the part I hate

about myself

It's the part that makes me sad

about things I've done that were bad

and again I realize

It's me that's caused all her pain.

 

The wind reminds me of my life

it starts as a gentle breeze

and kisses my cheek

and makes me happy

but the breeze becomes a gust

the gust becomes a gale

it knocks me down

and throws dirt in my eye.

 

Then the rain comes

at first a warm sprinkle

that dances upon my skin

and it makes me happy

but the sprinkle becomes a pour

the pour becomes a cold torrent

it washes me away

and it freezes my heart.

Courtesy of shutterstock
Courtesy of shutterstock

 Floating in the ocean

rocking on a wake

that caresses me in a warm embrace

and it makes me happy

but the wake becomes a wave

the wave becomes tidal

I am tossed and cast into the deep

and finally I am drowned.

 

A casual stroll on the beach

the warmth of the sand

squeezes between my toes

and makes me happy

but the sand turns hot

and is no longer solid

It pulls me in, down toward salvation

Until the darkness embraces me.

 

I'll spend my life

seeking deliverance

Ocassionally happy

the weather will change

and ruin my day

and in the end

I'll cry

when I think about my life.

 

The End

courtesy of terrygeorge.uk
courtesy of terrygeorge.uk

 

© 2010 by Wesley Cox. All rights reserved. Copying without permission is illegal and will be prosecuted.

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Comments 17 comments

dohn121 profile image

dohn121 6 years ago from Hudson Valley, New York

This was very powerful, Wes. You contended with surges of emotions within yourself. Simply manning up to your "demons" is enough to excuse yourself from being one. Great work.

Dohn


Pachuca213 6 years ago

wow...this was powerful. I can relate to this. We all fight the inner conflicts that fight within oneself...sometimes we feel like monsters and other times like lambs..so good! I am proud of you..


lorlie6 profile image

lorlie6 6 years ago from Bishop, Ca

Wesley, what a wonderful expression of the human condition. The light turns dark so inevitably, it seems.

Thanks for expressing such powerful stuff.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Dohn: Thank you so much for reading and enjoying the poem, I am glad that you liked it.

Pachuca: Thank you as well for commenting on this poem, I am thrilled that you liked it.

Lorlie: Thank you lorlie for visiting my page and leaving me such a nice comment.


Hmrjmr1 profile image

Hmrjmr1 6 years ago from Georgia, USA

Wes To sum it up in one word - MAGNIFICENT!


wrenfrost56 profile image

wrenfrost56 6 years ago from U.K.

Another great piece, I'm just sorry that it is inspired by so much pian. 'rocking on a wake' what a great line. :)


kathy little wolf profile image

kathy little wolf 6 years ago from Dusty Trails, Arkansas

Wesley, what great ink, and I for one can relate to

a lil too well I think....

you have inspired me this morning, thank you...

I needed it!!

muah!!


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

John: I always value your opinion and am glad that you've enjoyed this poem. Thank you for reading and commenting brother.

Wrenfrost: Pain seems to be a poets best friend, that and euphoria. Thank you for visiting and I also like that line, I chose it because rocking on a wake is so calming and I needed a calmness before the storm, know what I mean?

Kathy: Thank you so much for reading, I am sorry that you can relate to it but am glad that you appreciate it. I am also glad to have inspired you, wuah!! :)


Dame Scribe 6 years ago

O such be the emotional roller coasters we find ourselves riding but is excellent practice to recognize these moments and their effects. :) Very eloquent, :)


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Dame: Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. You're a gem and your praise is very nice to receive.


George J Hardy profile image

George J Hardy 6 years ago from Southern New Jersey

Sad that dirt manifests itself on the best of us. I`ve often said that there is an uncleanness that cannot be washed away and have observed many who endeavor to do away with it through natural means, only to find how difficult it is. Through personal trials and those of my patients I have found a spiritual side that many miss.Your poem alludes to its discovery.


rls8994 profile image

rls8994 6 years ago from Mississippi

Wonderful expression of inner pain. I, as well as many, can relate to this. Great job!


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

George: Thank you for commenting on this poem, you point out a lot of great points here and I thank you.

rls: Thank you for reading and commenting. I think everyone can relate to it, its part of the human condition. Good vs. Evil maybe.


manlypoetryman profile image

manlypoetryman 6 years ago from (Texas !) Boldly Writing Poems Where No Man Has Gone Before...

Were it that we could drive the demons away...and be at peace with someone that is very important to us...Ourself!

It was brave of you to open this part of your insides up. Your pics and words drive the message home. Dealing with ourself can be a full-time job...sometimes. Hope that you...like myself...and like all of us...can come to peace with the demons.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 6 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

MPM: Thank you for stopping by and reading this one. I'm glad you enjoyed the message of the poem and I hope we are able to deal with our demons. I think maybe it is a life long journey.


sligobay profile image

sligobay 5 years ago from east of the equator

guilt becomes regret, regret becomes sorrow, depression and self-loathing which bcomes Remorse and self forgiveness, God's forgiveness and rebirth as a brand new person.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 5 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012 Author

Thank you for the input sligobay. I hope you enjoyed the poem.

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