What Your Childhood Memories Say About You... And What You Can Do About It: By Dr. Leman
What Your Childhood Memories Say About You..And What You Can Do About It: by Dr. Kevin Leman.
I found this book by chance and was excited to see that it was available at the moment as a free download for my Kindle. I had heard about this author and had my eye out for another one of his books; The Birth Order Book. I was like why not? It is the same author. I have no clue if it is still available for free as you read this review. Things can change quickly in the land of Amazon.
It has been what feels like a long time since I found a book that I was not able to put down. I love immersing myself in a book and due to changes in my health the fact that I now have the attention span of gnat; it was not an easy task. But well worth it.
Dr. Leman starts out with one of these quotes, "While you can't change your past you can change the way you understand it and move forward in light of that understanding." No comment, but it is an extremely important quote to set the mood of this book.
I was blown away with quite a few comments or quotes, (whatever you want to call them) which were perfect timing for my life. I love it when things work that way.
He carried me through a journey on how to use childhood memories to help provide clues to my actual strengths and weaknesses. These truths and weakness are to help me, find the true me, not the me that everybody else sees and believes me to be.
He let's your mind wrap around the idea in which how sometimes the way others perceive us, and what they expect of us can sometimes send us in path in which truly is not ours. Whether we submit to others unwillingly, unconsciously, or submit consciously in order to please the ones we love; it does not matter. It is harmful and can cause havoc to our lives.
I was blown away when he talked about and had mentioned something along the lines of how if people around us expect us to be or act a certain way it was like being thrown into a stage where we do not have the script, but because of others behaviors we might fall right into the character we are expected of. It was such a validation for me and validated my struggles in my life in the last 3-5 years. I removed individuals in my life that where not healthy for me to have around even though I loved them. Even harder, I did not allow individuals in my life that I loved because I knew that I was not healthy for them. Never in my life have I ever done that.
As a early toddler I used to carry a Bible with me, it was blue, even before I could read. It had beautiful pictures of angels that I used to look at an sketch. My childhood built my strength in God and I learned to find joy in moments at a time. No one can take that away from me and for that I love my childhood. I will never allow anyone to tell me any different, I will never doubt myself in this regard.
I remember my mother given my Bible to a friend of hers. She was a maid that worked for one of our neighbors who was taking a risk by marrying a military officer and leaving everything she knew behind. Our neighbors were filling her with fear, "don't leave, you are too young, stay here working for me, he will get bored of you, you will end up in a new place not knowing anyone, and all alone" etc.
My mom introduced her to God, Christ, and I remember not wanting to give up my Blue Bible and she explaining to me that yes, this was a special book and that our friend at the moment needed it more for whatever reason we did not have different one we could give her. I relented and gave it to my mom, which in turn gave it to her friend. I sometimes wonder whatever happened to that friend. Why was she needing to run away with man; why could she just no go? Sorry, my attention, questions that do not belong here.
I love this memory from my mom. I base her true personality on this memory not on anything else. I learned to do this with this book. This is a treasure, I had been debating, doubtful, she died by the time I was 7. I have a few memories and most are filled with ugliness, illness, confusion, but this one, is her, her true identity and I will not let anyone tell me otherwise.
I laughed out loud when I read this statement, "my mind has a pretty convenient auto-delete function." I would like to add to that. No one has the right to force me or anyone to restore what has been auto-deleted by our minds. If and when those memories restore, it will happen when we am truly ready, the mind works like that. For a stranger to try to force them just because they are curious, I believe, is quite unhealthy.
I could go on and on about this book, I learned so much. This book is a little over 200 pages and is well worth the read. It is a treasure that I will continue to reread and reread for I know there is so much in such few words that I still have much to learn from. I am still looking out for his other book and maybe one day that one will also be available for free as an e-book on Amazon. Even if just for a little while, (that message is for you Dr. Leman, in case you happen to end up reading this), giggles.
